Wednesday, March 25, 2009

THE GRACE I NEED

Lord, show me the grace
I need. Is patience the key?
Or is it faith? What about courage?
Generosity? Humility?
Do I need to laugh more?
Is it forgiving so and so?
Do I have a long or short fuse?
Is my timing off?
Is it listening more and talking less?
Is it my many sins of omission,
not giving of my time and gifts to others?
Is it Stick-to-it-tiveness?
What is the grace I need?
And P.S. Lord. Please hurry!
I tend to be very impatient!



© Andy Costello, Prayers, 2009

ANNUNCIATION


God’s what if’s
like a shoe in the door,
like a “Wait a minute!”,
like a cell phone call,
happen when least expected.
Mary asked questions,
then said, “Yes!”

I say, “No!”

I don’t want
to even hear my fear
that I too am asked to bring
Christ to the stable, the road,
the temple, the crowd,
the upper room, the garden,
and then the way to the Cross.



© Andy Costello, Reflections, 2009

Sunday, March 22, 2009


WHAT’S KILLING YOU


INTRODUCTION

The title of my homily is, “What’s Killing You?

THE SNAKE ON THE POLE

The background for today’s gospel is from the Book of Numbers, Chapter 21 – when the Israelites were going through their 40 year “Desert Period” trying to get to the Promised Land. One of the problems they had was snakes whose bite was killing folks. God tells Moses, “Take a snake. Put it up on a pole. Tell the people, ‘If anyone is bitten by one of these snakes and looks at it, he or she will live.’” So Moses makes a bronzed serpent and puts it up on the pole.

Sound familiar? The bronzed serpent on the pole becomes one of the symbols of the Medical Profession.

The interpretation I like best is that there has to be people around who tell us, “This is what’s killing you. Face the problem and you can be healed.”

What’s killing us?

Every individual, every marriage, every family, every company, every country, our planet, has to ask that question? “What’s killing us?”

Right now this country and our world is in an economic mess. People keep losing their jobs and finding a job is very difficult. As politicians, reporters, as well as the little guy and gal are blaming banks and the overinflated housing prices and credit card debt and the war – and many other things as the source of our problems, hopefully various prophets amongst us will stand up and say, “This is what’s killing us?”

I am not an economist – but I assume one of our problems is spending beyond our means – as well as greed – as well as dependency on oil – as well as a half dozen other things. I also know people have to spend to make the economy work. So at times I follow a statement from the Talmud, “Teach thy tongue to say, ‘I do not know!’”

So I don’t know. In fact, the ability to say, “I don’t know!” is a great learning in life – as well as the ability to say, “I made a mistake.” or “I was wrong!” The opposite, not being able to say, “I don’t know” or “I made a mistake” or “I was wrong” can be what is killing us or draining us.

AT THE LOCAL LEVEL

There are global problems and local problems. Using Tip O’Neil’s comment about politics, we can say, “All problems are local problems.”

So it helps to ask at the local level – in our homes – our marriages – our individual lives, “What’s killing us?” – if something is killing us.

As the old saying goes, “Name your poison?”

We now know we have to have a greater awareness of global pollution of our waters, our land, and our air. We know about toxic waste dumps and toxic assets – but we have to look around us and see where we can make a difference where we are – at our local level.

We also need to go into our hearts, our minds, our soul, and see where we have toxic soul or mind problems.

Take the issue of revenge or resentments. A hurt from last week or last year or 20 years ago can still be simmering and sending off toxic thoughts that sap our energy.

If you get the Sunday Washington Post – grab the magazine section for today [March 22, 2009] and read the cover article, “The Truth About Forgiveness” by Karen Houppert. It’s a long article, very well written, that has a powerful message for anyone who has a hurt buried in their memory.

The benefit of coming to Mass each Sunday is that we slow down. We rest from the rest of the week. As we heard in today’s first reading, without a temple, there can be lost Sabbaths; with a temple, we can retrieve lost Sabbaths. And with Sabbaths, our lives and our earth, which might have laid waste, can come back to life again. But we have to pick up a shovel. We have to step the steps. We have to rebuild the temple. We have to make the moves – with the help of God.

We who come to Church also are warned about sin. For example, from time to time we are asked to see where the 7 Capital Sins might be in our life: pride, anger, lust, greed, envy, gluttony, sloth. They can be like snakes in the desert – whose bite kills us every time.

What kills us?

Sin!

LENT

Lent is a 40 day desert experience where we take the time out to face our inner temptations – to ask, “What’s killing us?”


We know the scriptures have Jesus in the desert for 40 days – modeling and mirroring the Israelites 40 years in the desert.

We know Lent starts every year with Ash Wednesday and ashes being rubbed into our forehead reminding us that there are term limits to our life.

We know Jesus wrestled with big issues – big temptations – in his desert experience.

What about us? We’re now at the mid-point of Lent. What have we found out about ourselves? Has this been a good Lent so far – compared to other Lents? We’ve done some spiritual reading – perhaps from the Lenten materials we had in the back of church. We’ve prayed a bit more. We’ve taken time to have a few good walks – and as we walked we talked to ourselves a bit more. Or when alone in the car, we’ve kept quiet and prayed – using our car as a mobile chapel.

JESUIT EXERCISES

 
I’ve made various Jesuit retreats – and had some training in Ignatian Spirituality. If I correctly heard the Jesuits who taught me, the basic principle of St. Ignatius is very simple: if something is killing you, less; if something is helping you, more.


Then comes the nuance, the twist, the observation: often at first glance what looks great can kill us and what looks like it’s going to kill us, can help us.

For example, exercise. There’s the treadmill in our bedroom. It has become an expensive clothes hanger. We walk around it every time. We used it four times. We say to ourselves, “I’ll get all sweaty. It takes too much time. It’s boring.” We have a conversion. We begin using it again - a half hour every day for a week. Surprise! We realize we are feeling better about ourselves and our body.

For example, dieting. Not to take the extra donut or cake or seconds seems too difficult, but we do it, and we lose 15 pounds in 4 weeks and we feel much better.

For example, fasting from too much TV, or computer, or sitting or talking at eternal coffee breaks, seem tough. We say to ourselves that we don’t want to be mechanical or impersonal or be all “work, work, work!” We have a conversion. We try to be more organized and professional at our work. We give a full day’s work for a full day’s pay this Lent. Wow! We go home felling a bit better about ourselves.

DEUTERONOMY

I love the text in the Book of Deuteronomy – Deuteronomy 30: 19 - where Moses lines all the people up and says, “Today I set before you life and prosperity, death and disaster.” Then he says, “This is what works. This will give you life.” Then he says, “Choose life.”


A great morning prayer is to pause before we start our day and see the possibilities on the day’s menu. This is what kills me. This is what brings me life. Lord, today help me to choose life.

CHOOSE LIGHT AS WELL

Today’s gospel from John has the great observation that we often prefer darkness to light. We’re sneaks in the dark. We put our hand in the cookie jar when nobody is looking. We look both ways when we’re about to talk about someone behind their back. The person goes away on the business trip. Hey nobody will see me. The kid has the answers to the test up his or her sleeve - and is nervous that someone might spot his or her cheating tricks.

And when we cheat, we come home feeling a bit down – our shoulders more slumped, our eyes focus down on the ground like a snake.

When we walk in the light, when we give it or best, then we stand taller and feel less smaller.

JUSTIFY YOUR EXISTENCE

I read a quote two weeks ago and I went searching for it and couldn’t find it – but it stayed with me.

The gist of it went like this. Every year, everyone on the planet should have to sit down with God and justify their existence. Imagine what our thoughts would be as we stood on line – before heading into the office to meet with God?

Good News: God is not like the main evil character in one of those James Bond movies – who calls everyone in – reads them the riot act – and he signals one person out for doing a poor job. The "Evil Monster" then pushes a buttor or pulls a level and the floor opens up and the person is fed to the sharks.

Paul, in today’s reading from Ephesians, says, “God, who is rich in mercy, because of the great love he had for us, even when we were dead in our transgressions, brought us to life with Christ. By grace you have been saved, raised up with him, and seated us with him in the heavens in Christ Jesus.”

John, in today’s gospel, contains the great text we see at sporting events – like March Madness - John 3:16: “For God so loved the world that he gave his only Son, so that everyone who believes in him might not perish but might have eternal life.”

John, in today’s gospel, tells us the story of Moses putting the snake on the pole and for those who have been bit, if they look at the snake, they are healed. The obvious message for the Christian is that Jesus was nailed to the pole, to the cross, and for those who look at him, they can be healed – both here and hereafter.

CONCLUSION

The great change in spirituality and theology I have seen in my lifetime is that the stress is not just on the hereafter, but the here and now. So the theme I stressed in this homily is to use the rest of this Lent to see what’s killing us and what’s giving us life, both in the here and the hereafter. Go for more of what gives us life and less of what brings us death. Choose life. Amen.

Saturday, March 21, 2009


MIMIC

The lake mimicked both the trees
and the white wooden house
on the opposite shore,
and I stood there
tantalized by the stillness
of the waters, the beauty
of it all, not moving,
all so still, not reaching
for anything, just studying
the rest of the canvas,
till slowly a dark cloud
began to paint itself into
the upper left hand corner
of the picture. Dang it.
It happens every time,
doesn’t it?




© Andy Costello, Reflections, 2009
CHOICE

Come on now? You don’t have
to be the top half of the refrigerator,
the freezer, with that closed door
face every time people walk
into your space? Come on now?
Did you ever think about being
a fire place or a heater – giving
warmth to everyone in the house?


© Andy Costello, Reflections, 2009
UNSPOKEN WORDS


Silence _______________________
Silence says so much more than words.
Pauses _______________________
long pauses, waiting for words,
signals from each other.
Expectations ___________________
unstated hopes unclear, often
un-understood or misunderstood.
Silence _______________________
only the sound of cold
coming across a frozen lake.
Words _______________________
If only you had spoken,
if only I had spoken,
maybe we would have heard
what we need to tell each other
____________________________.


© Andy Costello, Reflections, 2009

Friday, March 20, 2009

NORTHERN WOODS

Walking, while watching
barren gray branches
against stone gray sky,
these bones, these knees
feel cold – feel old,
hesitant drizzle or fog
in my face, as I walk,
as I make nature’s
way of the cross
this Lent, in these woods,
all so late to green,
yet knowing, each step,
each station will bring Spring,
will bring resurrection.
I know green buds
reappear every year.




© Andy Costello, Reflections, 2009