Once upon a time - a wise woman - in her early 60’s - but
she looked like she was in her late 40’s - because she was a serious walker -
well she came up with a million dollar idea.
She was at the beach - one beautiful summer evening with
her granddaughter - and the two of them were just sitting there - finishing off
-cold giant vanilla milk shakes. They were sitting on those hard wooden benches
on the boardwalk - looking out at the ocean. But sometimes hard wooden benches
are not even felt - on one’s butt - when you have a beautiful ocean right in
front of you.
And the waves that evening were big and beautiful -
crashing and splashing - like Schiller’s Ode
to Joy at the end of Beethoven’s 9th Symphony - or Louis Armstrong singing, “What
A Wonderful World.”
Grandma said to her 11 year old granddaughter - Deborah -
who was aware of everything - “What’s that man doing down there with the ear
phones and some kind of stick with a plate on the end of the stick?”
“Grandma - haven’t you ever seen someone with a metal
detector? He’s down here every evening searching for coins in the sand that
people lost that day.”
“You’re kidding?”
“Nope. Just watch him. He’s getting rich by the minute.
Look, there he goes. He probably just found another quarter. Notice how his
backpack is getting bloated.”
“I just got a great idea Deborah - a million dollar
idea.”
“What is it grandma? Tell me your secret. Tell me your
million dollar idea?”
“I’m going to invent a hurt detector.”
“Great idea grandma. Great idea. Tell me more. I hurt
sometimes.”
“Well Deborah, you know I’m a psychiatrist?”
“I knew that grandma. You’re a shrink. I’ve heard people
talk about you behind your back and everyone says you’re great at what you do. You have people coming to you with all kinds
of problems, right?”
“Yep, that’s what I do.”
“I’ve noticed my two older sisters often talk to you when
they have problems - and you - well you just
listen, listen, listen. Nice.”
“Well, Deborah, sometimes I use the old couch method of
helping people - not all the time - but sometimes - especially when people
don’t seem to be telling me - what’s
bothering them.”
“You have a couch in your office? Do people ever fall asleep.”
“Yes to your first question. And yes to your second
question.”
Deborah then asked, “Okay grandma, pretend that I’m a
psychiatrist. Close your eyes and tell me all about your hurt detector?”
“Okay, everybody
has deep down hurts in their life that
they can’t deal with, but they keep them in - and hurts are covered with
sandpaper - when they rub someone the wrong way.”
“Well, I’m going to have a person lay down on my couch.
I’m going to take out my stethoscope and show it to the person I’m with -
calling it my “Hurt Detector”. And like the man there with the metal detector -
I’ll move it around their skull and ask
them, ‘Where do you hurt?’ Or, ‘Tell me about something someone did to you that
you can’t forgive - or something you did, that you can’t forgive yourself for?”
“Their eyes will be closed as I move my stethoscope
around the top of their head. But, I’ll
be watching their face very, very carefully.”
“As they are thinking, I’ll see their face or their
closed eyes, squint or squeeze at certain moments. I’ll spot hurt signals from
their minds - showing up on the skin of
their face.”
“Actually I do this already, but now I’ll have a gadget -
which I’ll call my ‘Hurt Detector’. I hope I don’t get sued. I’ll run this by a
few people.”
“Then I’ll say - when I see them wince or flinch. ‘That
one. Tell me what you were thinking about just then.’ And just then - they’ll
tell me about some hurt memory. It will be a divorce or a teacher or a coach
whom they thought was unfair to them. Or they will tell me about something they
did dumb to hurt someone else somewhere along the time line of their life.”
“Then, and this might surprise you Deborah, but I’ll tell
them about Jesus’ great message of forgiveness. Forgiveness is not for the
other person for starters, but for the person who can’t forgive or be
forgiven.”
Deborah said, “You’re going to give them religion. I
thought you were a psychiatrist and not a priest?”
The answer once more is ‘Yes’ to your first question and
‘Yes’ to your second question.
“Deborah,” her grandma said, “everyone needs to learn how
to forgive and be forgiven - at least 77 times in their life time as Jesus put
it. That means a lot of times. Otherwise
the hurt messes up one’s soul and body - and that’s where millions in health
care will be saved. The stuff of the soul can hurt the stuff of the body - so
that’s why I said this is a million dollar idea.”
“Interesting grandma.”
“Yes, Deborah,
thanks.”
“You’re a good listener, Deborah. Maybe one day you’ll be
a psychiatrist. When thinking about forgiveness
- people always put things out there - into God and into others. Jesus and my hurt detector will get people
finding out that it’s what’s under the sand of our soul - or what’s in our
inner room as Jesus put it, that counts.”
It seems that the word, “heroine” has dropped out - and
that our heroes can be male and female.
Just walk into any home, business, organization, government
building, church - and we’ll see images of heroes - people who are examples and
models of the values of that organization or that family.
Statues, pictures, images of great people sit atop of horses
and pedestals in our parks and museums and government buildings - as well as
churches.
Today we celebrate Joseph as hero.
He was the model husband, father figure, protector of
Mary and Jesus.
In the scriptures he gets little press, but the press
that he gets, says he was righteous. Since
that sometimes has negative connotations, I prefer saying, “He got it right.” It
says he was a dreamer. He was a presence. He was a protector.
In the history of the Church - he comes down as a
hero. He is an example of a good worker
- a carpenter.
He is a dreamer - and I wonder if this is a way in the
scriptures of connecting him to the great Joseph - the Master Dreamer - as he
is described in the book of Genesis. That Joseph gets a lot more press - and a
lot more information about his personality.
Most Catholics have images of St. Joseph - always off to
the side - background security for Jesus and Mary. I say off to the side also,
because in many Catholic Churches his statue or picture is off to the
side. We’ve all heard people talk about
the St. Joseph side of the church and Mary’s side of the church. Here at St.
John Neumann - as well as St. Mary’s -
St. Joseph is on the left - facing the front of the church and Our Lady of
Perpetual Help on the Right facing the altar.
In our time Joseph has become best known in popular myth
and meaning as the statue to bury upside down in your yard - or flower pot - if
you want to sell your house. I’ve heard people say, “It works.”
I don’t po po that, because I think religion needs humor
- the ability to laugh at all kinds of stuff.
Mine is to laugh at bishop’s hats and cardinal’s outfits.
I rather see Joseph as the patron of fathers as presence
and protector.
I rather see Joseph as worker - a great stress when the
communist party was stronger in Italy and Europe.
I rather see Joseph as the Patron of a Happy Death - I
assume and assumption based on Joseph being older than Mary and dying somewhere
in there before Jesus’ public ministry.
What’s next?
In reading the work - the writings of Elizabeth Johnson -
who is a Sister of St. Joseph - from around my time at OLPH Brooklyn - taught
by the Josephites - I see she explores more and more the feminine and mother side
of God. Pope John Paul the 1st, Albino
Luciani, spoke about that as Cardinal and a tiny bit as pope. He only lasted a
month. We are made in the image and likeness of God - male and female he made
us.
All my life as priest I have wondered about the Catholic
Church’s great stress on Mary - and I wonder - wonder - that’s the word I’m
using. I do not know what I am talking about when it comes to this. But I
wonder if because we stress the masculinity of God - the femininity of God has
to show up somewhere. Protestants think we see Mary as God. We don’t. But I
wonder about all this at times. I see the feminine side of God in Mary and I
Hope we all see God in all of us - male and female.
So if we explore the feminine side of the image of God,
will Joseph get more stress - on the masculine side?
I don’t know.
Enough.
Ooops I neglected to say more on Joseph as hero - the
title of this homily - maybe not. He is someone we look up to. Amen.