HOW  MANY  TIMES 

HAVE  YOU  BEEN  REBORN? 

INTRODUCTION

The title of my homily is, “How Many Times Have You Been Reborn?”

That’s a question that hit me when I read today’s gospel from John 3:1-8.

We’ve all heard the word, “reborn” or “born again” and when it shows up in Christian conversations,   it’s from the gospel of John.

Nicodemus is told by Jesus that he has to be born again from above - otherwise he cannot see the Kingdom of God.

NEW YORK TIMES

Most mornings I usually glance through the New York Times which we get - to see what’s happening around the world.

This morning I noticed on page 3 for today, Monday, April 24, 2017,  the following:  

“To Stay Married, Embrace Change

In her Modern Love column, Ada Calhoun urges readers not to get caught up in the ‘end of history’ illusion - the belief that a spouse’s personality and habits solidify at the moment of marriage.  Partners are people, and people change, she argues, a perspective that the married members of the audiences applauded.

I then tracked down the column from last Friday, April 21^st, where that comment was made. It was very interesting, scary, challenging, and thought provoking.  And not only was there an article to read, but there were 281 comments as well.”

People who were married 50, 47, 37, 6, 16 years wrote in their comments.

People who were divorced wrote in comments.

Putting both together,  I ask the question I started with, “How Many Times Have You Been Reborn.”

I was ordained a priest with 15 other guys. 9 left the priesthood. 2 came back - one to the Redemptorists and one became a diocesan priest.

I know of one who was married and divorced and remarried.

I don’t know if they would use the language of being reborn or what have you.

THE GOAL OF A  HOMILY

I see a homily - especially on a weekday - having one key thought - or one key question.

I don’t see any of us able to answer the question, if a question is presented, during the Mass or at the moment. However, I would think that it’s a good homily if something hits a person there and then and they continue processing what hit them well after the Mass is over.

For example, I preached 3 times yesterday - on the question of forgiveness - especially a person dealing with life mistakes - or sins - or hurts - in the upper room of one’s mind - more than in the confession box in a church.

After the 5:30 a man - never noticed him before - came up to me in the crowd of people leaving Mass - and said to me something like, “You said something that I have been wrestling with all my life - and I never thought about it - the way you talked about it this evening.”

Then someone else jumped in - and then another - and then another - and then we went out to dinner at Macaroni Grill - and at 10:30 last night - while watching a baseball game - I was sitting there - thinking about what that man - whoever he was  -  what he said. And I thought and prayed - I hope I see him again. I hope he was challenged and is processing what hit him or what have you.

Did what I said,  help him?

Will it lead to a life change?

I don’t know.

MY LIFE

But each of us can go inside our  upper room - out mind. That’s the metaphor and the reality in yesterday’s gospel. We can walk around inside our head and look at our  life.

Change. Rebirth. A new me….

We can divorce other people.  Can we divorce ourselves?

Am I the same me that I was at 7 years old?

Do we ever harden like cement?

Do we change?

Do people change dramatically or do people change slowly - like the paint on the walls of our homes?

Who judges?

A family member - who hadn’t seen me in a long time once said, “You’ve changed!”

There were dozens of meetings at that occasion - a wedding, a funeral, or a family get together, I’m not sure what the occasion was, but that was the only conversation or comment from that day that I remembered.

Dumb me - didn’t ask - and I still haven’t asked what this family member meant.

As priest she had a chance to see me up front - on stage - so I wondered if that triggered her comment.

I don’t know.

I assume that we are the best person to make the judgment - but with help from others.

I also assume that geographical changes can bring about changes in us.

What else? 

How about deaths, divorces, loss of jobs, retirements….

I remember hearing in a talk about the essential self, the nuclear self, the central self, that changes less than other self-stuff.

I am still wondering about that.

I know that I know more now that I knew 10, 20, 30 years ago.

I know that I don’t want to become cold and crusty - and be a selfie - that can be selfish and self-centered.

I know,  I want to be better not worse.

I know, I need to read, study, be self-reflective.

I know,  I have to shut up, take long walks, drive with the car radio off - and dig into stuff I need to dig into more.

CONCLUSION

The title of my homily was, “How Many Times Have I Been Reborn?”

For some reason I have always liked the number 5 - I have 5 fingers and 5 ties - so that’s a manageable number. So I’m going to work on coming up with 5 rebirths.

Your turn - your take - on this topic and theme and question.