LEADERSHIP:
3 POINTS
INTRODUCTION
The title of my talk is, “Leadership: 3 Points.”
I have given a talk on leadership at this COSA ceremony
at the beginning of another St. Mary’s High School year - every year now for
the last 14 years.
Thank you for this opportunity to think about this topic
of leadership again.
At 77 years of age - I would guess that I still have a
few words about this topic.
So I sat down and listed 10 possibilities. Then I picked
3.
I’ll save the other points for another year.
POINT NUMBER
ONE: ASK QUESTIONS - FOR EXAMPLE?
A leader asks questions.
A leader listens for the questions people have.
A leader has to address his or her own questions about
leadership.
A leader is often expected to give answers. I prefer to
stress questions before answers.
And I think the # 1 question to ask is, “For example?”
Asking that question gets the other person to think. It
gets them to be more specific. The for example question forces clarity.
For example what are the specific issues we need to
address when we talk about leadership? Give me some examples.
So leaders ask other people questions - more than giving
answers. and the number one question to ask is, “For example?”
I would think that example speaks louder than words - in
fact, words to me are reflections and thoughts after the fact - after
experiencing some example.
Looking forward, some of you will become coaches and captains
of teams and for starters you will imitate the example of those you saw on the
teams you were on.
Looking forward, some of you will be in organizations in
this school - and future schools.
For
example, some of you will experience COSA here at St. Mary’s. Those on COSA
will influence you - in what you do and what you don’t do - how you saw people
lead and not lead - how someone ran a meeting well or not so well. And what you
will learn are the examples you liked and didn’t like.
Looking forwards, most of you will become parents,
leading kids into the future, and you will do parenting the way you saw your
parents do parenting. There will be things your parents did that you won’t do.
“For example?”
“For example?” is a great life question - to ask it a
good 10,000 times before you die.
When someone is complaining - when someone is accusing you
of something, ask - say, “For example?”
Let me give one of my favorite examples. It’s How To Use
a Microphone.
COSA leaders - all leaders - learn how to speak loud and
clear when you stand up to speak up.
At different times in life, you will go to the microphone.
When I get a chance,
I like to tell anyone who will listen, “Here’s how I learned to use a
microphone.”
For example, someone says to you, “You were at the
microphone and it’s obvious, you don’t know how to use a microphone.”
So you answer back, “Sorry! So can you show me how to use
a microphone?” You’re asking, “For
example, what’s the best way to use a microphone.”
It’s then I say, “Make a fist. Then make a ‘Thumbs up.’
with that fist. Then put your thumb on your lips - still making a fist. Then
leaving your hand exactly as it is, fold
in your thumb.”
If you don’t know how to use a microphone, that’s
Lesson # 1. That’s how close you should
be to the microphone - if you’re not sure.
Next, I would say, “If one person here this morning heard
what I just said about how close you should be to a microphone - and puts it
into practice for the rest of your life, then I have been a leader. Then it was
worthwhile for me to come to this microphone to speak today.
I heard someone say and show that way to use a microphone
in the 1970’s and I have been practicing that
ever since when I use a microphone.
For example, I was at a meeting on Riva Road on Opioids
last Tuesday and I heard people yelling about 37 times to the people on stage,
“Not loud enough!”
They were too far from the microphone. They could not be heard. I was not in charge,
so I didn’t say anything, but if I was in charge, I would show them the fist,
thumb, to the mouth trick.
There are other tricks - but that’s one practical one.
The Fist and Thumb to the Lips example.
Leaders need to be heard. Speakers need to be heard.
Learn how to yell at speakers, “Louder!” The other day a bunch
of us were able to yell that out and some people got closer to the microphone.
Leaders need to be heard for starters.
SECOND POINT: THE
TASTE TEST
In your lifetime you will experience a lot of laziness,
craziness, people making comments that
are not thought out too well. People don’t prepare. People don’t to their
homework. To put it bluntly: In your lifetime you will experience a lot of
crap.
So my second suggestion for being a leader is that you
learn to use the taste test.
It goes like this.
A person is walking down the street. He or she stops.
They see something on the sidewalk. They go over to it and say, “It looks
like.”
They get down on their knees, bend over it and smell it.
“It smells like.” Then they take their finger and touch it and say, “It feels
like.” Then they taste it and they say, “Oooh. This is crap!” Then they say, “Good
thing I didn’t step in it.”
A leader knows crap when they see, smell, touch, taste and almost step in it.
For the rest of your life, you will experience people
feeding you a lot of crap - in dating, with regards drugs, in business
meetings, and especially regarding money.
People want your money and they will feed you a lot of
crap to get it.
Don’t fall for it - and you what it is. It rhymes with
it.
Remember you heard it
here - this second point about leadership.
THIRD POINT: BE
A GLOBALIST
There are two kinds of people, those who build walls and
those who build bridges.
I hold that good leaders build good bridges. I hold bad
leaders build walls.
I don’t know how much it will cost to build a new Bay
Bridge.
Ask those stuck on Route 50 on a Friday evening - as they
inch their way forward so that they can cross the Bay Bridge - into Eastern
Maryland or on Sunday night when they are coming home - whether they would want
money spent on a bridge or a wall.
As priest - I know one of the key jobs for a priest is to
build bridges.
As priest I know that the New Testament word for priest
and pope is pontifex - meaning bridge.
I love Michelangelo’s painting on the ceiling of the
Sistine Chapel in Rome. It has God reaching out his finger to touch Adam’s
finger. It then shows Adam pointing his
finger to touch God’s finger. It’s two fingers trying to bridge the distance
between two people.
Notice God’s hand is not a fist.
If there is one thing I see happening around the world,
it’s this call to be nationalists - isolationists - to build walls that
separate people from people. It’s this urge to wall out people.
It’s this tendency to make fists - instead of open hands;
to shake a fist at another instead of making an open hand to shake a deal with
each other.
I see it in groups. People want to isolate and insulate each
other from each other - to push away and bully people we don’t like.
A leader notices hands when with others.
It’s happening right now on the border between Myramar
and Bangladesh. There is a group of people who are labeled the Myramar
Rohingyas. They are Muslim. They are also labeled “the most friendless people
in the world.” 300 to 400 thousand are trying to migrate and move - trying to
find a place to live. Hindus and Buddhists, and other Moslems are giving this
group of Muslims a tough time to find a place to exist.
If there is one thing in the world that is happening in
the last 20 years it’s migration.
What’s your position on people coming into America? Wall
them out or invite them in?
If there is one thing that’s happening in our world, it’s
this brownification of peoples. Take the subway when you're in New York City or Toronto and look around at the color of the skin of the people traveling on faceship earth with you. People are migrating. People are marrying. People are having multi-cultural babies. We are becoming one world - whether we like it or not.
For the sake of transparency I grew up within eye sight
of the Statue of Liberty and its plaque invites the world’s tired and poor to
come to America and join us. Listen
again to what that Statue says, “Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled
masses yearning to breathe free, the wretched refuse of your teeming shore,
send these the homeless, tempest tost,
to all. I lift my flame beside the golden door.”
That is part of my
Christian outlook on life.
It’s everyone’s earth.
All are welcome.
For the sake of transparency my parents came to America
from another county - speaking both English and Gaelic. My parents had little
education. My parents did what many people who come to America did. They earned
money and sent it back home to pay for their brothers and sisters to come to
America - as well as to feed those back home.
I’m 77. You’re 17 and younger. Lucky you: because you’re
going to be seeing the world’s borders crumbling a lot more than ever in the
next 50 years.
That means there will be pushback - and screams about
immigration.
People are going to want more and more walls - so that
what they perceive as their land and their stuff - it will be protected.
Christians forget the Resurrection story - where God
comes through walls.
So leaders have as one of their 3 key points: All are
welcome.
I would hope that COSA leaders here in St. Mary’s would
be highly in favor of no walls - no cliques - no isolating the different that
who I am.
CONCLUSION
Let me close with a quote about leadership - that touches on my
3 points for this morning: “A little old lady was refused a hearing by
Alexander the Great. She spoke up and reprimanded him saying, `If you have no
time for the little person as well as the big, you have no time to be
King.’”
