CI INDEX:
COMPARISONS AND IMITATION
INTRODUCTION
The title of my homily for the 13th Sunday in
Ordinary Time, Year C, is, “CI Index:
Comparisons and Imitation.”
Comparisons and Imitations: two major issues in life.
Comparing ourselves to others …. Imitating others ….
I’m willing to bet - by mentioning - that we all have a CI
Index, someone would say, “I heard of that. What’s that all about again - one’s
CI Index?”
And I would say, “I just made that up. As far as I know
there is no such thing as one’s CI
Index.”
In coming up with sermons, I read the readings and see where they take me
in exploring areas and avenues for spiritual growth. Today’s readings triggered
for me the issues of comparisons and imitation - C I.
CI INDEX
So there is something called one’s C I Index - because
I’m making one up now for this homily.
It goes like this.
Write down 5 people you have compared yourself to? And write down the names of 5 people you have
imitated.
That’s it. Index them. List them. Name them.
Then looking at those 10 names - what does each person
tell you about yourself. There can be
duplicates - the same name on both lists - and if there are - then those
duplicate names get more weight - and hopefully more consideration - what they
are telling you about yourself.
In doing this, I would also hope, one begins to think about people we don’t want to
be like - people we don’t want to imitate. That information, that realization,
would also help us to understand ourselves and our life and our interaction
with each other better.
TODAY’S
READINGS
So the idea for this homily comes from today’s readings.
At least that’s how I’m justifying it - in case this
sermon is a bomb.
In the first reading Elisha the prophet follows Elijah
the prophet. [1 Kings 19: 16b, 19-21]
Reading the Books of Kings we’ll find out how Elisha
imitates Elijah and we also find out how both differ from the false prophets of
Baal and other religions.
So there they are: comparisons and imitations.
In the second reading - [Galatians 5:1, 13-18] - we have
stuff from Paul the apostle - who became who he became - first by being an
imitator of the Pharisees and religious fanatics - and righteous religious
folks. That was his first life - when he was Saul.
Then that didn’t work - because he was killing and
persecuting others -Christians - as well as his own spirit in the process.
In doing that, he fell on his face.
In time, he realizes he was blind. He hears a voice from Christ who says, “You’re killing me - by
killing my disciples.”
Then this Christ says to Paul that he can raise this Paul
from his chaos - and his deadly way of doing life.
Then when Paul started to become a Christian, he realized by comparisons that he differed
from other Christians.
He realized that he differed from Peter - and then
challenged Peter.
Paul changed - but in our conversions and changes - we
bring our baggage and our brains with us.
Eureka - this is how life works.
We compare ourselves to our brothers and sisters - to
other kids in the classroom and on the playground. We imitate the other folks.
That’s how we learn to speak and to eat.
I saw this loud and clear last week at the Vacation Bible. Moms or
grandparents would come in around 10 to 12 to pick up their kids - but a show
would be going on - kids singing and dancing - and their little brothers and
sisters would be watching and some would start imitating what they were seeing.
Comparisons and imitation…. Watch little kids come up the
line with their parents for communion. Little two year olders reach out for
communion or say, “I want some!”
If we want to make our life work - and become better and
better - we need to check out our baggage and our brains, our patterns and our
ways to doing things. Whom are we imitating? We learn from comparisons - and we learn from
those whom we interact with - bump into
- do life with. Life contains a lot of déjà vu.
THIS HOMILY -
SO FAR VAGUE - BUT TRYING TO BECOME SPECIFIC
I’ve heard mothers say, “When I started to have kids, I
realized I didn’t know how to be a mother.”
“Sorry, I guess I wasn’t watching my mother when she was
mothering.”
I didn’t get that at first, but I heard it enough to
start thinking about it.
Then a mom would say to me, “I watched my sister-in-law -
how she was as a mother and I realized some tricks of the trade. I tried
imitating what I liked she was doing and some of the tricks worked.
Others said they saw some moms and by comparison - they
said to themselves, “I know I don’t want to be like that.”
Then some said, “Kids are different! You gotta know that
and try different tricks of the trade.”
To be honest I didn’t hear this enough from dads - on
questions of how to be a dad.
Then I realized I was doing the same as priest. I watched
how some priests preached and how some dealt with people. I watched how some
priests and other people treated parishioners or waiters and waitresses at
restaurants and I saw what I liked and what I didn’t like.
Surprise! I was learning by comparison and Imitation or
non-Imitation on how to be a Christian and a good human being and how to avoid the opposite.
My second rector was a Father Joseph McManus - buried in
our back yard at St. Mary’s on Duke of Gloucester Street. I like to go to his
grave from time to time and say, “Thank you, Joe for all that you taught me.
And thank you for being such a good priest.” He was my boss in San Alfonso
Retreat House, Long Branch New Jersey. He was very different from my first boss
- in my first assignment, Most Holy Redeemer, New York City - Lower East Side.
G. was good, but he could be gruff - and
I wiggled my jaw back and forth at times seeing that. Where did I learn that
trick from - shifting my lower jaw - when I don’t like? Was I imitating
someone? I haven’t figured that one out yet.
One time G’s brother said to me, “How’s my brother doing
as your boss?” I paused and said
something. Then his brother said the following about his brother the priest.
“Let me tell you something about G. He has a tough personality and we always
said that he made the most of a bad personality - when he became a priest.” That was helpful - very helpful - and I
became a lot less hard on him.
I learned from Joe, the second guy, some positive tricks
of the trade.
For example, “When you get a new assignment, keep your
mouth shut and don’t try to make any changes for at least a year and a day.”
I’ve noticed that some new bosses and new people try to
make changes immediately - maybe to prove to others they have arrived and they
are in charge or have talents or what have you.
I don’t know which is the better path, but by comparison
and imitation - I know I have learned what I have learned. I prefer the wait
and see model.
I think of this when it comes to re-marriages and being a
step-parent. “Do I speak up or step back or what have you - till I have earned
my presence around here?”
I think of this when a teacher is hired in a new school
or how a teacher does his or her first day and first week of school.
I assume this is an issue with a new coach or manager or
public official.
I assume both have their merits - and each of us has to
be our best. I’m only saying that awareness of what we’re doing is a key
reality.
Joe also taught me that on hospital calls, it’s the
people around the bed -who are more important than the person in the bed. Those
are the ones he was very concerned about.
Other priests don’t see it like that. So….
OKAY, IS THAT
ENOUGH?
I got to this point in my homily and thought I asked some
key questions.
Was this popcorn?
Was this stuff for the people in the benches today or for the person in
the pulpit?
It was for you, if
during this homily you are sitting here thinking about who the key people in
your life are - and how they taught you by rubbing off on you - or rubbing you
the wrong way.
It was for you, if you are sitting here thinking about
people in your life, whom you know - whom you wanted to be like or didn’t want
to be like.
If was for you, if you are sitting here realizing you’ve
been like Saint Paul whom we hear almost every Sabbath in a second reading.
You’ve changed in life. You’ve learned in life. You were tough and then you
became more tender. You learned that
Paul figured out it’s very simple: even though we sometimes have a milk can
full of snakes in our soul - we can be hissing within too, too often - biting
each other, and that can poison us - but we realized this doesn’t have to
continue. Today he told us, “For the whole law is fulfilled in one statement, namely,
‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’”
It was for you, if you learned from Jesus that he - like Paul - is calling us to follow him,
imitate us, and enough with the excuses - like one of these days - or I’m still
dealing with the death of my father or my mother - or a loved one. Instead put
your hand to the plow and plant the kingdom of God where your standing - where
you are. [Cf. today’s gospel: Luke 9:51-62]
CONCLUSION
The title of my homily is, “CI Index: Comparisons and
Imitation.”
This week - if you take the time to jot down 5 people
whom you compare yourself to - brother, sister, co-worker, neighbor, boss,
public figure, then if you index them, you can come up with some good
information - on how you got to be who you are so far.
This week, if you
take the time to index 5 people whom you are imitating or definitely not
imitating, you also have some information for your consideration and prayer or
what have you. If you are married, and you do this kind of stuff with your
spouse, go for it.