“It is not heroin or
cocaine that makes one an addict, it is the need to escape from a harsh
reality.There are more television
addicts, more baseball and football addicts, more movie addicts and certainly
more alcohol addicts in this country than there are narcotics addicts.”
My little daughter
said, "Daddy, I am going to count the stars."
“Very well," I said, "go on."
By and by I heard her counting, "Two hundred
and twenty-three, two hundred and twenty-four. Oh dear!," she said, I had no
idea there were so many!"
I sometimes say in my soul. "Now, Master, I am going to
count your blessings." Soon my heart sighs, not with sorrow, but burdened with
such goodness, and I say to myself, "I had no idea that there were so
many.”
“The truth [is] that there is only one terminal dignity - love.And the story of a love is not important - what is important is that one
is capable of love.It is perhaps the
only glimpse we are permitted of eternity.”
Helen Hayes, Guideposts,
January 1960
Tuesday, May 15, 2018
ON LEAVING
INTRODUCTION
The title of my homily for this Tuesday of the Seventh
Week of Easter is, “OnLeaving.”
If I heard anything from other priests,it’s our “uunh” - a word that won’t make it
in Scrabble - when we read these post
Easter readings - especially from the Gospel of John. We say that because we
like to give a homily on weekdays - but there is too much repetition in these readings
- especially from John
It has a series of themes about loving, remaining in
Jesus’ love, this is my commandment, love one another asI have loved you - and we hear this over and
over again.They are wonderful - but
enough already.
TODAY’S TWO READINGS
So we read the readings a couple of extra times in hopes
something pops up that he have not touched upon lately.
I did that last night and today’s two readings talk about
leaving several times.That’s a
recurring theme: leaving.
So let me see if I can milk some comments about leaving.
LEAVING
That’s something we’re always doing in various ways throughout our life: leaving.
We leave the womb. We leave the hospital.
We leave for school that first time. Then for an
overnight with friends. Then we go off to college or the military or where have
you.
We leave for work. We leave relationships. We leave for
Marriage. We leave after death or a divorce. We leave jobs. We leave when we retire. We
leave for Tennessee or Florida. Someone dies, so we come back home again. Hopefully,
we get out and get moving and get leaving again.
IN THE SCRIPTURES
There’s lots of leaving …. lots of migrations …. lots of
moving in the Bible.Adam and Eve leave
the Garden…. Noah gets on the ark…. Abraham does a lot of moving…. Abraham’s
descendants are often heading elsewhere.
Joseph ends up being sold into Egypt.Moses leaves Egypt. He leads those descendants towards the Promised
Land. They finally leave the desert - and land in the Promised Land.
So there is not only an Exodus, but there’s also the
Exile.
THEN WE GET TO THE NEW TESTAMENT
Jesus moves around in his early years.Then he settles into his quiet years. Then he
finally leaves Nazareth and gets going.
Then he calls disciples to drop everything, to leave home
and to follow him.
Then he leaves his disciples and leaves and ascends into
heaven.
Then we’re called to leave our inner perceptions on how life
is supposed to work.
LESSONS
With all these leaves of absence, we need to learn
something.
We have not here a lasting home here.
We need to learn to let go at times.
We can get stuck in stupidity or sin or regrets or
resentments. I preached on that last Sunday.
When we leave - we can look back from a distance - and see
what’s back home and who’s really important much better.
Absence makes the heart grow fonder. Out of sight, out of
mind can also happen.
We come to church; we leave from church - hopefully all the better.
CONCLUSION
Today - at the end of this day, to ask, “Did I leave a good
feeling in all the rooms I was in today?”
Or in Fortune Cookie Language: So leave that they wished you
stayed more than they wanted to see you leave.”
Thought for today: “Among animals, one has a sense of humor. Humor saves a
few steps, it saves years”
Marianne Moore, “The Pagolin,” 1941
Monday, May 14, 2018
CEMETERY
MOMENTS
INTRODUCTION
The title of my homily is, “Cemetery Moments.”
There are moments and there are moments.
What are your thoughts when you stand on cemetery grass -
and you look down on grey granite cemetery stones- or upright white marble tombstones? What
are your thoughts?What are your
wonderings?
There are stories here. A cemetery is a library - but
most books can’t be opened and read. They are closed books in boxes buried six
feet underground. We don’t know who this person was. Sometimes all we see is a
name and some numbers.
VIETNAM VETERAN’S MEMORIAL
It’s a human experience - this wondering about people
buried beneath our feet - on behind a wall - like the Vietnam Memorial Wall in
Washington D.C.
I’ve been to that Wall a few times. I remember going with
a Vietnamese Redemptorist: Hai Dinh. We were in Washington D.C. and this was
the one place he wanted to see. He was quiet as he stood there. His biggest surprise was - how far away from the Wall - the tall Washington Monument was. When he saw
the Memorial Wall on TV, he noticed the Washington Monument in the sky behind
the memorial.
My experience was different. Every time I’ve been there,
I deliberately looked for a name on that
wall - the brother of a Redemptorist who died in Vietnam: Thomas Francis
Campbell - 19 years of age. Born May 18, 1948. Died April 9, 1968. He was in
Vietnam just a few months: February 6
till April 9, 1968.
YOUR FAMILY STONES - YOUR FAMILY MEMORIALS
Where are your family stones? Who’s buried there?
Has anyone taken pictures and made a photo album of many
of the grave stones they know of in their family. Then they can sit down at
times with that album as a prayer book. It’s as good as an old person’s prayer
book getting fatter and fatter with the years with death memorial cards. Or
they can sit with that photo album and tell the next generation about who has
gone before them?
Does anyone ever take the little ones - or the next few
generations - to the stones and tell the stories?
More and more people are into cremation and some into
saving the cremains on mantle pieces or buried in back yards or at sea. It’s my
opinion that stones - memorial stones - tomb stones last longer that urns -
just as people give diamonds and share the word “forever” with each other.
FEAST OF SAINT MATTHIAS
Today is the feast of Saint Matthias: May 14.
The only thing we know about Saint Matthias is that he
took the place of Judas - and got chosen by a lottery of sorts.After that come the legends and the
traditions.
Some say he traveled to Ethiopia. Others list the region
of modern day Georgia - formerly of the Soviet Union.Catholics, Lutherans and Anglicans honor
him.He is patron saint of alcoholics,
carpenters, Gary Indiana, and Great Falls and Billings Montana. There are
written fragments of the so called Gospel of Matthias - a 2nd
century document from a heretical group.
SISTER MATTHIAS
Now why am I mentioning all this?
When I was a kid, I went with my father to Portland,
Maine to visit his sister, a Mercy Nun, Sister Mary Patrick.We went to the graves of two of his sisters
who were Mercy Nuns as well, but they died in their 20’s - one as a young nun,
29, Sister Matthias, and the other as a
postulant who also got sick and died in her 20’s.
Well, a few years ago some of us from the parish went on
a cruise to New England and 2 places in Canada: St. John’s New Brunswick and
Nova Scotia.
On the day we stopped into Portland Maine I went off by
myself to St. Joseph’s convent - where my dad’s sister worked for 50 plus years
in the kitchen. I didn’t know where anything was, so I didn’t want to stick
anyone with a wild goose chase. Then I walked to a cemetery to find my father’s
sisters. I found 2 of them:Sister Mary
Patrick - and Sister Matthias.
I knew Sister Mary Patrick - but I knew nothing, nothing
about Sister Matthias.I found her grave
- but I didn’t find the other grave.
Anyway I was doing something in memory of Sister Matthias
Costello - and the only other thing on her stone besides her name was: 1884 -
1913.
CONCLUSION
It’s good to know that somewhere 100 years from now, our
names will be somewhere - in a graveyard, on a ship manifesto, in a telephone
book, on a memorial card, in a handwritten something, with the words, “Love”
and then our name.
It’s good to have been here - even if all we did was to
replace someone else - like Saint Matthias - and we did our best.
May 14. 2018
BOYS DO THAT!
Boys do that!
They see a worm.
They see a kid right in front of them.
They put that worm in that kids pocket.
Boys do that!
They see a stick.
It’s dueling season.
It’s hitting season.
Boys do that!
They see a rock.
They see a cow.
They throw that rock at that cow.
Boys do that!
They have been doing these things
ever since their parents told them
to go play outside the cave.
Boys do that!
What? You want them to stop?
Be thankful. They haven’t even discovered
girls yet. Get ready for what’s next.
Boys do that.
Haven’t you heard the old Latin saying,
“Sunt pueri pueri, pueri purerilia tractant.”
“Boys will be boys and they’re always going to be boys.”
“Don’t let your egoget too close to your position, so thatif your position gets shot down, yourego doesn’t go with it.”
Colin Powell
Sunday, May 13, 2018
A LITTLE MUSIC
ON A RAINY DAY
STUCK
INTRODUCTION
The title of my homily is, “Stuck!”
We’re celebrating at this time in the Church Year the
feast of the Ascension. In some dioceses they have this feast on Ascension
Thursday - and other dioceses like our Baltimore Archdiocese - we have this feast today.
I surmise that some people surmise that if we keep it on
Thursday, then a lot of people will miss out on the feast - so let’s celebrate
on the Sunday after Ascension Thursday.
As far as I know there has never been a move to put
Christmas on a Sunday - like the Sunday after December 25th.
So here we are: let’s not miss out on this feast of the
Ascension.
SCENE FROM THE FIRST READING
In today’s first reading from the opening of the Acts of the Apostles [1:1-11],
Jesus is lifted up and ascends into the heavens. Everyone is standing there
dumb - looking upwards. Two men dressed in white garments say, “Men of Galilee,
why are you standing there looking at the sky? This Jesus who has been taken up
from you into heaven will return in the same way as you have seen him going
into heaven.”
When I read that I heard the human shout in times of
trouble: “Don’t just stand there. Do something.”
When I read that I also thought of the human feeling: “I’m
stuck!”
So I began thinking about the human experienceof being stuck.
When was the last time you were stuck?
So the title of this homily is, “Stuck!”
LOOKING AT OUR LIFE
Looking at our life, we’ve all experienced being stuck.
Someone’s in the bathroom…. hurry up.
Stuck in traffic.
Stuck in the past.
Stuck in a horrible work situation.
Stuck in a marriage that is falling apart.A spouse is drinking - or on drugs. Stuck in a hurt. Stuck in a mistake. Stuck in a resentment. Stuck in a regret.
Stuck in a sickness.
Stuck with a noisy neighbor - who likes to do his lawn at
6:30 every Saturday morning.
We get stuck in our thinking, in our ways, in a depression,
in a darkness.
We get stuck in a 5 year period in our lives.We’re still back there when we were 17 or 27
or 37 - and here we are in real time but ….
We’re stuck with our kid whose marriage fell apart and
they need us - for a place and a place for their three kids - and we thought we
finally reached retirement, a nice clean empty nest, and the price of cruises
have come down.
Stuck. Now what?
Layne Stayly, a musician, said, “When everyone goes home,
you’re stuck with yourself.”
We’re with ourselves and this is all we got- and we’re not enough.
Stuck is a real reality to ponder from time to time -
maybe now, today. It’s a rainy day. It’s Ascension Thursday on a Sunday. It’s Mother’s Day. We’re in church.
I spotted the following excerpt from a novel by Catherine Lacey, Nobody is Ever Missing. It’s written
in befuddled language. It’s written in images and words that can give us a
feeling of what’s going on with someone. Let me see if I can read it and give
Catherine Lacey her due.
“I realized that even if
no one ever found me, and even if I lived out the rest of my life here, always
missing, forever a missing person to other people, I could never be missing to
myself, I could never delete my own history, and I would always know exactly
where I was and where I had been and I would never wake up not being who I was
and it didn't matter how much or how little I thought I understood the mess of
myself, because I would never, no matter what I did, be missing to myself and
that was what I had wanted all this time, to go fully missing, but I would
never be able to go fully missing—nobody is missing like that, no one has ever
had that luxury and no one ever will.”
Not being married, I
wondered what would that be like if I was married to someone who felt like that
way - someone who wanted to be missing.
Not being married, I would
hope married folks who feel stuck that way, would get counseling or would get
talking and listening.
It’s Springtime…. Couples: it’s Spring!What does your clock look
like after supper or Sunday afternoons?I am a strong stressor of couples at least once a week taking a walk
with each other.I know a couple. The
wife got big time cancer and she is recovery mode, thank God. They are in their
50’s and they find themselves walking each evening - well not every evening -
but many evenings - and it’s been the best move they have made in their marriage
so far. Death - the fear of death - cancer - can get folks moving.
Once more the words from
today’s first reading, “Why are you standing there looking at the sky.”
Get moving.
Ascend. Climb out of your pits.
In 5 years, that’s May 12,
2023, if you call me here at St. Mary’s or in our nursing home or you’re standing
at my grave and you and your spouse have been walking these 5 years and it has
done wonders for your life, your relationship, your perspective, I would love
to hear a “Thank you.”
And I thank the couple who
told me they havebeen doing a lot of
walking these past two years. I have. We're blessed to have the Naval Academy and Quiet Water's Park. Where are your walking places?
IT’S MOTHER’S DAY
Today is also Mother’s Day.
We celebrate with gratitude - not just our birth - not
just the gift of life - but for all the times our mother was there when we were
afraid, when we were stuck, and we sucked our thumb - the most basic sign
language message, “I want my mommy.”
Just watch the optics of a baby - of every little kid -
when they find themselves in a scary, sticky, stucky place. They look for their
mom.
Dad’s relax. We’ll give you a plug, next month. MARY THE MOTHER OF GOD - AND MOTHER OF OUR CHURCH
As priest, as Catholic, I’ve often wondered about the
Catholic practice of honoring and praying to Mary the Mother of Jesus.
Sometimes Protestants ask us about our "thing" about Mary. Answer: one answer is right
here at the experience of being stuck. Watch kids when stuck, when scared, when afraid. and see how they want their mother.
As a Redemptorist, I’ve wondering about the picture or
ikon of Mary, Mother of Perpetual Help. Why is it so popular? Answer: it’s that last word, “Help!”
Help is the one word prayer and answer for anyone who is
stuck.
In the English classic book on spirituality, The Cloud of
Unknowing, the author says, “When a person is in a burning building, they don’t
have to taught the most basic human prayer and scream, “Help!”
Mom. Thanks for all the times you’ve been there to help.
CONCLUSION
I think of the refrain in the Beatles song about all this.
They have captured the scene of Mary under the cross at Calvary as they sing,
When I find myself in times of trouble
Mother Mary comes to me
Speaking words of wisdom
"Let it be."
And in my hour of darkness
She is standing right in front of me
Speaking words of wisdom
"Let it be".
I prefer the Serenity Prayer. Sometimes we have to learn to let it be, that is, to accept the things we cannot change. However, there are times when we are stuck, but we can work to change the things we can change.
In other words: don’t just stand there. Get moving and do
something that you can do.
May 13, 2018
Thought for today:
“My child looked at me and I looked at him in the delivery room, and I realized that out of a sea of
infinite possibilities it had come down to this: a specific person, born on the
hottest day of the year, conceived on a Christmas Eve, made by his father and
me miraculously from scratch.”
