March 28, 2022

 

 MY  DEMONS

 

 

Found the following scribbled in one of my notebooks, “In Edward Albee’s play, ‘A Delicate Balance’, Mother says we sleep to let the demons out.’”

 

Never saw the play, nor do I know where I found that comment. All I know is that it must have hit me then that I have demons and I realize it also hits me now.

 

Demons ….

 

Never really thought much about demons, Never read much about demons. I do know that the Bible mentions demons.

 

Demons….

 

Well, what about them?

 

Who has done work on demons? Is there a good book on them? Are there lists and types of demons?

 

I don’t know.

 

Next question: do I believe in them?

 

I must think so, because when I read Albee’s words, I found myself asking, “Well, what are my demons?”

 

If according to Albee, sleep is the key, then the stuff of my dream are greed and need, laziness and jealousy, lust and fear.  Those are main energies – capital sin stuff. They are the stuff of my demons – procrastination but mostly fear.

 

They are there when I wake up in jumble of forgotten things I failed to do -  and sometimes – but very rarely does the demon of anger appear.

 

So I don’t feel like the characters in the Gospel of Mark – who seem to have whole boatloads  of demons – demons that shriek out [1:24] and who want a wild ride in pigs down a hill side and into the lake to drown [5:13].

 

According to the Enneagram my sin is pride.

 

Come to think about this -after reading Albee’s comment once again. It fits. Albee is right. I want to be loved and liked and I fear making mistakes in public and being rejected. Who wants that stuff?

 

So I hope this piece is something you can try on as well as me. Amen.

 

 

© Andy Costello, Reflections 2022