FATHER GREG BOYLE, S.J.

For anyone upset about priests these days - and / or pope - bishops - and Catholic Church - if you need good news, here is some good news that I heard the other day while driving back from a wedding reception blessing.

Go to Google and simply type in the words: Father Greg Boyle: NPR

Then listen to Terry Gross' Fresh Air 40 minute interview with him and his work all these years. A lot of it is with folks who were in gangs in Los Angeles.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Some folks asked my thoughts on this latest burst of news about the sexual abuse of children, the pope, and the way it was and is being dealt with.

My first approach would be to present Good News.

Next would be some further comments. I am aware that sometimes saying nothing is a practical way to go - because in many ways, no matter what you say, people are going to take what you say - in the way they are going to take it. This issue can be a minefield.

Dialogue is difficult.

Listening is tough.

We priests talk amongst ourselves about this. This has been a tough 8 years.

I hear people protesting for full disclosure and transparency. I am grateful that much has been made public. For example, check out the John Jay College of Criminal Justice Study on Clergy Sexual Abuse - U.S. Bishops. It was commissioned at the Dallas 2002 meeting of the U.S. Catholic Bishops. Has any other group hung that much laundry on line?

I don't plan to try to evoke empathy for priests. I hope everyone just wants all of us to get our house in order - and help and protect those who have been hurt or could be hurt in the future.

So I stand at the edge of the lake. To wade in, to dive in or to go back to my blanket? That is my question.

I'll dive in - without trying to be too defensive. Obviously, I am not going to try to defend sin and crime, horror and abuse.

Besides my opening story about Father Greg Boyle, let me go this way.

Let me start with self.

Let me start with sin.

I have on a much earlier blog, a tiny saying, "Dig anywhere and you'll find dirt."

A few people who read that said to me, "I don't get it."

I didn't explain.

If I did, I wouldn't have written it as simply as I thought I did.

"Dig anywhere and you'll find dirt."

Dig into any person's life and you'll find dirt.

Can anyone say I don't have dirt?

Is anyone not nervous about those who seem to like to get dirt on others?

The number # 1 topic of conversation is others - and it's often not complementary.

Gossip gets greater ratings at the coffee machine than compliments?

Agree or disagree?

Dirt shows up on the front of camera lenses.

Who of us would want someone to take a camera and make a film of every moment of our life?

Who of us would want someone to take a camera and film us in our sins? Bad days? Bad moments? At our worse?

As we heard in the gospel a few Sunday's back, "Let anyone among you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone at her." [Cf. John 8:1 -11.]

When it comes to abuse and mess, sin makes the news.

As priest, as human, as me, I know that every one has dirt - and I hold that every person has a right to privacy, learning, and recovery.

Every family has dirt.

I never had a cat - but I think I heard that a cat hides its mess.

Cover ups are often part of the plot in many a cop, army, detective movie or TV series.

"Let him or her who has not covered something up or let something slide make the first attack on cover ups."

Having stated that, I also say that somethings better not be covered up - especially when it's a crime and it comes to children and the vulnerable.

And if there is a cover up, expect to pay for the consequences.

When will the higher ups realize you can't blame the messenger - you can't blame the media?

100 years ago people could get away with evil a lot more than today.

To paraphrase a saying of Jesus, "The press we always have with us."

Let's not blame the press for cover ups or crimes! Their job is to open up stories.

My hope is that they get the story right - understand the nuances - and in the sexual abuse of children story - they publicize what has been learned - up to this date - so as to protect the vulnerable.

I also want to add a nuance that I find illusive and slippery. I wonder if anyone at a meeting for what goes in a paper or on the news asks the ethical question: "Can we say this? Do we know the impact of this on this person's family? Are we doing this for our good ratings or for another's good?" There are consequences for those who report evil - sin - and it can destroy another person's family and life.

Sometimes he or she who hesitates is saved.

Years and years ago I received a phone call around 2 in the morning. It was from the police. They had a priest in the local jail who got drunk and had gotten into a fight in a local bar. The police were called. The priest was from another state and the policeman on the phone asked if I could come and get him - before the newspapers got wind of this - and could I get him home? I had never met this priest before. Under cover of darkness I got him home. I didn't know the cop - but he was Catholic and he didn't want this out. Right? Wrong? Got it done. And the priest got help and got on with his life. He's now dead!

What would you do?

What would you want if the person who messed up was a member of your family or your community?

What would you want if it was you?

What is your similar story? Christmas party? Wedding? Vacation? Business trip? The money was just sitting there?

Of course there is a difference between child abuse and alcohol abuse. There is a difference between a one time slip up and ongoing drunken rage and disasters.

Sin - horror - abuse - ought to get us to pause!

Am I telling this story because when another falls it makes me feel better?

Does this prove that my take on religion or God or priests or others is correct?

And as Christians we ought to know what Saint Paul publicized loud and clear in his Letter to the Romans - especially when he challenges us to uncover what is within each of us. Tough stuff." It causes me to tremble, tremble, tremble..." as the old hymn goes.

And we've all seen how cover ups can bring companies and elected and appointed officials down.

Each of us and all of us need to do our homework on this - as well as talk to each other about all this.

What would we want for our children, our world, as well as ourselves?

There is the Golden Rule - and it's here to protect us.

There is the Native American proverb we have all heard a hundred times: "Don't judge a person till you have walked a mile in their moccasins."

I came up with a follow up saying, "Don't judge a person till you have walked a mile in their sins."
I have a faint memory of watching many, many years ago a TV talk show on which F. Lee Bailey, the lawyer, talked about Anthony DeSalvo, the so called, "Boston Strangler." Bailey defended him as lawyer and said if you knew the childhood background of this man, you would have some sympathy for him. Anthony's father, Frank DeSalvo was a violent alcoholic. He beat his wife Charlotte in front of the kids - knocking out her teeth and bending back her fingers till they broke. He forced his kids to watch him having sex with prostitutes whom he had brought home. His father sold Anthony into slavery - along with his sister - when he was 9 years of age - to a farmer in Maine. [Check this stuff out if you don't believe me.]

That story about watching a TV talk show one evening - even though it's a fuzzy memory - has had an impact on my life - how I see each person - perpetrator as well as victim, sinner and sinned against.

I thought about this story when I heard the names of priests who had committed horrendous crimes.

Being a priest, but also being human, I thought of the priest first - not the kids. I was seeing a person being led to a court house. I wasn't seeing the young people they had abused.

When I saw them on TV - or when I thought about them - obviously I thought and prayed for these priests.

So of course abuse is horrible. It can be a crime - e.g., sexual abuse of minors. Worse: it can mess folks up for life.

Now down through the centuries abuse has been hidden - moved - ignored - been swept into the corner - hoping it would go away.

What am I saying here? I am saying that people cover things up!

I am aware that I need to be sensitive - aware that a broken nose or arm - makes us concentrate on the broken.

What am I saying here? I'm saying that the arm or the nose is only one part of the body.

Ooops, possible contradiction here, Paul says if one part hurts, all parts hurt. [Cf. 1 Corinthians 12]

And this Body called Church is hurting!

Having said that, I also want to broadcast that there are lots of priests working every day for others - and there are lots of folks in our church reaching out to others every day. For example, I am impressed with the wonderful folks here in St. Mary's Parish, Annapolis, Maryland who help lots and lots of people through our St. Vincent de Paul Society - as well as the folks who donate big time to our poor box - and this and that, and then some other ministry - parenting, volunteering, etc.

Someone wrote me and said I was a bit insensitive with this blog piece, so I changed it and added to it quite a bit. I guess I'm one of those many priests who are sad and sick with the horror stories of the crimes and cruelty when it comes to abuse. Children were severely hurt. Bad news. Horrible news. Then came the cover ups, the mistakes and the mismanagement in trying to stop pedophiles. Bad news. Horrible news.

There was a learning curve in all this. Lawsuits and reporting and more research certainly sped things up.

I want to state that in the last 8 years the Catholic Church in the United States has done a lot to protect children with strong policies and procedures. Good news.

I also hold that families and others - cover up abuse. Bad news. If all the stories about priests does anything in the last 8 years, I hope it makes people more aware of this perversion. Keep your eye on who is near and with your children.

In the meanwhile, I also thought it would be smart to broadcast good news. So listen to Father Greg Boyle's story on NPR. Then tell your kids, "Think priesthood!" We need priests - good priests. They too can be another Greg Boyle. Tell them about St. Vincent de Paul and the St. Vincent de Paul work around our world, etc. etc. etc. They can do that as well.

ISOLATION

Quote of the Day: March 29, 2010


"Isolation is the worst possible counselor."


Miguel de Unamuon [1864-1936] in Civilization is Civilism

STOP!

There are STOP signs everywhere.

Bloody red stop signs.

Stop to see them this week - Holy Week.

Stop! See that guy over there – the guy with the reddish grey beard – yes him, the medium size guy wearing the tan robe - with the palm branch in his hand – praising Jesus with loud Hosannas today. I don’t know if he’s going to be wearing the same tan robe next Friday – but he’s going to be in the crowd screaming, “Crucify him. Crucify him.”

Stop! Realize people can switch so quickly. You have to dig to get depth.

Stop! See Judas this week – realizing ahead of the rest – that it’s all over. "That’s it. Jesus has been warning us – why he came to Jerusalem for the Passover – and we wouldn’t hear any of this kind of stuff from him." See Judas wanting to get something out of the whole mess – his whole investment of dream and time. So he sells Jesus out. He betrays him for 30 pieces of silver – and he bags the money.

Stop! See Jesus wanting to celebrate this last Passover Meal with his disciples – and he knows of a well furnished upper room. Unlike at his birth, there was room – even though the city was crowded – packed for the Passover – with the sound of thousands of Pascal Lambs being slaughtered and sold for silver coins for the feast. At that Sacred Meal Jesus washes his disciples feet. He feeds them with bread and wine. He speaks powerful words of love – that are still available for our digestion 2000 years later.

Stop! This week read the last sections of Matthew, Mark, Luke and John – especially John.

Stop! Hear Jesus at the meal also talk about betrayal and denial. Judas turns red blood blush when Jesus says the one who is about to betray me is the one who dips his bread in the red sauce on the table. At this Judas has to rush out into the night. He feels caught, trapped red handed. And Peter – big mouth Peter – pounding his fisherman’s fist on the Last Supper table – announces, “Even if everyone leaves you Jesus, I won’t!” And Jesus says, ‘Before the cock crows three times, you will have denied me three times Peter!” And that’s what Peter does: “I deny….” “I deny….” “I deny….”

Stop! See the scene in the garden that night. See the disciples unable to stay awake with Jesus even for an hour – that night when Jesus almost despairs – when he feels so all alone – without God, our Father, without friends.

Stop! See the kiss by Judas – the arrest – the disciples panic and running to escape and save their skins. See Jesus dragged, ridiculed, laughed at, spat at, beaten and crowned with thorns.

Stop! See the contrasts: good and evil, light and dark, sin and grace, Friday and Sunday, death and resurrection. See the contrasts between Pilate and Herod – dealing with what to do with Jesus – and how they are concerned with the crowd. See the contrast between Peter and Judas. One commits suicide – because he can’t stand himself; the other discovers himself anew through forgiveness.

Stop! See the trial and the contrast in the bizarre contest created by Pilate to choose Jesus or Barabbas. See Jesus being dragged to Calvary.

Stop! Study the faces. Station yourself in a church. Sit and study so many faces on the wall in the Stations of the Cross in every Catholic church in the world. Stop! See the contrast between the two thieves crucified next to Jesus in the twelfth station.

Stop! Hear Jesus' Seven Last Words.

Stop! See Jesus die.

Stop! The cross is a STOP sign.

Stop! You know Jesus will rise – but pause before all that and sort out your thoughts – where you fit into the story – where you fit into the crowd. Would you have climbed the hill that day? Would you take that risk? Few did. Mary did. The Beloved Disciple did.

Stop! Would I?

Stop! This is the week to stop and see. This is the week to stop and hear. This is the week to stop and learn – and then start again – next week, next Sunday, Easter Sunday with the Risen Christ. Alleluia. Alleluia.

FAILURES, 

BUT THEN THERE 

IS ALWAYS THE SUN 

THAT RISES 

ON SUNDAY MORNING! 

Palm Sunday - March 28, 2010

Quote of the Day:

"A series of failures may culminate in the best possible result."

Gisela Richter, in My Memoirs; Recollection of an Archaeologist's Life, 1972

HUMILITY

Quote of the Day:  March 27, 2010


"There is a story of a rabbi and a cantor and a humble synagogue cleaner who were preparing for the Day of Atonement. The rabbi beat his breast, and said, 'I am nothing, I am nothing.' The cantor beat his breast and said, 'I am nothing, I am nothing.' The cleaner beat his breast, and said, 'I am nothing, I am nothing.' And the rabbi said to the cantor, 'Look who thinks he's nothing.'"

Alan Paton

GOD AND 

COMMON SENSE

Quote of the Day:  March 26,  2010

"I don't know why it is that the religious never ascribe common sense to God."

W. Somerset Maugham [1874-1965]

ANNUNCIATION

Quote of the Day - Feast of the Annunciation - March 25,  2010

"In Marian piety,
the role of the Trinity
and of Christ
should clearly be seen
as essential and intrinsic.

And this
because Christian worship
is essentially worship of the Father,
the Son and the Holy Spirit,
or as the liturgy says,
worship of the Father
through the Son
in the Holy Spirit.

In the case of Mary, 

everything is related to Christ
and everything depends on him.

It was because of the part 

she was to play
in the life of Christ
that the Father
chose her from all eternity
as the mother full of grace
and adorned her
with gifts of the Spirit
granted to no other."

Pope Paul VI

SIDEWAYS

Sideways conversations ….
When they become our regular conversations,
then is it time to say this relationship
is over – or it needs an overhaul?
You’re telling me you cleaned the bathroom
and swept the garage – and emptied the
dishwasher. Why don’t you just say
you’re angry because you think you’re doing
all the work and I’m doing nothing?
That’s sideways conversations.
This is straight out with it conversation.
So right now tell me what are really
feeling about all this? Talk to me!

© Andy Costello, Reflections 2010

NEVER WAS # 1

Rejected, not elected,
didn’t get enough votes
that day, but I tried ….

Nobody called,
so I guess I didn’t get the job.

Forgot mom’s birthday.
A call would have made a difference,
even though my sister is her favorite.

Came in 48th out of 89 in the race –
not that bad, not that good….

And Pilate gave the crowd a choice.
Whom to release: Barabbas or Jesus?
And the crowd screamed for Barabbas.

Sometimes it’s going to be a long
day when you come in second place.

© Andy Costello, Reflections 2010

YAWN COMMUNICATION

Quote of the Day: May 24, 2010

"A yawn may be defined as a silent yell."


Gilbert Keith Chesterton

GOSSIP

Quote of the Day: March 23, 2010


"Whoever gossips to you will gossip of you."


Spanish Proverb

BEAUTY

Quote of the Day: March 22, 2010

"Glory be to God for dappled things."

Gerard Manley Hopkins [1844-1889], Pied Beauty.

YOU  WERE  THERE

INTRODUCTION

The title of my homily for this Fifth Sunday in Lent (C) is, “You Were There.”

What would it have been like, if you went up to the temple in Jerusalem that day to pray? There was Jesus sitting in the temple area teaching a group of people. You stop. You stand at the edge of the crowd. You’re watching. You’re listening.

Suddenly you hear commotion coming from behind you. A group of men are dragging a woman. Obviously something’s wrong. They stand her there in the middle of everyone - there in front of Jesus.

Someone says, “Rabbi, this woman was caught in the very act of committing adultery.”

“Uh oh!” you say to yourself.

Someone continues, “Now in the law, Moses commanded us to stone such women. So what do you say?”

You say to yourself, “These guys are not concerned about this woman. They are just using her to get Jesus – to try to condemn him.”

You see Jesus start to write on the ground with his finger.

He remains silent – for what feels like an eternity. They keep badgering him.

He straightens up and says to them, “Let the one among you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone at her.”

Then he bends over and writes or doodles in the dirt again.

Slowly they drop their rocks and start walking away – beginning with the elders.

Jesus straightens up. He is all alone with the woman. You hear him ask, “Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?”

She answers, “No one, sir.”

So Jesus says, “Neither do I condemn you. Go, and from now on do not sin any more.”

The woman wipes her tears – you wipe your tears – and she walks away with a great smile on her face.

You were there.

What would it have been like to have been there?

How would that affect the rest of your life?

AT WORK

You’re at work. A small group is standing at the coffee machine. They are talking about her again. They suspect she’s having an affair. Whispered words made out of rocks are flying.

You’re sitting there nervous. You begin doodling with your finger on your desk.

Gossip gets worse. “You think she’s bad. What about you know whom? Her husband has no clue.”

You begin writing stuff about so and so with your finger on your desk top – not actual words – but with finger doodling on the surface.

And then someone says, “I was at church this past Sunday and Jesus said, “Let the one among you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone at her.”

And everyone becomes quiet and starts to walk away from the coffee machine and donuts – starting with the oldest.

You were there.

How would that affect the rest of your life?

NATHANIEL HAWTHORNE

You see the movie version of Nathaniel Hawthorne’s book, The Scarlet Letter, and you say to yourself , “Woo! People can be nasty.”

You start to read more of Hawthorne and you begin to reflect, “Wow! He was off on puritanical thinking. He was realizing that Puritans were still around and have always been around.

You read his story, Transfiguration. You read that the very human Miriam says to the very puritanical Hilda, “You have no sin nor any conception of it, therefore you are so terribly severe. As an angel you are not amiss, but as a human creature you need a sin to soften you.”

You go to yourself, “Woo!”

Or you type in “Nathaniel Hawthorne” on the Google search engine. You find a sermon by Rev. Judith Robbins about another story by Nathaniel Hawthorne, The Minister’s Black Veil. An 18th century minister faces his congregation one Sunday morning wearing a black veil – which hid the upper part of his face. In fact, he wears the veil throughout the whole story – and his wife can’t convince him to take it off. He dies with his face covered.

Then you read that Hawthorne may have based his story on an actual minister in York, Maine, Joseph Moody, who had accidentally killed a close friend. In horror and repentance for what he had done, he wore a veil over his face for the rest of his life.

You have an “Aha Moment.” You realize: everyone does that. We all wear masks and veils – over our faces after our sins – because we feel deep shame and separation from those we know and love. We’ve all seen people who get caught in sin or crime or their hand in the cookie jar and they put a newspaper in front of their face or a coat over their head as they are being led into a court house.

You think, “Wow I know what it is to put my face in my hands. I know what it is to want to escape. I’ve been there.”

QUOTE FROM HELEN HAYES

Or you’re reading a book and there is a quote from Helen Hayes’ 1968 autobiography, A Gift of Joy, On Reflection and My Life in Three Acts. You read the following quote from this former famous American Actress: “He could smell a sinner five miles away on a windless day.”

You wonder whom she’s talking about? The he indicates it’s a male. Was it a priest? Was it an older brother – like in last Sunday’s story of the Prodigal Son smelling the pigsty his brother was in from 5 or 50 miles away? Was it a neighbor? I don’t know.

You say to yourself, “I’ll have to read her autobiography to find out.”

In the meanwhile you go to your computer and read up about Helen Hayes. You say to yourself, “The Internet is amazing.” You find out Helen Hayes was an Irish Catholic. She dropped out of Church for years because she married someone who was Protestant and divorced and she was denied communion. You wonder, “How did she deal with all that? How did she deal being out of communion with her roots? What were her Sunday morning’s like? Did she experience compassion from anyone in her Church or her family or self?”

You start thinking about life. It has its twists and turns – sin and grace. We find ourselves in situations that we wish we didn’t open the door to. We are where we’ve been. We twist Descartes’ famous words, “Cogito, ergo sum" - “I think, therefore I am”, a bit. It becomes, “We are what we think.” What were Helen Hayes thoughts about life? I guess I’ll have to read her autobiography. I guess we all have to write our autobiography. After all, we – beginning with the elders – spend much of our later years inside our head – talking and talking to ourselves about what happened in our life and how we got to where we got. We were there.

AS PRIEST

As priest I certainly know a lot about sin. As a human being I know less about sin – because of my sinfulness.

As I was putting together this homily, I was wondering if I could say the following, “There are 3 types of human beings: those who never look at their own thoughts and behaviors and concentrate only on others; those who never look at others, but only concentrate on themselves – talking to themselves about how wonderful or how horrible they are; and those who are humbled – who are making their share of mistakes, learning a bit from them, and have grown in grace and wisdom – understanding themselves and others a bit more every day and every Lent."

How about you? How understanding are you? How compassionate are you? What would you be like in hearing people’s confessions?

I remember the old saying, “A person wrapped up in themselves makes a pretty small package?” Or should it be “ugly" small package?

Some people only see others’ faults. Some people only see their own faults – but in an unhealthy way – becoming scrupulous about little things or they are unable to accept forgiveness for their messes and mistakes. Some people are still learning.

Some people throw rocks at others. Some people hit themselves with rocks – rocks made of the sins of their past. Some people can’t forgive others. Some people drop the rocks and learn forgiveness.

As priest on hundreds of weekend retreats for men and women we often had the so called, “Question and Answer Period” on the Saturday night of a weekend retreat.

Some people ask questions. Some people make statements.

I often found some of those moments awkward and scary. There were moments when I was less understanding and compassionate in my mind towards someone who raised their hand and said something that bugged me.

Someone would stand up and blast homosexuals and I would know that someone there might be homosexual or someone there had a son or a daughter who was gay – and here someone was throwing rocks at other human beings with words. Woo.

Someone would protest about abortions and I knew there would be people there who were feeling remorse for having an abortion – and it’s been bothering them especially in their end of their life years. I also knew that person might have been in on an abortion and feel the horror of it – down deep – and don’t know what to do with those thoughts and feelings – and so they blast others – to get back at themselves – or to try to prevent others from feeling the hurt they feel.

My prayer is that a person making these “ouch statements” become more understanding and compassionate in their own hearts – towards themselves and others.

I used to give AA retreats – even though I’m not an alcoholic. When I was stationed in Ohio, I got a phone call by accident once if I would help on an AA retreat. Having done them back in the 1970’s, I said, “Okay.” I found out when I got up to Michigan to be part of this retreat for over 200 men that they thought I was another priest who did have a drinking problem. I ended up doing that for 8 years and every year it was a powerful weekend.

One year a man got up to give his monologue, also called “drunkalog” – his story. Surprise! He was a priest. I can’t break anonymity, but I can say, “As I heard the mess he made of his life and the recovery he made of his life with the help of the higher power of Christ, I found myself saying, “If I ever got into a mess in my life, I know the one person I would call up immediately and say, ‘Can I talk to you.’”

CONCLUSION: DROP THE ROCKS

Isn’t this what Lent is about? To go into the desert of our soul for 40 days and discover we are a wasteland with wild animals – as Isaiah said in today’s first reading and also discover water there and Jesus is there. We can bloom. We can mature as Paul says in today’s second reading.

Isn’t that what Jesus wanted? Doesn’t Jesus want us to understand each other, not be scared of each other, but to talk to each other and not throw rocks at each other.

POSITIVE  THINKING 

Quote of the Day: March 21,  2012




"If you think you can, you can. And if you think you can't, you're right."


Mary Kay Ash, New York Times, October 20, 1985

AWARENESS

Quote of the Day: March 20,  2010


“There is no security on this earth; there is only opportunity.”


Douglas MacArthur [1880-1964], in Courtney Whitney, MacArthur: His Rendezvous with History, 1955

Photo on top is a picture of the General Douglas MacArthur memorial statues at Red Beach, Palo, Leyte, Philippines. The statues are about 10 feet tall - placed there to commemorate the Oct. 20, 1944 moment that MacArthur returned. It's called MacArthur Park - but during the presidential term of Ferdinand Marcos, it was called Imelda Park - especially because the First Lady, Imelda Marcos, developed the memorial and was from this province. After they left the Philippines it went back to the original name "MacArthur Park".

FATHERHOOD

March 19, 2010

Quote of the Day:

"Father: one whose daughter marries a man vastly her inferior mentally, but then gives birth to unbelievably brilliant grandchildren.”

Anonymous

RELIGIOUS

AWAKENING

Quote of the Day:   March 18, 2010


"A religious awakening which does not awaken the sleeper to love has roused him in vain."


Jessamyn West, The Quaker Reader, 1962

INNER  LIFE

Quote of the Day:   March 17, 2010


"May you sense around you the secret Elsewhere
Where the presences that have left you dwell."

Irish blessing from John O'Donohue, Benedictus, A Book of Blessings, 2007, page 62

MARRIAGE: MOTIVES

Quote of the Day:  March 16, 2010


"Why did you two ever get married?"

"Ah, I don't know. It was raining, and we were in Pittsburgh."



Movie dialogue in "The Bride Walks Out," [1936] between Barbara Stanwych and Helen Broderick


Questions:

Why did you get married?

What would you consider the 3 top reasons why people marry?

What would be the 3 top reasons people stay married?

Have your motives about being married changed through the years?

IT

INTRODUCTION

Last night as I reflected on today’s readings for this Tuesday in the Fourth Week of Lent, it hit me to go the way of a poetic reflection instead of a homily. I do this at times when I feel homilied out. So this is called, “It”. It is not too long.

IT

He struggled with it
for 38 years.
He tried everything,
but nothing took it away.
It bothered him.
It drove him crazy.
Every time he fell,
it made him feel worse.
It kept him from
looking other people in the eye.
It humbled him.
It hunched him over a bit.

Oh, there were times
when he felt he was overcoming it.
But then when he fell again,
he would hear a voice from the past –
a message from what the preachers

who used to say about it,
“Pride comes before the fall.”

It made him give up.
“Oh it," he would say,
"It! I guess it's me –
and it's me for the rest of my life.”

But no, wrong, surprise.
Changes, healings, happen
sometimes only after

one hits the bottom of it.

It got him half way up.
It got him to his knees.
It got him to go to church.
It got him to confess to himself, to God,
“Bless me Father for I have sinned….”
It got him to talk to someone about it.
It got him to realize it was desire,
the hungering desire at the bottom
of every human being.
It got him to realize God is the
deepest desire at the bottom
of every human being.

It got him to Christ.

Christ, whom he saw

as a main break,
Christ, Living Water,

Christ, bursting open with water
flowing – streaming –
rivering all over him,

soaking him totally.
It gave him the feeling
of being washed clean –
in a pool of clear water –
in a bath of love.

He felt healed.

It had gone away – at least
for a day – then he felt
it was away for a week –
then a month, then a year.

He was dealing with it a day at a time.

It made him feel stronger.
It gave him understanding of others.
It got him to stop blaming others.
It got him to drop rocks.
It got him to feel loved
and to return that love.

It got him to stand up
and walk straight – tall
all the days of the rest of his life.

Christ was no longer an it.

NUNS

Quote of the Day:  March 15, 2010



"For Catholics before Vatican II, the land of the free was pre-emimently the land of Sister Says - except, of course, for Sister, for whom it was the land of Father Says."



Wilfred Sheed, Frank and Maisie: A Memoir with Parents, 1985 - I find this a great quote for table talk - for us pre-Vatican II Catholics. One can still spot on TV every once in a while the old movie, "The Bells of St. Mary's" [1945]. Bing Crosby as Father Chuck O'Malley has to deal with the incumbent superior of St. Mary's parish convent and school, Sister Mary Benedict played by Ingrid Bergman. She might give Wilfred pause before making his quote a second time. Great stuff for Catholics over 60. "The Bells of St. Mary's" is the sequel to the 1944 movie, "Going My Way." In this earlier movie, Father Chuck O'Malley doesn't have to deal with nuns - but his pastor, Father Fitzgibbon, played by Barry Fitzgerald - as well as two earlier romantic interests, Genevieve and Carol.