ANGER BUTTONS

INTRODUCTION

The title of homily is, “Anger Buttons.”

There are machines that exist right now that can tell a lot about our brain – but 100 years from now imagine a machine that will be able to look at a section of our brain where we have all kinds of buttons. And these brain researchers will begin to put labels on our buttons:
· Pleasure Button,
· Fear Button,
· Hunger Button,
· Thirsty Button,
· Escape Button,
· Comfort Button,
· Envy Button,
· Jealousy Button,
· Anger Button.

In this homily, I want to talk about the Anger Button.

TODAY’S GOSPEL

In today’s gospel Jesus walked into the temple and wow did he get angry at what he saw.

It would be like parents leaving their 17 year old in charge of the house for a weekend – with strict orders of “No parties”, “No going out!” “We trust you to watch your brother and sister aged 13 and 11.” It was mom and dad’s 20th wedding anniversary and they wanted to have a weekend alone together in New York City. Around 4 PM on Saturday afternoon they get a cell phone call in New York that dad’s sister in Virginia got sick and had to be hospitalized, so they headed back home, with the idea of driving to the hospital in Virginia on Sunday morning. Coming up to their house around 9:30 PM, they saw lots of cars and what looked like a big time party going on inside.

They walked in. Seeing the booze and this and that, they became furious and threw all the other kids out of their house.

In today’s gospel Jesus comes into the temple and sees the buying and the selling and the sheep and the oxen and the doves and he becomes furious. He makes a whip out of cords and drives everyone and everything out of the temple. He overturned the moneychangers’ tables yelling, “Stop making my Father’s house a marketplace!”

And we’ve heard dozens of sermons that make the point that there is such a thing as just anger – because here is a case where Jesus got angry. Or the preacher makes the point that Jesus is not always meek and quiet.

I remember a single mother telling me every 5 years or so in raising her 5 kids she would destroy a whole set of expensive dishes – throwing them one by one or in bunches against the walls – smashing them on the floor. She added, “It scared the devil out of them and they knew who was boss for about six months.” She added, “It was well worth the price of the dishes!”

She’s dead now – but I’m sure her kids with a smile on their faces love to tell the story about their mom – way back when. I wonder if any of those 5 kids do the same with their kids and dishes from time to time.

I just spent 4 days on retreat with some of our junior high school kids, senior leaders and other adults – and once more I can say, “Parenting has to be a very rewarding, as well as a very tough job.”

WHAT GETS YOU ANGRY?

Imagine if those researchers who find this part of the brain where our buttons are – find out that there is also a deeper section under each button that has further buttons – like anger over fairness, or traffic, or injustice, or phoniness, or long sermons, or cold food, or drunk drivers or on how people vote or about dog poop that is not cleaned up. They find out that there are lots of little buttons there – and these specific anger buttons vary from person to person.

TODAY’S FIRST READING

Today’s first reading from the Book of Exodus lists not only the 10 commandments – but several other commandments as well.

Rules and regulations, commandments and laws, are the result of people getting together to put down on paper or stone – what they want and don’t want.

Parents when they settle down after discovering their kids had an unauthorized party while they were away, will say something like this, “When we put you in charge of the house and in charge of your younger brother and sister, we expected you to obey our commandment and not have a party when we are away. We have entrusted to you to take care of your brother and sister and our home. The police could have shown up instead of us. The neighbors might have called. There could be an accident or a lawsuit.”

Rules and regulations, commandments and laws, are often the Golden Rule spelled out more specifically. We don’t want someone trying to cheat with our spouse, so we better not cheat with someone else’s spouse. We wouldn’t want someone stealing our wallet or laptop or garden hose, so we better not steal someone else’s property. We wouldn’t want someone telling lies or bearing false witness against us, so we better not talk about our neighbor’s dirty laundry or rumors or spread our conjectures on what’s going on next door.

ANGER: 10 QUESTIONS

Anger is a good topic and issue to reflect upon during Lent. Here are ten questions:

1. What are my buttons? What bugs me? What bothers me?
2. Do I have a long or a short fuse?
3. What are my values? – Looking at my anger – revisiting the angry moments of my life can tell me what my values are.
4. Am I a lion at home and a lamb outside the house?
5. What should I be angry about and I’m not?
6. Am I holding an anger or resentment against someone for years? Who is it? What is it? Is it worth looking at or letting it sit. There is that old saying, “Let sleeping dogs lie.”
7. Am I aware of someone who is angry at me for something I did wrong from way back? Would that box be worth opening – or would it be a Pandora’s Box?
8. Do I see God angry and is God angry with anything about me?
9. Have I ever had a good discussion with my spouse or family or others about anger – what bugs each of us around the house or what have you – how we handle anger, how we see others handling anger, etc.?
10. Do I know someone who is always angry? What’s with them?

CONCLUSION: SOME BOTTOM LINES

Here are a few first draft conclusions about anger:

There are some things we should get angry about and there are some things we shouldn’t get angry about.

Communication skills help. For example, changing pronouns from “you” to “I” can help at times. Instead of yelling, “You are driving me crazy!”, say, “I go crazy at times when we’re supposed to be somewhere at 7 P.M. and I’m standing at the door or the car waiting and waiting and waiting and waiting and waiting and we get to the meeting or the movie or the Smith house 20 minutes late every time.”

Specific complaints are better than general complaints. For example, instead of saying, “You’re making me nervous!” say something like, “I get nervous when we speed up and rush to get almost on top of the car in front of us and we have to brake every time – whereas other drivers seem to calmly let cars have 3 to 4 to 5 car lengths between each car if possible.” In other words, there are type A drivers and type B drivers and type A drivers have to get new brakes much sooner than type B drivers.

Then there is today’s second reading from 1st Corinthians which has a powerful statement that should intrigue all of us. St. Paul talks about Christ as God – showing us the power and wisdom of God. God’s wisdom is interesting. The all powerful God is crucified on a cross. This is a stumbling block to the Jews who wanted God to wipe out all enemies. This is foolishness to the Gentiles who are being told about a God who dies on a cross. Then Paul says, “the foolishness of God is wiser than human wisdom, and the weakness of God is stronger than human strength.”

Today we Redemptorists celebrate the life of one of our saints, St. Clement Hofbauer [1751-1820]. The story we always heard was about the time he went into a tavern looking for money for his orphans – and a guy seeing this priest enter the pub spits in his face and made fun of him. Clement responded by saying, “That’s for me. How about something for my orphans?” And wow did that work. His hat was filled with money.

Maybe the strongest person is the person who shuts up and takes it all – like Jesus who was spit at when scourged and then killed on a cross – but in the meanwhile – sometimes we better scream when the Church has become a marketplace or our kids might be ruining themselves and our home – or when someone is driving while drunk or very dangerously.

Timing is everything. Wisdom is long in coming! Lent is a good time to be in God’s house to consider and reconsider these serious issues. Amen.