CONGRATULATIONS

Looking for a neat Christmas gift? Margaret Wohlgemuth Burroughs of St. Mary’s Parish, Annapolis, has finished her labor of love – the book: Close-ups of History. It contains marvelous black and white photos by her late husband, AP Photographer, Henry Burroughs. It also has anecdotes and memoirs that Peg and so many others encouraged him to write down after his retirement and before his death in 2000.

You might have seen Peg’s picture and the front page story about the book in the Lifestyle section of last Sunday’s Annapolis Capital (August 12, 2007). The story was entitled, “A Focus on History” by Staff Writer, Theresa Winslow.

It would make not only a good coffee table and waiting room book, but also a book to sit on a couch with – going through the history of seven presidents of the United States from 1944 – 1974. I could picture lots of people doing this – alone or with a kid or grandkid.

When I mentioned the book to Evelyn Phelps of St. Mary’s – who has an astute eagle’s eye when it comes to editing – her first question was, “Who published it?” I told her, “University of Missouri Press.” She said, “I am impressed. They are top notch when it comes to historical books.” I said, “I didn’t know that.” She said, “Stick around kid and you’ll learn a lot more.”

Get this book and you’ll learn a lot more.

Last Sunday after Mass I got my first Christmas gift for 2007 – an autographed copy from Peg. Thanks Peg. I plan to buy some copies at our local book store for gifts.

WHAT’S IMPORTANT?

The teen-ager couldn’t wait for summer,
couldn’t wait for all those summer mornings
he and his grandfather
went fishing, went talking.

“Grandpa, what’s important?”

(LONG PAUSE)

“Well, you’ll have to sit back and listen to people
for the answer to that one.

“Or better, you’ll have to watch people.
Watch their hands, their faces,
but especially watch their eyes.
People always tell you
what’s important with their eyes.

“Why I once had a man tell me that his wife
was dead 3 years and 44 days
and he was still counting,
and his eyes were still crying

“Or listen to your grandma next time you take
her shopping. Listen to the things
she brings up -- the things she talks about
when she meets her friends.
I know you always find shopping
with her boring, but watch her
as she takes out her pictures of you
and all her other grandchildren
to show them to her friends.

“Watch people watch their watches.
They’re telling you an awful lot.
And yawns . . . Notice yawns.
They’re always a dead give away.

“Listen to the sounds behind words, behind voices . . .
what people get angry at,
when they get mad.
Then you’ll know when someone is stepping on somebody’s values or somebody’s nerves.
Then you’ll know that someone is going beyond
somebody’s ‘No trespassing. Private property’ sign.

“And don’t worry too much about people’s answers.
Listen to their questions.
Questions always tell you a lot more.”

(LONG PAUSE)

“By the way, why did you ask that question?”

© Andy Costello

WHY IS EVERYONE LAUGHING?

The title of my reflection for this feast of the Assumption is, “Why Is Everyone Laughing?”

Jack was still in a daze - standing there on the line – outside the gates of heaven. A lot of people had died that day. And it was a fairly long line – as everyone was heading towards the big main gate. And yes, he noticed, the gates were golden.

But he could see inside – through the fence. He could see these great, green fields – with high, high grass, waving in the bright sun. And he could see some people inside running and playing – and they all seemed so young – and everyone was laughing, laughing, laughing.

He felt old – but as he began to look at himself – he could see his body was young again. This was confusing - very confusing. He had just died at the age of 93 – and these last two years – were years of coughing too much, aching too much – feeling out of it too much.

He remembered he was scared to die – not knowing what was on the other side of life – whether there was really anyone or anything beyond death. Oh, he believed in God. He went to church much of his life. He tried to be a good guy; but there was always the wondering if there was anything beyond the grave.

Jack finally got to the main gate and walked in. Peter was there – greeting everyone personally – welcoming Jack – with this big smile on his big bearded face.

“Welcome into the Kingdom of Heaven.”

Jack was stunned.

“You made it!”

Jack said, “Okay” – but very hesitatingly.

“Go and enjoy yourself,” Peter said. “And by the way, there’s a whole group of people waiting over there for you – wondering when you were going to show up.”

Jack looked. There was his wife, his three sisters, two brothers, his daughter, his parents, grandparents, tons of friends – all young, brand new, laughing and laughing and waiting and waiting for him. It was a great moment of reunion. In fact, with each hug, he found himself saying, “This is heaven?"

And he began to laugh.

In fact, he stepped back and laughed and laughed and laughed. He said to himself, “If I knew it was going to be like this, I wouldn’t have worried about this down deep through the years.”

And everyone laughed with him – saying, “We know what you’re feeling. We know what you’re thinking. We went through what you’re going through right now.”

“Wow!”

And then his wife, his young wife, - and his sisters and his brothers, and their wives and his daughter, and his parents and their parents and their parents, all took him on a grand tour of heaven. No cars. No buses. Just walking and running, and laughing, in this vast paradise – with billions and billions and billions and billions of people from way back to just now – people of all races, languages and ways of life.

And then he met God: Father, Son and Holy Spirit – and what a welcome. He fell to his knees – but they lifted him up and embraced him laughing and what an embrace.

And weeks and weeks went by – but not weeks – because this was eternity – but it was some kind of time going by, but he didn’t know how to describe time that wasn’t time, and eternity with ever changing moments.

And each day Jack and those with him would meet new people – and the story telling was wonderful – and he met thousands and thousands of people – and every once and a while he would meet someone he had heard about or read about in his lifetime. Wow.

One day he met this beautiful young woman. She had this most amazing smile on her face. No wrinkles. Just a warm wonderful smile. And she was singing and laughing to herself. Jack had seen her sitting there, so he went over introduced himself to her.

She said her name was Mary.

"Where were you from Mary?”

“Nazareth.”

“Nazareth, Pennsylvania, near Bethlehem, Pennsylvania?”

"No,” she laughed. “Nazareth, Israel, a good distance from Bethlehem, Israel.”

“Oh,” Jack said. “Did you have any children?

“Yes, a son,” she said.

What was his name?”

“Jesus,” she answered.

Then came the moment of shock on Jack’s face.

“You’re the Mary! Wow!”

“I wasn’t a Catholic – so tell me why Catholics hold you so dearly?”

And she told him the story and he laughed and she laughed – and they laughed so loud – that people going by stopped and said, “Oh, once again, Mary’s telling him what Catholics knew about her and we didn’t know till we got up here.”

And everyone laughed.

And Mary said, "Would you like to take a walk? I'd like to introduce you to my cousin, Elizabeth. She has a son with the same first name as you."

FAITH IS RISKY BUSINESS

INTRODUCTION

The title of my homily is, “Faith is Risky Business.”

Today’s three readings urge us to reflect upon the issue of faith in our lives. And when we do, we often find out, “Faith is Risky Business.”

Hopefully, we also say, “It was worth it!”

· To get married takes faith.
· To stay married takes faith; to stick to one’s vows, for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, in good times and in bad, for 5, 10, 15, 25, 50 years, takes faith.
· To have a baby takes faith.
· To be a priest or a nun or a religious for 10, 20, 25, 50 years takes faith.
· To sell a house or in these days, to try to sell a house and move takes faith.
· To take a job – or to switch jobs takes faith.
· To communicate – to talk to each other takes faith.
· To volunteer takes faith.
· To come to church takes faith.
· To become a religious drop out or an agnostic or an atheist – takes faith – different from what we consider faith, but it takes a kind of faith.
· To return to our faith or become a Catholic takes faith.
· To go in a car with some drivers takes faith.
· To get out of bed in the morning takes faith.

Faith is risky business.

FIRST READING

Today’s first reading from Wisdom refers to the night of Passover – the great Exodus – the great exit of the Jews out of Egypt – to leave all and to follow Moses – to move from the know into the unknown – with only a promise and a dream of a land of milk and honey.

This country is a country of people from all over the world who made exits from elsewhere to experience new life here.

SECOND READING
Today’s second reading from Hebrews presents Abraham as the Father of faith. He obeyed God’s call and moved into the unknown.

Today’s second reading is one of the classic texts in the scriptures on faith – especially because it gives several great examples of faith.

The author of this Letter to the Hebrews says that faith is a hope in something using evidence that we can’t see. Faith is a test – and we don’t know the outcome.

TODAY’S GOSPEL

Today’s gospel continues the theme of faith. Jesus asks his disciples to let go of what they have for a treasure they cannot see. Faith is waiting for the Lord – without knowing when he is coming. In the early Church there was a strong belief that Jesus was about to return almost immediately and the world would end – so, “Be prepared.”

It didn’t happen. Christians kept waiting. But it wasn’t happening. Maybe Jesus meant something else. St. Luke begins the Acts of the Apostles asking, “Why are you still looking up? Go back to Jerusalem and start listening to how you are called to go into the world and reshape it in Jesus’ Spirit.”

FAITH

So faith has to do with the here and the hereafter.

Faith has to do with everyday decisions and eternal decisions.

Whether the here or the hereafter, faith has to do with the future.

Sometimes we have to practice blind faith; sometimes we have time to think things over and get a second opinion.

In fact, it’s smart, it’s wise, it’s prudent, to step back before we leap. It’s wise to see our options. It’s good if we can say, “No” as well as “Yes!” It’s called freedom.

Then knowing the pool has water in it, we climb the steps to the diving board. We head for the end of the diving board. If we can’t dive, we can hold our nose tight and jump, closing our eyes on the way down – then come up out of the water to the clapping of our family or friends on the edge of the pool. We did it – or we can turn and go back down the ladder – red with embarrassment – with support from our family and “chicken” from our friends.

Faith is a leap!

Someone said faith in life is like you’re holding onto the trapeze bar and you're swinging and you have to let go – if you want to make the show go on – and you have to believe the other will catch you.

The image I like is this: It’s winter. You’re walking. You come to a street corner. To get to the other side of the street you have to step off the curve. However, there is all this slush and water and ice. You hesitate. You look up around to see if there is a better place to cross. You decide: this is it. To leap or not to leap. You can simply step into the slush and icy water – but you’re not wearing boots. So you decide to jump. You can do it. You’ve done it before. Oops, sometimes there’s a catch. You have to do all this in the dark.

That’s faith.

We have to make acts and actions of faith when we’re experiencing relationship decisions - health decisions – job decisions – raising kids issues – money issues, life decisions etc.

Faith is risky business.

DEATH

The biggest leap is the leap through death. When we die, we are totally out of control about whether there is anything after death or not. Is there a God in the aftewards? Will there be this person called "me" in the afterwards? If there is a God, will God be there to catch me?

Death is the moment of the great act of faith. Make great acts of faith now, and often, so when you have to really make it, you’ve practiced, practiced, practiced.

FAITH IS A JOURNEY

But before we get to death, let’s look at life.

A great message from Jesus is, “Life is a journey.”

Jesus calls people to hit the road with him.

Jesus tells his disciples, “I am the way, the truth and the life.”

By being here today, we are saying to each other and with each other, we’re all in this together – making this journey through life with each other – with Christ as our leader and model and presence.

TWO EXAMPLES

As I was thinking about this yesterday - I remembered two moments from long ago.

COLORADO – ESTES PARK – ROCKY MOUNTAIN NATIONAL PARK

The first example that hit me was a vacation we made – 4 priests – one summer – probably around 1980.

What were your best vacations? You only know looking backwards from a distance.

A vacation is an act of faith. It sounds good on paper – you map out the possibilities. You talk to each other. You say, “Let’s do it!”

We had back packed 4 years in a row in the presidential range of mountain peaks in New Hampshire. Someone suggested the Rocky Mountains in Colorado.

We started from our church in the Bronx, N.Y. We looked at our watches on the George Washington Bridge. Then we drove 32 hours to Colorado – switching drivers every two hours automatically – rotating seats counter clockwise – stopping just for meals and bathroom breaks.

We got our camp sites from the Park Rangers and started climbing at 8,000 feet. One of our goals was to climb to the top of the continental divide. We chose Mount Alice – 13,310 feet high. The first assault failed. We didn’t know how close we were, but two guys went down a good bit and took a picture of two of us up there from below. We didn’t know till we were home and got the pictures back how close we were to the top.

The next day we did it. We chose the most direct way which was pulling ourselves up by hand – rock by rock – like climbing a ladder against a building. I thought the top would be just a narrow peak. Surprise it was a boulder field – the size of two football fields.

Looking back all these years afterwards, I still have fond memories of that day as well as that trip

Great vacations take great faith – and smart risks.

SECOND EXAMPLE - HANNAH HURNARD

As I was thinking about all this yesterday another memory came floating back – something I had completely forgotten.

Before that trip to the Rocky Mountains in Colorado someone suggested that I buy a paperback book, Hinds Feet on High Places, and read it when I was in the high places.

I paged through the book a bit on the trip out – and it seemed "smaltzy maltzy" - but I didn’t really read it till we were in the mountains.

Looking back now – years later – the book as well as that vacation were significant moves for me.

The book, Hinds Feet on High Places, (1955) by Hannah Hurnard, is an allegorical novel about a young woman whose name was "Much Afraid". She had two physical handicaps. She had a crooked mouth and her feet were a bit crippled – which made walking difficult.

She took care of sheep and lived in a valley – the Valley of Humiliation.

The book is a true allegory. Like the medieval play Everyman, the names of people and places tell the audience about the person or place.

Well this young lady, Much Afraid, had to deal with a lot of negative relatives and neighbors: Craven Fear, Bitterness, Resentment and Self Pity.

Things changed when she would meet the Shepherd at the watering hole and he suggested she climb to the High Places. Being Much Afraid she expressed her fears and doubts about being able to do this to the Shepherd – especially being crippled.

The Shepherd says she can do it – that her feet will become like hinds feet and she’ll be able to climb to the High Places.

So with faith she makes the journey. She has to go through a desert and then through the Forest of Danger and Tribulation – and then up into the mountain.

As she climbs she grows in strength. She needs Grace and Glory which she meets and receives in each step she takes.

Then after having a high – in the high places – with the great Shepherd, she is called to go back to the Valley of Humiliation. However, she’s a new woman, transformed, changed.

CONCLUSION

That’s what a vacation should do for us. It’s also the stuff of faith in the journey of life – here and hereafter. Today is a nice day. It's cooled off a bit. Take some time to look at your life – to look at the moves you’ve made, the trips, the vacations, the decisions, the choices of a lifetime.

Not every move was smart. Mistakes are made. But celebrate the great leaps of faith you’ve made – and the gifts you’ve received. And dream new dreams and great vacations – and great life moves.

MEDITATION: MARY

It was still quite warm after a hot humid day.

But suddenly a cool evening breeze came gliding across the Mediterranean. It ran up the hill and into the house where Mary was sitting.

She was all alone.

She began to look into the wine glass on the table in front of her.

Slowly she began to meditate, looking deeper and deeper into the wine glass of her life.

Slowly she turned the glass around and around cupping it in her hands. She began to see moments of her life. Like movie flashbacks they played on the surface of the wine. There she was a young woman running like a deer into the hill country to visit her cousin Elizabeth. She had to share the good news, both pregnant, both alive with life.

Her smile changed to serenity as the scene changed. There she was, three months later, walking home after having seen the birth of a baby: John the Baptist.

Next it was her turn, six months later in Bethlehem. It was the experience of her life: the glow of becoming a mother, the mother of Jesus, the filling of her womb, the filling of her breasts. Then came the Christmas moment: the arrival of the dancer, the kicker, the fruit of her womb. Joy to the world, the Lord had come: a crying, rubbery, laughing, baby boy.

Then the growing boy -- from childhood to manhood. To change the scenes, she shook the wine, seeing him as she watched him grow through the years, never being able to erase the words of Simeon in the temple: “A sword shall pierce your heart!” He was right. She felt all those sorrows: the rejections, the betrayal by Judas, the arrest, his closest friends running away, the denials by Peter, the beatings, the cursing, the spit, yes, spit, and finally the journey to Calvary to die on the cross.

She closed her eyes in pain. “He had quite a life, this son of mine.”

She paused. Silence ....

Then she slowly began to hear and concentrate on the other words of Simeon: “This child is also destined for the rise of many!”

She rose. Standing up she smiled and lifted her wine glass, her chalice, in a toast to God. Then she took the last sip of wine. “Yes,” she said to herself, “the best wine till last. All these years since his resurrection, so many have changed, so many have risen to new life, a better life because of him.”

And as she headed for bed, she could hear herself saying, “Amen! Come Lord Jesus!”

And the cool breeze continued throughout the night.”

*

© Andrew Costello

Liguorian Magazine

ONLY  IN  THE  MOVIES

He began to cry as he told me his story.

“It's been 10 years -- 10 years -- since we held each other!”

I remained quiet. Obviously, he needed someone to listen to him.

He went on, “But I haven't given up. I keep on hoping. I keep on trying to reach her with my love.”

After a long pause he said, “And all she ever says is, `We're too old for that. We're too old for that.'“ He reached down and held my wrist and whispered to me, “I tell her, `I don't want to rape you. All I want to do is hold you. Don't you know I love you.'“

I sat there quietly.

“The other day,” he continued, “we saw an old couple in the shopping center. They were walking in front of us holding hands. I said to my wife, `Look at them! Isn't that beautiful?' Her answer was the usual, `That only happens in the movies!'" He smiled at me for a moment and said, “What do you answer to that? `It only happens in the movies!' That's her answer every time.”

I didn't know what to say. In fact both of us became quiet. Our plane moved along quietly on its way to Florida. I was heading for Jacksonville to preach. He was heading home to Sarasota to his wife.

I asked how old he and his wife were.

“She's 65 and I'm 67.” Then he went on, “She moved out of our bedroom about 10 years ago. That was the killer and I didn't even snore. I didn't fight back. I became quiet. For a whole year I couldn't sleep. I tossed and turned -- and kept hearing the words of our marriage vows, `to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do us part.'“

The flight attendants were getting closer with beverages and dinner, so we both became quieter. He blew his nose and I think wiped some more tears from his eyes.

“I bought her a beautiful card for Christmas to tell her how much I love her -- but it didn't help. And I'm the type that always gave her flowers for our anniversary -- 41 years straight -- but they never seemed to impress her after the first time. I suppose she just stopped being a wife once she became a mother!”

That last remark made me nervous. The pain and the poison in his gut began reaching his lips. Luckily, just then our dinner arrived. Everything was nice and neat -- packaged -- perfectly organized. All kinds of ideas and questions about the man and his wife were bouncing around in my mind. I would like to give him nice, neat packaged advice that could help both of them to rise out of their “dead” marriage or whatever you would call their situation.

I didn't. I sat there during the meal realizing that I just didn't know what it was like to be in my 60's and to be married.

During the moments of silence a beautiful experience I had a few years back came to mind. It was the 50th Wedding Anniversary Mass for a couple I knew. When it came to the renewal of their marriage vows, the wife said, “I do.” But as she said that, she must have realized that was not enough. With a sparkle in her eye, she burst out loudly, “I do! I do!” And she began shaking his ring hand with both her hands. All of us in the church heard it and laughed. A few people even started to clap -- but then stopped -- as they realized the moment was too sacred for that. That moment was a special grace to all of us from that couple.

But what about this man and his wife? I began to wonder was it too late for their marriage to be improved? How long would it take to sort out 41 years of marriage and the stories and the background of their lives? Did they ever do it before? Could they pray together for their marriage to be healed? Could they hold each other and say, “I'm sorry!” Or would she say, “That only happens in the movies?”

I sat there lost in his pain and the questions that were erupting in me. He broke the silence with a comment about the dinner. Then he added how lucky we were to be heading to the warmth of Florida in February.

Just then the pilot announced that we were nearing Jacksonville. He asked that those who were going through to Sarasota stay on the plane.

I looked at the man and said that I wished I could help him and his wife with their problems. “I wish I had a magic formula that would take all your troubles away.”

He smiled and said, “Relax, Father, thanks, but just keep us in your prayers. And thanks for listening. Don't worry that you didn't solve my problems with my wife. Things don't get solved that easily. That only happens in the movies.”

Father Andy Costello, C.SS.R.

Liguorian Magazine

THE CAGED BIRD:
BAD THOUGHTS

How do you explain the difference between having bad thoughts and making them one's own? People often confess “having bad thoughts” and then ask, “Did I commit a sin?”

Some people have been helped by the example of the caged bird: There is a world of difference between a bird on a fence and a bird in a cage.

There is a world of difference between having bad thoughts and making a decision to own them, to net them, to cage them.

We have 10,000 thoughts everyday: thoughts about the weather, the neighbors, the family, traffic, gas mileage, music, politics, the economy, love, sex, in-laws, and what's for supper. These thoughts come and go across our mind like birds flying across the sky, landing on our fence, and they flying away.

But then there are those thoughts and ideas that become major – ideas we make decisions about – ideas that we act upon. Compared to all the other thoughts that fly across our minds, these are very few in number.

Recently, while giving a retreat on the Gospel of Matthew, I realized that Jesus taught the same idea about “bad thoughts” – but much clearer and much deeper. His ideas should bring peace to those who are overconcerned about “having bad thoughts”.

1) MORE THAN SEX

The first thing to establish is that “bad thoughts” refer to more than sex. There are 6 other capital sins besides lust. There are 8 other commandments besides the 6th and 9th commandments.

Yes, Jesus talked about adulterous thoughts, but he also talked about the inner damage other “bad thoughts” like judging others could do (Matthew 7: 1 - 5). He taught that excessive worry about money, clothes, eating, drinking, and tomorrow can destroy us (Matthew 6: 19 - 34). He warned about not forgiving from the heart (Matthew 18: 35). And all through the Gospel of Matthew we find constant warnings about anger, hypocrisy, and self-righteousness.

Besides adultery, then, the Gospel of Matthew provides a long list of “bad thoughts” to be careful about. Moreover, if we limit “bad thoughts” to sexual bad thoughts, we could end up hurting ourselves because we might become blind and unaware of worse thoughts.

The English writer and convert to Christianity, C.S. Lewis, pointed this out. He wrote that “the center of Christian morality is not here. If anyone thinks that Christians regard unchastity as the supreme vice, he is quite wrong. The sins of the flesh are bad, but they are the least bad of all sins. All the worst pleasures are purely spiritual: the pleasure of putting other people in the wrong, of bossing and patronizing and spoiling sport, and backbiting; the pleasures of power, of hatred.” Then he adds this deep insight, “For there are two things inside me, competing with the human self which I must try to become. They are the Animal self, and the Diabolical self. The Diabolical self is the worse of the two. That is why a cold, self-righteous prig who goes regularly to church may be far nearer to hell than a prostitute. But, of course, it is better to be neither (Mere Christianity, pp. 94 - 95).

In that one clear statement, C. S. Lewis sums up the thoughts and feelings one should receive from reading the Gospel of Matthew. Yes, Jesus warns about adulterous thoughts, but he spends far more time and energy challenging the Pharisees to become aware of their dangerous inner thought patterns and attitudes – especially thoughts of self-righteousness (Cf. Matthew 9: 9-13). Jesus told them bluntly, “Let me make it clear that tax collectors and prostitutes are entering the kingdom of God before you” (Matthew 21: 31).

2) SIN IS A DECISION

One often hears the saying, “Love is a decision!” In other words, love is more than a feeling. We can also make that statement about the opposite of love, “Sin is a decision!”

The thought or the feeling is not the sin, the decision is. If love takes in the whole heart, soul and mind of a person, so too sin (Cf. Matthew 22: 37). This has been a constant moral teaching down through the ages. The thought, the temptation, the hint to sin, is not the sin. The thought or the feeling is like a bird flying across the sky and then landing on our fence. When we decide to cage it, then our problems begin.

Sin has to do with consent – consent of the will. And before consent, we need to know the danger before us and to take sufficient time to consider the alternatives. Most of us have heard of the classical 3 points to look at when examining our consciences about serious sins. First, when we are talking about mortal or deadly sins we are obviously talking about serious matter. Secondly, for a sin to be a sin we must take time for sufficient reflection on the choices before us. Thirdly, we decide to go ahead with full consent of our will.

Some people, especially those who tend to be scrupulous, often think that all “bad thoughts” are sinful. They forget about sufficient reflection and full consent of the will. They forget about the difference between a bird on a fence and the decision to try to cage it.

Sin then is a decision – a deadly decision. And that's where the greatest damage takes place – in our wills. Moreover, we can decide to sin and no actually carry out what we planned and still seriously hurt ourselves. We can decide to steal, only to discover that the store is closed or the boss walked into the room unexpectedly.

All through the Gospel of Matthew we hear Jesus preaching that morality is centered in the heart of a person and not in externals. People around him were making external traditions and superstitions more important than the heart and soul of a person. They were cleansing the outside of the cup while leaving the inside dirty. They were like nice green cemeteries with beautiful flowers and whitewashed tombs for eye to see, but underneath filled with death (Cf. Matthew 23: 25 - 29).

Birds on the fence are on the outside of our lives. However, we can choose to try to capture and cage them. We have freedom of choice to go either way. We can decide to enter the narrow or the wide gate, to take the rough or the easy road, to be a good tree or a bad one, to build our house on rock or on sand (Matthew 7: 13 - 27). The choice is always ours – choices that shape our personalities – choices that help us or hurt us. Love is a decision. Sin is a decision.

3) WHEAT OR WEEDS
And lastly, one of the parables we find in the Gospel of Matthew, what of “The Wheat and the Weeds,” can help us in this question of “Bad thoughts” (Matthew 13: 24- 30).

The farmer planted wheat. At night while he was asleep his enemy came and planted weeds. The wheat began to mature, so too the weeds. The farmhands came running, “Didn't you plant wheat? Where are the weeds coming from?” The farmhands then asked if they should remove the weeds. “No, you might pull up the wheat along with the weeds. Let them both grow until harvest time!”

The farmer did not make a decision to plant weed, yet they were there. So too “bad thoughts”. Television, family, movies, newspapers, books, the classroom, and so much of what surrounds us invades us. New ideas like birds are constantly landing on our mind. So often we are asleep as new ideas are being planted within us. Some are wheat; some are weeds.

Of course we shouldn't be our own enemy, planting weeds in our mind. We have to watch what we read and what we see. We have some control over our life. People working with computers often say, “Garbage in, garbage out.” If we spend our time planting weeds we will not harvest wheat. The gospel call us to become wheat, so as to become bread, so as to become the Body of Christ, to give our lives for others, to let them eat us up (Matthew 26: 28; John 12: 24; 1 Corinthians 12: 12 - 31).

Yet in a mysterious way, the weeds, the bad thoughts we have, can also serve us. The farmer said not to pull the weeds out, because the wheat might be ruined. Our pride wants to pull them out. Our pride tells us that we shouldn't have any weeds. We want the best lawn on the street. No weeds allowed! We want to look perfect, correct, always right. And this can lead to self-righteousness and pride – the major sin – the sin that Jesus warns the Pharisees about all through the Gospel of Matthew. Down deep we know that many of the bad thoughts that we have are rooted in sins of the past, what we have read, what we have done, and especially what we have failed to do. We don't like to admit this, especially when the sin of prided starts appearing in our field.

C.S. Lewis said, “You may remember, when I was talking about sexual morality, I warned you that the centre of Christian morals did not lie there. Well, now, we have come to the centre. According to Christian teachers, the essential vice, the utmost evil, is Pride. Unchastity, anger, greed, drunkenness, and all that, are mere fleabites in comparison: it is through Pride that the devil became the devil: Pride leads to every other vice: it is the complete anti-God state of mind” (Mere Christianity, p. 109)

And our bad thoughts not only keep us humble, they can also connect us with everyone else. Everyone has weeds; everyone has bad thoughts; everyone has in. The proud person wants to be like God – the Sinless One. To paraphrase a famous image of Jesus, “We see the weeds in the other person's field or lawn, and not in our own” (Cf. Matthew 7: 1 - 5). The humble person doesn't try to hide the fact that he or she has sinned and can sin again. They realize, starting with themselves, that everyone in the church is a sinner, and that's one of the main reasons they are in church (Cf. Matthew 9: 10 -11).

And we can conclude by also saying that bad thoughts can and should bring us to our knees in prayer. We need God to survive. God sent his Son to save us. Here we have one of the major reasons why the Pharisees rejected Jesus. They saw no need for him. They thought they were all wheat. And when Jesus, like one of the farmhands, came to tell them they had weeds in their field, bad thoughts of anger began taking over their minds. Jesus said to them and now to us, “I have come to call, not the self-righteous, but sinners” (Matthew 9: 13). Knowing that the birds of temptation are around us, knowing that we have caged them at times, bad thoughts can lead us to pray to Our Father, “Lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil. Amen” (Cf. Matthew 6: 13).

Father Andrew
 Costello, C.SS.R.

Liguorian Magazine