DON’T FORGET THE ADJECTIVES
INTRODUCTION
The title of my homily for this 24 Tuesday in Ordinary
Time is, “Expectations: Don’t Forget the Adjectives.”
Today’s first reading from the First Letter of St. Paul
to Timothy has a whole list of expectations for bishops, deacons, and women.
Check out 1 Timothy 3:1-13.
Presbyters aren’t mentioned. Moreover, we’re dealing here with the Early
Church as they are slowly getting organized. In the gospels we hear about Jesus' followers being called disciples
and apostles - then other titles and positions evolved.
EXPECTATIONS
FOR BISHOPS
Bishops are to be trustworthy, irreproachable, married
only once, temperate, self-controlled, decent, hospitable, able to teach, not a
drunkard, not aggressive, gentle, not contentious, not a lover of money. They need to be able to manage their own household and keep their kids under control. They are not to be a recent convert,
nor conceited, but to have a good reputation among outsiders.
What qualifications would you have on your list?
Everyone has expectations about others.
Want to know what yours are for waitresses, other drivers,
ushers, priests, spouses? Answer: simply jot down what you get angry about?
EXPECTATIONS
FOR DEACONS
Dignified, not deceitful, not addicted to drink, not
greedy, holds the faith, has a clear conscience. They are to only to be married once - as well as manage
their own homes well.
EXPECTATIONS
FOR WOMEN
Dignified, not slanderers, temperate, faithful in
everything.
ADJECTIVES
When I used to run workshops for church leaders,
parishes, organizations, we taught people to use adjectives.
For example some adjectives would be: realistic,
unrealistic, stated, unstated, possible, impossible.
Name a role like leader or teacher or priest and then jot
down expectations for them. For example: pastor. Next add your expectations you
have of them. Like: never mentions
money. Is available 24/7/365. Then put
an adjective like unrealistic or
possible in front of that expectation. For example, looking at today’s gospel, “can
raise the dead”. Write in front of that expectation: “impossible”.
We have two new priests here. When people hear that, immediately,
expectations kick in. It’s the same when we get a new pastor, bishop, deacon,
or who have you. It’s the same when your son or daughter wants you to meet
someone they are interested in.
Expectations are expected.
So put down expectations for each role or position and
then put an adjective in front of that expectation.
In a really small organization - or team - or council - that has worked together a lot - you could
even put down each member’s name and put expectations in front of each name -
and then adjectives in front of each expectation. Warning: trust and understanding better be at a high level for such a process.
OTHER FACTORS
Any of you who have taken the Myers-Briggs personality test
know that if a person is highly organized, very neat, always on time, perfectly
dressed, they are less apt to be imaginative or creative. I can say that from experience, because I am
a slob - and the adjective I’d put in front of slob would be, “typical”.
Everyone who makes someone bishop or pastor, knows two
things: not everyone has all the gifts and secondly, you have to deal with the players on
the team that you have. The pool is only
so deep and so wide and these are the only people in or around the pool.
Too many people play fantasy parish, priest, spouse,
neighbor, church ….
Everyone wants superstars. Sorry there are not that many
around.
Next there are scales: on a scale of 1 to 10, 10 being
the best, how is this candidate when it comes to running a parish or a meeting
or teaching or preaching - or being social, listening, etc. etc. etc.?
Next comes my question: can people change? Can people
learn? Can we come up with new ways of running the ship? Can we really tell
another that they don’t have it and they need to improve - but can anyone
change over 70, 60, 50, 40, 30? Each of
us has to ask: have I ever changed? Have I been basic me all my life?
If I have changed, mellowed, grown, how did that happen?
What triggered it, etc., etc., etc.
Years ago I remember being in a parish near Rochester NY,
where I noticed the pastor hired this wonderful guy who could do books, plow
snow, solve maintenance problems, etc. etc. etc. This left the pastor to do
personal stuff - like visiting the sick and the homebound - and work on his
homilies.
LOOKING AHEAD
For the 8 ½ years before coming to Annapolis, I was in a
different parish every week for about 20 to 25 weeks of the year. I saw a lot -
and it gives me I think some experience in some of these expectation issues.
My
number one adjective - for many expectations - sorry to say - is “Unrealistic.”
And I think of myself as an optimist.
Pope Francis is calling on the church to have bishops who
smell like sheep, get down there in the sweat and dirt of daily life - to be
compassionate more than bosses. Those who want a church to slam and shame
sinners, you’d get a disagreeable adjective from me. Sorry ….
CONCLUSION
I’m a Luke 15 Catholic.
How’s that for a button or bumper sticker?
I’m a Luke 15 Catholic.
