Sunday, February 19, 2017

FEBRUARY 19, 2017


RESTAURANT DOORS

Why is it that restaurant doors
that can be seen from so many
seats in the house - get every
person in every seat in the
house to turn to see who just
came in the door? Isn’t anyone
interested in “What’s to eat?”




© Andy Costello, Reflections  2017


NICE GRUDGE

VERSION ONE

Once upon a time a man came up with a novel idea for a pet shop.

His unique idea ended up making him millions and millions of dollars.

His idea became so popular that he had a chain of these pet stores all across the country. You could see them everywhere: “N AND G Pet Shop.” You could find one in the biggest shopping centers as well as small ones.

He was a success. His idea was very unique.

And it’s strange and a surprise that his pet shops were so successful, because they only sold two pets: one was called a “Nice” and the other was called a “Grudge”.

The Nice were nice and furry, soft and cushy. You would fall in love with a Nice as soon as you saw one. It was so warm, so cuddly, such a gentle, loving animal.

In other words, there was no contest. You didn’t have a choice. As soon as you walked into a N And G Pet Shop and saw a Nice, you had to have one.

So everybody wanted a Nice, especially in comparison to a Grudge.

On the other side, the Grudges were ugly, skinny, scrudgy, scraggy. They were angry looking animals. They stayed there cowering in the corners of their cages. But if you came close to their cages, they would always snarl at you or anyone and everyone who walked over to look at them in their cages. Their porcupine like hair stuck out like so many warning needles: “Don’t even think of coming near me.”

They were just the opposite to the Nice who would be leaning up over the edges of their boxes as soon as you walked into a N and G Pet Shop.

That’s right. You got it. The Nice were in open simple cardboard boxes  open at the top - while the grudges were kept in steel tight locked cages.

So obviously, everybody who came to the pet shops would always buy a Nice and never buy a Grudge.

And obviously, somebody, somewhere, sometime had to ask the obvious question: why then are they selling Grudges when nobody would ever buy one? Why not just sell a Nice?

As it always happens, a newspaper editor asked one of her  reporters, to do a story on these N and G Pet Shops and their phenomenal success.

So on Monday morning, new newspaper reporter, Jane Harris, with pad and pen and tape recorder, headed for a local shopping center. She had the things she wanted to ask about jotted down on her pad. “1) 2) 3) 4) 5) .” Having heard about N and G Pet Stores in talking to people and how they were selling just two pets and what they were like, Jane figured the secret of their success was just that. It was like sort of like, “Good Cop / Bad Cop”, “Bait and Switch”. People are always coming up with unique ways to make money.

So her newspaper article was already being written in her mind as she walked into a N and G Pet Shop. She posed as a customer.

She wondered if the success of these nation wide pet stores was in the contrast. Have the Grudges up there for sale and everybody buys the expensive Nice.

As she continued her investigative reporting— as she continued to write her article for the newspaper - she began to have more questions than answers.

What's the theory here?

So she went into several more of the N and G Pet stores at random.

In every story there would be the long line - but always on the side of the store where there would be the Nices —far away from the other side of the store where there would be the Grudges.

Obviously, people felt much safer on the Nice side.

Something felt funny!

She wondered why there were so many Nices. How could multiply that fast?

She went back to a few of the same stores - a few times - and even though she held her distance, she noticed that the Grudges were not the same ones who were in the cages she visited the day before.

A major question hit her: Could it be that the owners were selling more Grudges than Nices?

Impossible.

So she began to hide in the parking lots of shopping centers where they had these pet shops. She would see cars coming at night and people would get out and look both ways and take out of their cars a cardboard box—go back into the store and come out 10 minutes later with a cage.

They were trading in the Nices for Grudges.

Sometimes people would go into a store and come out with a Grudge in a cage.

Next she talked with the owners and finally someone said, “The Grudges are animals that people keep wanting, keep feeding. The Grudges can be use to protect you when someone attacks or hurts you. They can protect you when you’re angry.

So to be honest, we have found out people rather have a Grudge than a Nice.

VERSION TWO

Once upon a time a man came up with a novel idea for a pet store.

His idea became so popular, so unique, that he opened up these pet stores all over the country.

It became a chain store business.

And they became so successful -- perhaps because these pet stores were so unique.

They sold 2 pets. Just 2 pets.

The first pet was called a “Nice”. It was an unique pet. It was nice so it was called a “Nice”.

A Nice was a furry, cushy, cuddle, warm little animal. If you walked into one of these pet stores and saw a Nice, you would automatically want one.

This would happen especially, because the other pet was a “Grudge”.

A Grudge was skinny, had porcupine like hair, was scrounge and scraggly, cowering, always backed up against the cage wall furthest from a viewer.

But the Nice was always in the edge of his box, not a cage, with its paws up on the sides, like hands, looking at each customer with a bright smile and a pawshake.

The Nice always had a nice smile and looked right at you.

And the people going into the pet store always walked out having bought a Nice.

Who would want to buy a Grudge, especially because these stores were always filled with people.  How could you walk in and buy a Grudge?

Well, time went on and money rolled in and the owners of the Pet Stores kept on making money and more money.

Well, as always happens, a reporter got the idea to do a story on these pet shops and why they were so popular.

So he visited all the Pet Shops and as he stood there watching the crowds, while he stood there seeing the Nices on one side of the store and the Grudges on the other side, he started to notice that people walked out with a box with a Nice in it and never a cage with a Grudge in it. He wondered, why were these stores selling Grudges if nobody ever bought one.

That intrigued him.

So he did some more undercover investigation.

He went to as many of these “Nice Pet Stores” as he could and he would stand on line - always to buy a Nice and then when he’d get up close to the counter, he’d look at his watch and go semi out loud, “Oh no,” snapping his fingers and then head out of the store, saying “Sorry” to the customers behind him as he made his way out of the store. They would all smile, glad that they would be served that much sooner.

That much sooner they would  be walking out of the story with a nice Nice.

He noticed people always bought a Nice and they always had enough of them in the store and nobody would buy a Grudge.

Nobody.

It was the same in every store. People only bought a Nice. They never bought a Grudge.

“Why are they selling Grudges then? Why? When nobody is buying one? Why And why are there always more Nices and few Grudges, if they are selling only Nices.”

And then one day, he snapped his finger. He had the answer. It was so simple.

Put the ugly Grudges in the store on one side and put the nice Nices on the other side and people will always buy a Nice because who wants to own a Grudge?

It was the basic principle in advertising: Use Contrast.

This is much better than that, so I’ll buy this.

So he began writing his article and just as he was finishing it, he said to himself, “Wait a minute? Something is still wrong.”

That afternoon he was in one of the Pet Shops that he had been in a few times and there was one Nice there that he thought he had seen before.

Was it the child of a Nice? Was it a twin? Are they being cloned?

So the next day he went back to a Nice pet store and studied the Nices.

He wanted to go over to the Grudges - but he hesitated because the thought everyone in the store would be loking at him. They would be judging him.

For a whole week he kept on going back for 3 weeks and sure enough there were the same Nices he had seen earlier.

Something is funny here.

So one night he went back to the shopping center and parked his care and turned off the lights and waited.

Every once and a while a car would come into the Shopping Center Mall and drive slowly to the back.

5 minutes later the car would leave just as suspiciously as it came. Then 15 minutes later another car would come and do the same thing -- going around to the back. So he got out of his car and silently and sneakily snook back to the back. He got himself behind a dumpster not far from the Pet Shop back door. In the shadows he waited. Sure enough another car came. A man got out carrying a cardboard box. He was bringing back his nice. And 3 minutes later he came out with a Grudge in a cage.

What! What’s going on?

He had the beginning of a great story.

They were trading in their Nices for a Grudge.

Why?

This triggered in the reporter all kinds of questions. All kinds of wonderings. He needed to do more research.

And that’s what he did.

He wrote down the license plate of every car that came back at night and then would check out who they were.

He discovered they were everyone.

And he began asking Grudge owners about their Grudges.

And people would finally open up and say that it was much easier to keep a Grudge than keep a Nice.

You have to be Nice to a nice. But you can yell at a Grudge or you can take care of your Grudge.

And on second  thought, it is much easier to feed your Grudge and nurse your Grudge. 

it’s too much to keep a Nice.

It’s hard to always be nice, be like a Nice, keep a smile, reach out to everyone.


“Then people will use you. People will expect a lot from you. But Grudges are better and bitter. You can use them to protect yourself when people want to use you. 


CHERISH  NO  GRUDGE

INTRODUCTION

The title of homily for this  7th Sunday in Ordinary Time is, “Cherish No Grudge.”

CNG: “Cherish No Grudge.”

That mini-commandment can be found in today’s first reading from the Book of Leviticus - Chapter 19: verse 18. “Take no revenge and cherish no grudge against any of your people. You shall love your neighbor as yourself: I am the Lord.”

Evidently, the author or authors of Leviticus saw what grudges sound and look like and what they did to people - and posted grudges are dangerous.

So too Jesus, in today’s gospel. He is telling his disciples how to deal with anger, revenge, grudges. Stop poking and punching and slapping other people in the eye or face or cheek. Go the extra mile with others - friends, enemies, borrowers, and people who love to sue. [Cf. Matthew 5:38-48.]

So that will be the stuff of this sermon. I divided it up into 3 rough parts:
What is a grudge?  How much do they weigh? How to get rid of them?

FIRST - WHAT IS A GRUDGE?

They are the lingering thoughts and feelings from hurts - or setbacks - or attacks - or the bad stuff that happens to both good and bad people.

Grudges….

Grr sounds are not good sounds - coming out of the mouth of grizzly bears or angry people. Grudge, grumble, gripe, grr.

Grudges - we put them in our back packs - on our backs - or in the back of our mind - and they show up on our face - grimaces instead of smiles - especially when so and so or such and such shows up. 

SECOND - HOW MUCH DO THEY WEIGH?

I was thinking last night as I was writing this homily that a good question about a specific grudges could be: how much does it weigh?

Get a clean piece of paper - or line up a clean page on your computer screen. On the center top - in big print - all capital letters - put the word, “Grudges.” Then on the top left hand corner put 100 pounds - then below that about 7 spaces down - 75 pounds - then below that 50 pounds - then below that 25 pounds - then near the bottom - put 5 pounds.

Next looking at our life - at our grudge history - put down at least one 100 pound grudge - a time when we were really hurt or angry - or devastated - and we were talking - screaming - crying inwardly - for a while afterwards.

We had a grudge….

It could have been a divorce. We were cheated on. Or our parents broke up. Or we caused a problem and we have a grudge against ourself for being so dumb or selfish. It could have been a death. Our child died suddenly or drowned and we have at least a 100 pound grudge with God.

Looking at our life, name a few 100 pound grudges. If we have a good marriage, do this together - but in the morning. Growling grudges can affect our sleep.

Then a 75 pounder. We were fired - dropped without warning - or the company moved to Malaysia or Manassas or whatever.

Then a 50 pounder. Then a 25 pounder. Then a 5 pounder.

It could be a comment. It could be dumb night of drinking - when a lot of bad stuff came down.

I think by making a list and then weighing grudges - we can get a beginning look at recovery or letting go.

THIRD QUESTION: HOW TO DEAL WITH THEM?

How to books are the books that people buy.

Would you buy a book entitled, How to Dumb Grudges In the Dumpster?

As indicated, the first step is to name them.

As indicated, the second step is to weigh them.

The third step is to get rid of them.

That’s the tricky part.

Forgiveness does not mean forgetting. Sometimes that happens easier because we have forgiven ourselves, our God or another.

Forgetting is dementia.

Today’s first reading and today’s gospel, tells us to love our enemies - because that saves eyes and energy - ourselves.

Reflecting on the smartness of not cherishing grudges - or holding onto them too tightly - is a good practice.

We see little kids walking around cherishing their teddy bears.

Lots of adults are walking around cherishing pet alligators of different sizes and shapes.

Mention someone’s name or some family situation and that alligator in their arms - jumps out of their mouth and into the conversation.

Go down to the swamp and let those alligators go.

Buddhists call them hot coals. As the Buddha said, “Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.”

So I’m saying here, “Throw them along with your alligators into the river or the swamp.”

Question: can the human mind let go.

Answer: sometimes yes and sometimes no.

I found something a Jesuit priest, Father James Gill, a psychiatrist, doctor, and priest, said a good 20 years ago to be very helpful.  He was giving us a workshop on stress. He quoted the work of a doctor in California who tells people who hate lines - especially long lines - to always pick the longest line when they go into a bank. Then when you get up to the front - get off that line - and go back and get on the longest line.

Then when you’re on that line, try to name all the names of all the kids you remember from your 8th grade - or senior class in high school - or what have you.

It works. I’m not a Type A driver or person, so I never minded what line I got into while driving up to toll booths. I never got E-ZPass - but I thank those who got them. They make the far right toll booth - my favorite - that much easier. Yet I’m reporting that I never minded lines - but a lot more after Jim Gill’s stuff about stress and lines or what have you.

Last week while waiting in the dentist’s office, I was going through all the air plane flights I’ve been on.

So tricks like that can help.

What I’m reporting here is to see the wisdom of  the mini-commandment about not cherishing grudges. That was in today’s first reading from Leviticus. Then there was the wisdom of Jesus about not getting anger and not getting even. Practicing these virtues can give us a greater freedom from grudges.

It’s what grudges do to us - for starters. That’s the best place to start.

As Malachy McCourt said, “Resentment is like taking poison and waiting for the other person to die.”

CONCLUSION

The title of my homily was, Cherish No Grudges.

And by the way you can do some of those tricks I mentioned about long lines during long sermons. 




ooooooo ------- ooooooo

Drawing on top: How to Draw the Grudge, DragoArt.com

Saturday, February 18, 2017

THE BIG TABLE

The whole world is seated
          at one big table,
          but the trouble is
          all the food
          is on one side

The whole world is seated
          at one big table,
          but the trouble is
          people have problems
          passing things.

The whole world is seated
          at one big table,
          but the trouble is
          people have difficulties
          stomaching each other.

The whole world is seated
          at one big table,
          but the trouble is
          the first are first
          and the last are last.

The whole world is seated
          at one big table,
          but the trouble is
          people don’t like
          the seating arrangements.

The whole world is seated
          at one big table,
          but the trouble is
          people seem to want
          separate tables.

The whole world is seated
          at one big table,
          but the trouble is
          nobody realizes
          the table is round.

The whole world is seated
          at one big table,
          but the trouble is
          the next generation
          is waiting for the leftovers.

THE RAFT

Somewhere out there in the deep waters
          is a raft
          called Love,
          called God.

And everybody knows it’s there,
          somewhere,
          as we all swim
          around in this ocean
          of words and stuff,
          trying to find the raft
          called Love,
          knowing that Love
          is the answer,
          as all the songs sing it,
          as all the prophets tell us.

And it’s hard work swimming and struggling
          and trying to find that raft
          called Love,
          called God.

And suddenly some of us
          spot the raft
          off there in the distance
          and as we swim closer
          we see it’s almost sinking
          with people.

Then God reaches out with his hands
          and pulls us up
          out of the water
          and onto the wood,
          and just then
          God suddenly laughs
          watching us trying
          to lug our wet possessions
          on board, too.

But then God starts to clap
          and slaps somebody
          on the back,
          who just then saw our stupidity
          and threw his stuff overboard,
          and once more
          there is just enough room,
          just enough space,
          on the raft
          called Love,
          called God. 
_____________________________________


P.S. I'm adding these two pieces from my book Listenings that goes back to the 1980's in case someone thinks I'm onto a 2017 agenda.
February 18, 2017


SANCTUARY  EARTH 

Centuries ago it was churches, places where someone
could run to,  for safety and to cry aloud, “Sanctuary!”

Next it was cities - some large cities where people
who were illegal - strangers - WOPS - “without papers” -
knew they could be safe - be with family and neighbors.
Oh, they were described by some as robbers and
rapists, but construction and landscape companies,
farmers, meat packing plants, restaurants and stores,  
they know who the workers are and how the economy goes.

Now there is a cry for colleges to be sanctuary
universe-cities - where kids brought here at 2 or 4
can be safe till they finish college - protected
by the Dream Act or DACA - and not be dragged
away immediately by I.C.E. into the cold dark night.

Question…. Prophetic challenge…. Gospel call….
When will we know this earth belongs to all of us?
It’s a sanctuary. It’s a holy place - to be open to all -
without walls - without borders -  without barriers.
Those are constructed with map lines, fences, walls,
words, languages, religions, cultures and colors.

Hello! Christ comes through walls and says, "Peace!"

Take off your shoes. Look down. You're on holy ground. 
Wash feet. Invite everyone to have a seat at the table.
And let the millionaires, billionaires and governments
learn that life is all about serving, not being served.

Sanctuary Earth! Isn’t that a great solution?
Sanctuary Earth! Isn’t that a great dream? 

Or do we need to keep on creating labels
as a way of creating strangers - to get self votes -
and a way to think we’re better than someone else?

When will we learn the real way on how  to be great?
Here's how: Christians stand there with a sign or a mirror
that says, “Matthew 25: 31-46” - but make sure
you have first made those words flesh in yourself and
then - who cares about you - make others great.


© Andy Costello, Reflections  2017

Footnotes:

This is a first draft document. It's choppy and clumsy, but I'll continue to sculpt it.

In the meanwhile, for starters,  one needs to know the history of the idea of sanctuary.

It's a holy place.  It's a safe place.  It's a place of protection.

In our story, it's our mother's womb - where we had a sanctuary for 9 months.

In a family it's the home. It's the kitchen table. It's the couch.  It's our mother and father's arms.

In a church it’s where the altar is - a place marked out by altar rails at times - or a place where a saint is buried - or where there are relics in the altar - making this a “holy place”. 

Every human being - [how about every animal?] - needs a safe place - where we are safe from the claws and fangs of horror stories.

Everyone needs safe havens.

Pause before entering.

In time people who needed safety headed for a sanctuary - in order to scream, "This is God's Holy Place - a sanctuary! Leave me alone. Let me be safe with God in this holy - wholesome place."

Next one ought to know the Biblical prophets and how they saw people and how all people need to be treated.

"Sow integrity for yourselves, reap a harvest of kindness...." -  Hosea 10:12

Listen to Isaiah 10: 1 - 4:, "Woe to legislators of infamous laws, to those who issue tyrannical decrees, who refuse justice to the unfortunate and cheat the poor among my people of their rights, who make widows their prey and rob the orphan. What will you do on the day of punishment, when, from far off, destruction comes?  To whom will you run for help?  Where will you leave your riches? Nothing for it but to crouch with the captives and to fall with the slain. Yet his anger is not spent, still his hand is raised to strike."

Read Isaiah 61: 1-3, as Jesus read it,    "The spirit of the Lord Yahweh has been give to me, for Yahweh has anointed me. He has sent me to bring good news to the poor, to bind up hearts that are broken; to proclaim liberty to captives, freedom to those in prison; to proclaim a year of favor from Yahweh, a day of vengeance for our God, to comfort all those who mourn and to give them for ashes a garland; for mourning robe the oil of gladness, for despondency, praise. They are to be called 'terebinths of integrity, planted by Yahweh to glorify him."[Cf.  Luke  4:18-19.]

Jeremiah 7:4-11 proclaims,  "Don't put your trust in illusions and say, 'The Temple of the Lord, the Temple of the Lord are these [buildings].' No, if you really mend your ways and your actions; if you execute justice between one another; if you do not oppress the stranger, the orphan, and the widow; if you do not shed the blood of the innocent in this place; if you do not follow other gods, to your own hurt - then only will I let you dwell in this place, in the land that I gave to your fathers for all time. See, you are relying on illusions that are of no avail. Will you steal and murder and commit adultery and swear falsely, and sacrifice to Baal, and follow other gods whom you have not experienced, and then come and stand before Me in this House which bears my name and say, 'We are safe'? [Safe] to do all these abhorrent things! Do you consider this House, which bears My name, to be a den of thieves?  As for Me, I have been watching - declares the Lord."

So one must know the prophets  who challenge us to treat others right and just and fair. 

So anyone who glories in the title, "Evangelical" - or "Christian" or "minister" or "priest" or "Catholic" or "Biblical" - anyone who builds their life on the prophets and on Jesus - please know and live what's between the covers of the Bible.

So anyone who puts their hand on a Bible better know what they are touching. The Book is filled with fire and justice and warning. Shouts of “Shame, shame, on you!” come screaming out of the Book towards anyone who touches it while being sworn in - if they are not swearing they are going to go by the Book and protect the inalienable rights of all people.

Remember walls fall. Read Psalm 18: 29-30 ".... with my God I can scale a wall...."  

Read Robert Frost's poem, Mending Wall. Remember how it begins, "Something there is that doesn't love a wall, / That sends the frozen-ground-swell under it, / And spills the upper boulders in the sun; / And makes gaps even two can pass abreast."  I hope more than 2  can fit through - whatever language they are speaking! And I also know what  the last line of Robert Frost's  poem is, "Good fences make good neighbors."

Which line is you: opening or closing?

Let's make the words - the 1883 sonnet  of  Emma Lazarus [1849-1887] on the foundation stone of the Statue of Liberty become flesh - and not just be bronze.



THE NEW COLOSSUS


Not like the brazen giant of Greek fame,
With conquering limbs astride from land to land;
Here at our sea-washed, sunset gates shall stand
A mighty woman with a torch, whose flame
Is the imprisoned lightning, and her name
MOTHER OF EXILES. From her beacon-hand
Glows world-wide welcome; her mild eyes command
The air-bridged harbor that twin cities frame.

"Keep, ancient lands, your storied pomp!" cries she
With silent lips. "Give me your tired, your poor,
Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free,
The wretched refuse of your teeming shore.
Send these, the homeless, tempest-tossed  to me,
I lift my lamp beside the golden door!"

Let's continue to make the United States a sanctuary ... or to quote John Winthrop the Puritan, Ronald Reagan the President and Jesus the Prophet - that we be a city of light on a hill for all to see - and all to discover.

For the sake of transparency my parents were not born in the United States - but on Planet Earth. What are your roots? 

Let's work to make the world a sanctuary - the title of this piece - for all people.

Go to your local sanctuary and pray to make this a Better World.

For the sake of transparency I am a member of the Better World Movement.

For the sake of transparency I like to read Martin Luther King Jr's "I Have A Dream Speech" - on a regular basis.



The title of this piece is Sanctuary Earth.

Then there are bird sanctuaries - protected places for saving precious animals.  

In English law and tradition a sanctuary was a place of safety and asylum from the 4th to the 17th century.

In the United States 440 cities were declared sanctuary cities from 1980 to 2000 for people caught in the Central America Civil Wars.

As to the United States - people have to know we are a nation of immigrants. 

I want to here cite a note about WOP - which I mention above.  There are various anecdotes about it's meaning.  It is said to have been based on the Southern Italian word "guappo" meaning pimp or thug. That is supposed to have come from the Spanish word "guapo" meaning handsome. That is said to have derived from a word for pimp and on and on an on. Some said it stands for "Without Passport" or "Without papers" or "working on pavement".

I would like it to stand for, "Work On Peace!"

There is a need to continue to talk together in a sacred place - about all this. And walls don't help when it comes to talking - but then again - it was behind walls and in a locked upper room, where Pentecost burst Christianity on its feet.

Friday, February 17, 2017

February 17, 2017



READING

Is reading me?

As they say, the 3 r’s: reading ‘riting, ‘rithmetic….

Is there a book in me - a biography, a novel,
a book of poems, a textbook, an autobiography?

Has there been a book that changed my life?

What was the last book that I couldn’t put down?

Can anyone tell me by my cover?

If I were a book, what would be my title?

Who are the people on my pages?

What have been the chapters of my life?

How many more pages and chapters are to come?

Who would want to hear my story?

Who's story do I want to hear?

Is reading me?



© Andy Costello, Reflections  2017

Thursday, February 16, 2017

February 16, 2017

SPORTS

Is sports me?

Am I reruns of a home run or a great
catch or a race I didn’t think I could win?

Am I a couch potato who sat and watched
too many games - when I could have been
out there walking, running or riding a bike?

Am I most me when I’m wearing a jersey
or a t-shirt or a cap advertising my team -
trying to ride their glory and I want a title?

When I’m running the human race, do I have
St. Paul’s vision of life: Christ as my goal? [1]
Do I follow St. Irenaeus’ words, “The glory of
God is when we are fully alive and human life
is the vision of God?” [2]

Is sports me?


© Andy Costello, Reflections  2017

[1] St. Paul, 2:Timothy 4: 7-8


[2]  St. Irenaeus,  "The glory of God is man fully alive, and the life of man is the vision of God….” AH IV, 20, 7.