PERSONALITY TEST # 4

Jesus felt frustrated, really frustrated. People didn’t seem to be getting what he was trying to say. The worst offenders were his disciples. They were sitting there listening to him in village after village – stop after stop – missing his message – time after time.

One of his favorite themes was this: “Dying to self is more important than dying to be myself.” He was trying to say: “Giving was more important than receiving – serving was more important than being served.” He was trying to say: “When you lose yourself, you can find yourself.”

He found himself wondering: “How many ways can I tell folks that life is all abut dying to self – giving of oneself – mothers taking nine months of life to knit a baby in her womb – and when she sees her baby she realizes it was all worth it.”

He often watched people eating. Bread fascinated him. It would disappear into someone’s mouth – get chewed – and then give energy and life to people. Amazing. This was what life was all about. Dying so others could rise – letting people chew up our time – and get energized because we were there for them.

While eating, while walking, while talking, he would hear the disciples bickering like little kids on who was # 1 and who was Jesus’ favorite – and what rewards they would get in following such an amazing teacher.

When this happened, when things seemed hopeless, Jesus would disappear. Disappearing worked for him. He’d go to the mountains – or the hills – or to a garden or to some deserted place. He just needed to become quiet for a while. He needed to become like bread and disappear into the mouth of his Father and be in communion with Him. This helped.

Then if his disciples didn’t track him down first, he’d come back to be with them. He would say, “Let’s go to new towns and preach and heal and reach out to people in new ways with new words.”

This one particular time, to disappear, he didn’t go to a garden or head for the hills or to a deserted place. This time he disappeared to a spot under a tree he loved to sit under. He loved to put his back against the wood of a tree. It brought him home to the carpenter shop – growing up with Joseph and Mary. It brought him home to his Father. He loved the mysteries of trees – roots and branches – water and earth.

It was night.

He fell asleep – into a deep sleep – into a deep, dark night. Frustration can be exhausting. People, especially those closest to us, can tire us out.

It was morning.

He woke up hearing a farmer singing. This certainly sounded less strident than a rooster. The farmer was singing as he was sowing seed. The field was within a rock’s throw from the tree where he had slept all night.

Jesus sat there watching the farmer. He liked to watch. He liked to listen. He liked to learn how people worked.

Some seed fell on the path. Some fell in shallow soil. Some fell among the weeds. Some fell on good soil. Missed seed didn’t seem to bother this farmer. Jesus laughed. “Farming doesn’t seem to be an exact science like carpentry is. Who would buy a table with 4 different size legs?”

“Better get back to Peter and Andrew and the others ….”

Back he went and it was back on the road again with his disciples.

And once more they were arguing on the road who was #1.

They came into a village and Jesus began to preach. He began to teach what he just seen.

“Once upon a time there was a farmer – a farmer who loved to sing while he worked. It was sunrise. He went out into his field to sow some seed. Some fell on the path that was along side the field. The birds quickly darted down and gobbled up that seed. Some seed landed on rocky ground where there wasn’t that much soil. The bright sun scorched any wheat that sprang up. No roots; no wheat; no bread. Other seed landed on good soil, but soil that was overgrown with thorns and thistles. As soon as the wheat began to grow, the thorns and thistles choked that wheat. Other seed fell on good soil and the wheat in those places flourished – thirty, sixty and a hundredfold – longing to become bread – hungry to feed a hungry world.”

Then Jesus said, “If you have ears, use them to hear the parable that I’m sowing it in the field of your brain.”

The disciples didn’t get it. Embarrassed, they waited till everyone had gone. Then when alone, they asked Jesus, “Why do you keep on speaking in parables?”

“Uuuuuuh!” came a deep groan from Jesus gut. But, instead of escaping again, Jesus spoke plainly – telling them what he was preaching and why he used parables.

“I’m giving you the secrets of the kingdom. To the others I’m giving parables – because they have what Isaiah said, “ears that don’t work – eyes that are closed – and hearts that need healing.”

They were listening.

“The seed that lands on the path are those people who don’t understand that the seed of the word is landing on them – and it just bounces off them.

The seed that lands on rocky and shallow ground are those people who have shallow souls – that can’t deep root the word. As soon as times get tough, they get going. They don’t last.

"The seed that lands on good soil that is flourishing with thorns and thistles, are those people whose can’t hear the word because they have too many things growing in the soil of their soul. Too many cares, too many worries about money, chokes the word and the best of resolutions.

“The seed that lands on good soil are those people who hear the word of God and understand it – and yield a field of thirty, sixty or a hundredfold.

“Oh,” said the disciples.

And Jesus laughed – knowing it was going to take them a long time, a long time for his disciples to become fields that would yield a harvest of thirty, sixty and a hundredfold of wheat – that would become bread – that could unite the world in communion.

© Andrew Costello