MARRIAGE RENEWAL READING

Poem for Today - August 23, 2014

LOVE

I love you,
Not only for what you are,
But for what I am
When I am with you.

I love you,
Not only for what
You have made of yourself,
But for what
You are making of me.
I love you
For the part of me
That you bring out;
I love you
For putting your hand
Into my heaped-up heart
And passing over
All the foolish, weak things
That you can’t help
Dimly seeing there,
And for drawing out
Into the light
All the beautiful belongings
That no one else had looked
Quite far enough to find.

I love you because you
Are helping me to make
Of the lumber of my life
Not a tavern
But a temple;
Out of the works
Of my every day
Not a reproach
But a song.

I love you
Because you have done
More than any creed
Could have done
To make me good
And more than any fate
Could have done
To make me happy.
You have done it
Without a touch,
Without a word,
Without a sign.
You have done it
By being yourself.
Perhaps that is what
Being a friend means,
After all.

© Roy Croft

This reading is 

often read 

at wedding 

ceremonies
as well as at
anniversaries.

FRIENDSHIP

Poem for Today – August 22, 2014

LOYALTY

He may be six kinds of a liar,

He may be ten kinds of a fool,

He may be a wicked highflyer

Beyond any reason or rule;

There may be a shadow above him

Of ruin and woes to impend,

And I may not respect, but I love him,

Because—well, because he's my friend.

I know he has faults by the billion,

But his faults are a portion of him;

I know that his record's vermilion

And he's far from the sweet Seraphim;

But he's always been square with yours truly,

Ready to give or to lend,

And if he is wild and unruly,

I like him—because he's my friend.

I criticize him but I do it

In just a frank, comradely key,

And back-biting gossips will rue it
If ever they knock him to me!

I never make diagrams of him,

No maps of his soul have I penned;

I don't analyze—I just love him,

Because—well, because he's my friend.

© Berton Braley

STILL LIFE

A Poem for Today - August 21, 2014

FOR POETS

Stay beautiful

but don’t stay underground too long

Don’t turn into a mole

or a worm

or a root

or a stone

Come in out the sunlight

Breathe in trees

Knock out mountains

Commune with snakes

and be the very hero of birds

Don’t forget to poke your head up

and blink

think

Walk all around

Swim upstream

Don’t forget to fly

© Poem by Al Young

Painting on top:
Still-Life With Insects
and Amphibians, 1662,
by Otto Marseus Van Schrieck

THE EYES

HAVE IT

The eyes have it.

We have these other senses: taste, touch, smell and hearing.

Along with sight – they are the classic five.

Still the eyes have it.

At least I think so…..

Then there are these other senses various scientists have come up with: a sense of balance, pain, a thermal sense, that is, having a sense of hot and cold – as well as having a kinesthetic sense – that is, sensing the energy that comes from motion and tensions.

Still the eyes have it.

At least I think so.

Coaches tell players – coaches yell to and at players – using these two fingers – pointing towards one’s eyes, “Keep your eye on the game – on the ball  - on the scene – on what’s happening.”

The eyes have it.

One piece of advice for you for this year: “Keep your eyes on your kids.” Whether your role is good cop or bad cop, keep your eyes on your kids.

This past year I read an article in some Sunday newspaper magazine – which said that many people when they are talking to other people – don’t look the other in the eye.

When I read that, I said, “Oh my God, that’s me.”  When I am talking with someone, when I begin thinking as I’m talking, I tend to look elsewhere.

How about you?

Well,  ever since reading that, I found myself working on that.

So if you want one recommendation from this short presentation tonight, or one piece of advice for this coming year:  as parents – keep your eyes on your kids – look them in the eye. Watch where they go, watch what they are doing. When communicating “about last night” – look them in the eye and see if they can look you in the eye.

What color eyes do your kids have?

For Mother’s Day –  a long time ago – I saw an ad in The New York Times about restoring a picture of your mom for Mother’s Day. Well, my mom had this neat picture of herself  as a young lady. She’s  around 20. She’s living in Boston at the time. Well, I borrowed the picture – assuming nobody would notice. I take it to Macy’s to get the picture improved as a gift for Mother’s Day. In the picture she is sitting. Standing next to her is a cousin with her hand on my mom’s shoulder.

I asked the person at the counter in Macy – if he could remove the lady from the picture.

“Piece of cake,” he said.

This was years and years before computers and digital cameras and Photo Shop.

Then the guy said, “I can colorize this black and white photo if you want.”

I said, “Great!”

Then he said, “What color are your mom’s eyes?”

I didn’t know – so the guy gave my mom my color eyes.

When my sister saw the picture – she said, “Mom doesn’t have greenish brown eyes.”

Message: look people in the eye.

The eyes have it.

When seeing your kid – especially when they are acting stupid – see their whole life.

Picture the first time you saw your kid – a tiny baby in the hospital.

The eyes have it.

In our office, just down the corridor outside this church, a gal named Ann Marie works. Well, she just had a baby the other day – Alice Marie. Still in the hospital, this afternoon I held Ann Marie’s new baby – now 7 pounds 4 ounces – in my arms.

Stupid me didn’t look Alice - the new baby - in the eye – I didn’t know the content of this reflection till tonight – when I worked on this talk after supper. But actually Alice’s eyes were closed the whole time.

But I did notice her mom and her dad’s eyes – and the smiles that went with those eyes – experiencing this first child of theirs.

Imagine all – the all – that is going on in their brains – right now – the stuff seeing their tiny baby is triggering.

As someone said, “The eyes are the windows of the soul.”

The eyes have it.

Picture the times you saw your kid in her first musical or play or game.

Picture the times your kid looked up to see you seeing them on the field of play.

Picture their eyes looking at your face – approval or disapproval – with their report card – and their marks.

Are you the type who sees the one D and misses all those A’s and B’s or C’s?

Are you the type that uses the pronoun “you” or “we” when a kid gets mostly “D’s” in his or her report card. “What can we do to work on improvement here? What can we come up and be eye to eye with?”

The eyes have it.

Picture a father’s face when he walks his daughter down the aisle on her wedding day – or a mom sitting there in church – watching her son’s face on his wedding day.

See the tears that form in those eyes.

The eyes have it.

See your kids’ faces when they see the face of their first child – making you a grandmother or grandfather. Oh my God, how time flies.

The eyes have it.

See your kids not seeing your face – or anybody’s face – but just the face of an iPhone – at supper or at the breakfast table.

I love one of Harry Chapin’s songs when he talks about his daughter and catching her eye – eye to eye – at one super special moment – and then she’s back to the dance of life – she’s back to her make-up and things.

The eyes have it.

This year look your kids in the eye. Don’t yell at them: “Look me in the eye when I’m talking to you.”

But look into their eyes – at least one moment each day – and notice by doing this that there is no escape – we are family.

Remember those days when you sat with him or her in a soft chair and you stared him or her in the eye – and asked this little 7 month old baby – “What’s going on in there? Hi! And your eyes are 3 inches away from each other and then you rub tips of your noses with each other.

I realize those childhood – eye ball to eye ball moments – lessen – as kids move towards the slow separation in becoming themselves – and kids start saying those dragged out, “Daaaaad!” or “Mooooooommm!” sounds.

It’s then parents have to spot those possible eye-opening moments – like the two of you are alone in a car. Your eyes are on the road. Your kid wants to put on different music – and wants to be somewhere else . You’re not looking into each other’s eyes. Your kid can’t escape – you’re going 55 miles per hour – and you see this as a moment to ask, “How are you doing?” Or “Hi what’s going on in there? I hope you have at least one moment every week – when you have an opportunity to be with each other – to talk to each other – I to I. 

Be aware! I’ve heard kids say, “I haven’t really talked to my dad or my mom – she or he – is always somewhere else.”

Instead of face book – or iPhone – have an eye to eye look into each other’s soul.

Ooops forgot to add: Don’t forget to let your kids see you doing this with each other.

The eyes have it.

Life each day has a roll call.

Our name is spoken by God and by others: ______

Then we have a chance to respond:  “Present” or better, “I’m here.”

It’s then we have a chance to say to God and one another: “I love you!” “I’m here for you!” “I’m listening. What’s happening with you?”

The eyes have it.

So that’s my thought for this evening. Thanks for listening!

Oops that’s another sense – hearing. I’ll save that for another talk.

[Presentation: St. Mary's High School - Orientation Evening for Parents of New Students - August 20, 2014]

After last nights - presentations at St. Mary's Church - as parents and staff headed for Marian Hall, various people saw the following rainbow with their eyes - and out came the cameras. Here are 2 pictures sent by Christine Bervid -  with the names of the great picture takes below each picture.

[Taken by Katie Petrides]

[Taken by Jimmy Ellis]

WORLD WAR POEM, #3

Poem for Today - August 20, 2014

THE  BATTLE OF THE SOMME (1916)

They lie, such twisted flesh, so many numbered dead
in mud long bitter day, stained this earth blood red.
For King young lives were laid. for god and glory bound
hope that bloomed, called victory, broken on the ground.

Sky, long filled with flame, shell and killing bomb
so began this hell, The Battle of the Somme.
Seven days of thunder, deep German trenches shelled
to wrest this muddy waste, the enemy strong held.

Battle cry ' Advance ' from throats a bloodied roar
curse this bitter day, curse this bitter war.
Twenty miles or more, so young, they marched to hell
towards the trench bound foe, beneath the killing shell.

Bullet screams of anger, torrent death of steel
ripped the waiting flesh, with biting thoughtless zeal.
They fell, they fell so many, still they marched and more
heaped they lay unmoving, this graveyard battle floor.

Torn amidst the twisted wire, grotesque their dying fall
till left the fields of carrion, where only wounded crawl.
Battles end now came, a million more they lay
blood that soaks this earth. God I curse this day.

© Black Narcissus

-        Barry Hopkins

WHERE'S HITLER?

WHERE WERE YOU

IN YOUR CLASS PICTURE?

I’ve often read that if we’re in a photograph, the first person we look for in a group photo is oneself?

Is that true? Is that true for you?

Where were you in your class picture?

On top is a class photo of some 4^th graders – in an all-boys school.

I spotted this picture in a very thought provoking book: Photoanalysis.

The author is Dr. Robert U. Akeret.

It’s sub-title is, “How to interpret the hidden psychological meaning of personal photos.”

On page 143 you’ll find the photo on top. The author says, “Find the Fuhrer in this photograph.”

Then he says, “One of the children in this school picture is Alois Schicklgruber, or Adolf Hitler, as he later became.”

I looked at the picture and I didn’t guess which one was little Alois.

Before checking below for the answer, check the picture – study the picture – and see if you’re sharper than me. Where’s Alois or Adolf?

In my 8^th grade graduation class – all the boys were on one side and all the girls on the other side – and I was in the back – near the corner -  far left - looking out. I remember a bunch of us were trying to shake the whole stands – to see if we could get a good laugh – that is, till our 8^th grade teacher yelled at us.

In our graduation from the Minor Seminary, I was in the 3^rd row – out of 4 rows – on the far left looking at the camera.

In our religious profession picture – after taking our vows  - I was in the 3^rd row out of 4 rows – left  center looking out.

Where are you in your class photos?  Do you still have them? If you don’t,  could you get a copy somewhere, somehow.

And some of you might say, “Why in the world would I want to do that?”

Okay, I stalled long enough – here’s the answer to the “Where’s Alois?” question.

There he is – with arms folded – top row - exact center – and the author adds, “not only central, but also slightly higher than anyone else in the photo.”

Did you guess it?

SQUEEZE

INTRODUCTION

The title of my homily for this 20^th Tuesday in Ordinary Time is, “Squeeze.”

In our readings at Mass, whenever we have Jesus’ comment about the difficulties in being rich – as difficult as it would be for a camel to squeeze through the eye of a needle – all kinds of thoughts and questions hit me. How about you? 

This image from Jesus about the camel and the eye of a needle can be found in three of the four gospels: Matthew 19:24, Mark 10:25 and Luke 18:25.

Down through the years I’ve heard different explanations – that the eye of the needle was a small gate in Jerusalem – and a camel had to get down on its knees to squeeze through that gate. I’ve also heard it refers to a big fat rope trying to get through an small anchor hole in a boat. [1]   Or it could simply mean -  as someone said - exactly what it says: it's difficult for those who are rich to enter the kingdom of Heaven - as difficult as it would be for a camel to fit through the eye of a needle.

Thinking about this message I get many wonderings. How about you? Here are 10.

TEN WONDERINGS

# 1 - Obviously rich means riches and stuff. I love a scene I saw  in a short video once. It explains what Jesus said very clearly to me. The video shows a man walking down a street with 2 big suitcases – a back pack on his back – a camera around his neck - along with some other carry on bags. He stops at a house which has a small doorway. Holding on to all his luggage he tries to enter the doorway, but he can’t fit in. So he shrugs his shoulders and moves on. As he continues walking down the street a little kid with just himself – comes running down that same street. He stops at that house and then runs right into that house with ease.  In the background is heard this text about the camel as well as another message from Jesus: unless you be like little children, you’ll never enter the kingdom of heaven.[Cf. Matthew 18:3.]

# 2 - Can we stretch the message and the metaphor and ask: does the person who knows too much – have room in their head – to fit in another question or observation and perhaps be poor and humble enough to hear what someone else in the community has to say? In other words, can know- it-alls, squeeze in the truth or at least a question?

# 3 - Is it better to grow up in a house with one bathroom  compared to a house with three bathrooms. Does small get all to think of others more – compared to those who live in bigger houses with fewer people? 

# 4 - Is it better for kids to go to a school where there is limited space – more kids in the classes – and kids from various classes – colors – and backgrounds – in each class?

# 5 - Is it better to grow up poor – where parents had to struggle to make ends meet – by various strategies to stretch a dollar and squeeze a nickel – and hear lots of “no’s – sorry we can’t afford that”?

#6 - Is it better for a family or a bunch of high school kids having to be squeezed into a tiny bug or a compact car – to get to school. Does 3 or 4 kids – or 3 adults -  squeezed into a back seat every day – make them more aware of others – and give them that great line for when they are parents: “When I was a kid...." or "When I was your age....”?

# 7 - Do the poor and the immigrant – especially the illegal immigrant  - who had to squeeze  through  holes in walls and openings in fences – to get out of where they were – with a dream for a better life elsewhere - bring more to the table – more to a new country - than we’ll those who have been around here for a few generations - a distance from when their parents squeezed into our country?

# 8 - Do those who have experienced a broken marriage or split family or divorce or poverty have a classroom experience in their home – that can help them understand others for the rest of their lives?

# 9 - Do those who experience more deaths than others – say less, “Why is God doing this to me?” Do they see more and then realize more and say more: “Maybe this is why God squeezed into us – in Jesus – so God could know firsthand what it is to be human – what it is to be rejected – what it is to be spit at – and beaten – and crucified on a cross?"

# 10 - Do we have to experience being first on line - when suddenly someone shuts the door we're next to enter? Then another door on the other side of the room opens up and the last on our line rush over for that door or gate that has just opened – and now their first?  How many of those kinds of experiences get us to laugh at life – and prepare us for heaven? Amen.

NOTES

[1] Daniel Harrington, S.J., “The Gospel According to Mark, on page 618 in The New Jerome Biblical Commentary, edited by Raymond E. Brown, Joseph Fitzmyer, and Roland Murphy,