DIVORCE

INTRODUCTION

The title of my homily is, “Divorce.”

The word “divorce” jumps off the page of today’s gospel – so I decided to line up some thoughts and wonderings about divorce.

What does the word “divorce” trigger for you?

Today’s first reading from the second chapter of Genesis proclaims God saying, “It is not good for us to be alone. We need a suitable partner.”

So God made all the animals and brought them to the First Man. It’s great story telling. And no animal was a suitable partner. “Woof! Woof. Meow. Meow. Chirp. Chirp.” Sorry. Sorry.

So God puts the man into a deep sleep and takes from the man one of his ribs and closes up the spot with flesh. Then God builds the first woman. If you know the book of Genesis, you know this is the second creation account in the book – but it’s much more primitive and filled with great symbolism. It gives us our human dimension. The first creation account – in the first chapter of Genesis, but not as old, gives us our God dimension, “God created man in the image of himself, in the image of God he created him, male and female he created them.”

In today’s creation account we have this earlier story and the God who made the first man out of the mud and clay of the earth, steps down to earth for the creation of woman.

I love James Weldon Johnson’s creation account where he has God say, “I’m Lonely, I’ll make me a world.” (1)

I love Bill Cosby’s creation account where he has Adam say when he first sees Eve, “Woo Man!”

Then today’s first reading from Genesis jumps in time to a reflection: the two should leave their father and mother and cling to each other – and the two shall become one flesh. Cling implying rib to rib cling. Great static cling. Very important.

Marriage – weddings – celebration. We’ve been to many of them and we drink, dance, lift our glass and celebrate and sometimes we look and wonder at the couple – in tux and gown. Will they make it? We pray for them. We look ahead and hope for them.

Will they be the part of the 60 % who make it or the 40% who don’t?

Divorce statistics are very tricky – and vary very much.

Divorce. Disaster. Mess. What do they do with the wedding pictures and the keepsakes in a box under a bed or in a closet? What happens to that little couple that was on top of their wedding cake?

WE KNOW

We know about divorce. It happens in our families or with our neighbors or with our friends. Messy. Never easy. Difficult. And we don’t know what to say. I know I don’t.

As priest sometimes it seems absolutely smart, right, best for these two – that they get divorced – but then sometimes because of kids, there is the feeling of hesitation.

And we know that many couples have stayed together because of the kids – and sometimes that seems the right thing to do – and sometimes it seems like that it is a mistake as well – because sometimes the kids sense the tension – and hear the word fights – and it’s tearing them apart as well.

Divorce. Mixed feelings. Drama. Pain. Hurt. Questions. Wonderings.

What are your thoughts and questions and wonderings about divorce? I’m wondering: what would be helpful words from the pulpit?

And I feel guilty at times, because I wish I had better skills and better advice and answers when listening to a couple in a problem marriage. Their marriage just isn’t working the way it should be working. I try to get them to go for counseling. Sometimes they do and sometimes only one wants to. Sometimes couples make the Retrouvaille Seminar – a Marriage Encounter type weekend program for problem marriages - and that helps. (3) Sometimes nothing helps.

COKIE ROBERTS AND SAM DONALDSON

A good bunch of years back I was watching television one Sunday morning in between Masses. Well, Sam Donaldson says to Cokie Roberts, something like this, “Cokie, you’re Catholic. What’s going on with this Kennedy fight up in Massachusetts? He got an annulment and she is contesting it. What’s the story? I think she wrote a book in protest.” (4)

And Cokie said something that I found remarkably clear. She said the Catholic Church proclaims a theology of marriage that says: marriage between two baptized Christians is a lifetime covenant. The teaching is that these two vow to stay together in sickness and in health, in good times and in bad, till death do they part. And Cokie said that the Church has to teach this. Unless you go into marriage with the idea that this is it for life, you won’t struggle as hard to make it last for a lifetime. The couple needs that for themselves as well as if they are blessed with kids.

Then Cokie said, “Sometimes things fall apart. Sometimes there are disasters.. The couple get divorced. People are living much longer and more people were getting divorced. So the Church relooked at annulments to see if we can do something to help people start again and remain in communion with the Church community – if they get re-married. Pastoral theology called for this."

I thought then and I still think now: her description on what happened in our Church was a good assessment. Obviously, more has to be done to strengthen marriages as well as to help folks who had disastrous marriages to stay with the Church. They need the sacraments more than ever. “It is not good to be alone. It’s good to have a partner.”

CONTEXT

I would assume that context is a key issue in all this as well as much of life. That’s a good word and concept to do a lot of thinking about: context.

Cokie Roberts was trying to give context.

Whenever we hear about a couple getting a divorce, what is the context of these two people?

That’s one of the reasons why the annulment process is a long process. Sometimes it looks like a crazy or too difficult a process. Hopefully, it helps people to not only see what happened, but to take a deep look at their life patterns – family patterns – who they are and where they have come from – and areas where they have to grow – otherwise we are repeat performances – and déjà vu is our modus operandi.

What’s the context?

We don’t know the context of so many things – not only why and what someone said or someone did, but the whole process.

I assume that’s one reason Jesus said not to judge. [Cf. Matthew 7:1-5]

I assume that’s why the Native American saying, “Don’t judge someone till you have walked a mile in their moccasins.”

I would add, “till you have walked a mile in their sins.”

In today’s gospel Jesus says there is to be no divorce – nobody can separate what God has joined together.

What is the context that Jesus was looking at? As best as I can gather, women in the time of Jesus were treated as second class citizens or had no citizenship in a marriage. They didn’t have the rights of males. They could be dismissed or dumped and divorced for various reasons.

In the time of Jesus marriages were not just about two people. Marriages were arranged by families – without much choice by the couple to be married.

In the time of Jesus children were not seen like children of today are seen. I was surprised that the gospel a few weeks ago called a child an “it” instead of he or she. (Cf. 25 Sunday OT B, Mark 9: 36)

In the time of Jesus, if there was a divorce, often whole families would end up in the feud.

In the time of Jesus most people did not live as long as folks are living today – so are we asking people who are divorced and get remarried without benefit of an annulment, to stay away from communion for the rest of their marriage?

That’s context. [5]

TWO BOOKS

I recently read two books that were eye openers. The Bookseller of Kabul was the first. (6) It was written by a Norwegian woman journalist, Asne Seierstad. She went into Kabul in Afghanistan two weeks after the September 11th attacks. She met a bookseller in Kabul named Shah Muhammad Rais. He spoke English and he invited her into his home for a few months. Being a journalist she decided to write a whole book about her experience. She changed his name in her book to Sultan Khan – and it’s a sort of fictionalized non-fiction. He sends his first wife off to Pakistan and buys a new wife – aged 16.

In her book, she gives the context for women in Afghanistan. It’s horrible. It was worse under the Taliban. It’s still horrible. The book takes the reader into the back room – into the inner workings of Afghan family life. As I was reading it, I sensed that it’s closer to what family life might be in a Nazareth village 2000 years ago.

The second book is entitled, When Men Become Gods (7). It’s an investigation by a man named Stephen Singular. The book gives you an inside view into the life of Warren Jeffs – leader of an offshoot Mormon group. It tells about countless young girls who are manipulated into polygamy by Warren Jeffs and his group.

Both books were page turners. I the reader was given the context of life as a woman in Afghanistan and life as a woman in various Mormon polygamy situations in Utah, Texas – and various places where Warren Jeff’s was operating.

Women in some countries have certainly come a long way – and when they discover horrible, unredeemable, abuse, hopefuly they can learn to run – but with great difficulty.

IN THE MEANWHILE

In the meanwhile, each of us ought to do what we can do to strengthen life in the context we live and work in.

I remember a continuing education course I took in New York under Father Benedict Groeschel. He told us he was asked by Cardinal Cooke to be the person the Cardinal would send a priest who wanted to leave the priesthood.

The priest had fallen in live or become angry with the institutional church or had become disillusioned. I listened up – because I was ordained in 1965 and saw lots of priests leave. Talk about divorce. They left our communities. Half my ordination class of 16 left. And it was not only a blow to the places where they were living and working, but also on our lives. So I think I know the impact of divorce – without seeing it in my own immediate family.

As Benedict listened to these priests, he began to see it was too late. Many were already involved with someone. Their minds have been made up and they wanted out of the priesthood.

So he told us, we need to do things now to strengthen what we have, before a problem would arise. The goal of the course was to come up with a whole group of priests to serve as spiritual directors – to get priests talking to other priests about their life.

When a couple come to me with a marriage that is falling apart, if the timing is right, I ask a key question, “Is there someone else?” That’s a whole different ballgame. That’s a whole different context.

In the meanwhile, here we are in Church this Sunday morning. If you are married, what does your marriage look like? What is the context you’re living in?

CONCLUSION: THREE RECOMMENDATIONS

Let me make three recommendations for strengthening a marriage.

1) Communication: shut off the TV and talk. Shut off the zillion and one gadgets and communicate with each other. Talk about the context of your marriage, family, life, how you’ve grown, how you’ve taken each other for granted. Listen. Listen. Listen to each other. The opening question is always, “How’s it going?” or “What’s happening?” or “Where are we?” And listen – listen – listen.

2) Compliment: I love to tell the story about the grandfather whose 8 year old granddaughter took his wedding ring off his finger. They were sitting and talking with each other on a couch. The girl looked at the ring. Then inside the ring, she sees the letters, “SSNTST”.

The little girl says, “Grandpa what do those letters stand for?”

He says, “Oh something. Just something.”

Well, the little girl wouldn’t let up. She had to find out what the letters, “SSNTST” stood for.

Finally the grandfather says, “Okay Jessica, but you have to promise you won’t tell anyone.”

She says, “I promise I won’t tell anyone.”

So her grandpa says, “Well, after your grandma and I were married we got too used to each other, so I felt something was wrong. I went to a priest and we talked. He listened and said, 'Take your wedding ring to a jeweler and have him engrave inside your wedding ring, the letters, ‘SSNTST.' Like you, I asked him what does that mean. He said, ‘Say Something Nice To Sara Today.’ And I’ve been doing that ever since.”

Jessica still holding the ring said, “That’s really beautiful!”

Then she jumped off the couch and ran into the kitchen yelling, “Grandma, grandma, let me show you something that grandpa has on his wedding ring about you.”

Yesterday after a wedding at St. Mary’s, I’m standing in the back of the church with the daughter of the videographer for the wedding. I think that’s who she was. Without knowing it, she compliments me by saying, “Great wedding. You know what I’m going to do when I get home today. I’m going up to my husband and thank him and hug him to death for marrying me.”

I said, “Thanks for making my day.”

3) Surprises: Three weeks ago at a wedding rehearsal, the father of the groom said that an old man one time told him the secret of a happy marriage. It went something like this, “Provide surprises and give unexpected gifts to spouse on a regular basis.” And he told me that it has really worked in his marriage – and I said, “Can I steal that message from you?” He said, “Of course.” I said, “Thank you.”

It’s like sticking that famous bumper sticker, “”Practice Random Acts of Kindness and Senseless Acts of Beauty” on your marriage.

Enough already. What’s happening with you? What’s context are you in right now?



NOTES

(1) The Book of American Negro Poetry, Ed. James Weldon Johnson, New York, Harcourt, Brace and Co., 1922

(2) Bill Cosby, Cf. Audio Tapes on Creation Account

(3) Type “Retrouvaille” in your computer search engine check out what this seminar type program is about.

(4) Type into your search engine, Joseph Kennedy’s marriage to Sheila Rauch and her 1997 book, Shattered Faith.

(5) For exploring the context of this text from Mark, confer, Social-Science Commentary on the Synoptic Gospels by Bruce J. Malina and Richard L. Rohrbaugh, pp. 240-242. Cf. also Gaudium et Spes, The Pastoral Constitution on the Church in the Modern World, Part II, Chapter 1, "Fostering The Nobility of Marriage and the Family," pp.248-258 in the Walter M. Abbot, General Editor, edition, 1966; Cf. also Catechism of the Catholic Church, Liguori Publications, 1994, 1601-1666, 2380-2400, -

(6) Asne Seierstad, The Bookseller of Kabul (2003)

(7) Stephen Singular, When Men Become Gods, (2008)

BETTER SHUT UP

Those who know, don't talk;
those who don't know, talk.



Today, September 30th, being the feast day of Saint Jerome, the above is a paraphrasing of something he wrote, "It is still worse to be ignornant of your ignorance." © Andy Costello, 2009

DEMONS:
AND LEAD US NOT INTO TEMPTATION,
BUT DELIVER US FROM EVIL. AMEN.

INTRODUCTION

I’m not sure whether to give my homily a one word short title: “Demons” or to give it a long, long title: “Demons: And Lead Us Not Into Temptation, But Deliver Us From Evil. Amen.”

My hope is that you reflect upon demons and prayer.


Suggestion. One of my ongoing suggestions in homilies has been to use one’s rosary not just for Hail Mary’s.*

Suggestion, better recommendation: Be evangelists and catechists. Give your kids rosary beads and tell them they can use a rosary for all kinds of prayers. I have suggested using a rosary to say 59 times – with the 59 beads of the rosary – one word prayers, like “Thanks!” or “Help!” or “Peace!” or three word prayers, “Lord have mercy!” “Come Holy Spirit!” or switch them around for the different decades – or just use one decade.

Please do that! It works. Or recommend to your kids or others to take a rosary and use them to name 59 people they remember and want God to bless or Mary to bless or what have you. Or use them like Moslems sometimes use their so called “Worry Beads,” their 33 beads, which they go through 3 times, coming up with 99 names for God. We can do it for 59 names for God or for Jesus Christ, the Son of God: “Light!” “Joy” “Happiness” “Peace” “Creator” “Lord.” “Savior” “Friend” “Presence” “Eucharist” and on and on and on.

Today my suggestion – my recommendation is for you – not just your kids. Take your rosary and use the 59 beads to say just part of the Our Father, “And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil. Amen.”

TEN TIMES

“And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil. Amen.”
“And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil. Amen.”
“And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil. Amen.”
“And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil. Amen.”
“And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil. Amen.”
“And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil. Amen.”
“And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil. Amen.”
“And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil. Amen.”
“And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil. Amen.”
“And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil. Amen.”

In 49 seconds I just said that prayer 10 times. I know it was 10 times because I used a rosary – which is a counting device.

If I just said “Help” 10 times, it would be 9 seconds.

THIS ROSARY

This rosary beads is the saddest rosary beads I have ever been given. They came in an envelope after a funeral I did for someone. The family gave them to me. I already have several rosaries. I said to myself, “Why didn’t they keep them for themselves as a memory of their dad who died – who obviously prayed with them many times over? They are well used.”

The message on the envelope was that their dad got the rosary in Palestine.

I am not supposed to judge, but at the funeral, nobody seemed to know when to sit or stand or know the prayers of the Mass – so I didn’t know if they were Catholics or if they were Catholics any longer.

That was an even more reason why I would hope they keep their dad’s rosary – to remind them to pray.

That’s another reason why I recommend using a rosary beads to say Hail Mary’s or other prayers with the hope the person would pray in Jesus’ name as we heard in today’s gospel.

RANGER ROSARY

This parish is known around the world now for the Ranger Rosary. I think that’s great, wonderful, amazing. For the past few years now, thanks to various people in this parish, Ranger Rosaries keep on being made and shipped to our men and women in our Armed Service. The men and women around the world in the Armed Services have in hand – or pocket – a reminder and a help – a perpetual help – to pray – to say the Hail Mary’s and the Our Father and the other prayers of the rosary.

And as we Catholics also know, rosaries are kept in pockets, around necks, on rear view mirrors, as visible reminders to pray for God’s protection and help each day.

THIS HOMILY

In this homily this morning I’m also suggesting using your rosary to say the last part of the Our Father, “And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil. Amen.”

DEMONS: TODAY’S GOSPEL – TODAY’S READINGS

Now a few words about demons – and temptations and tests – and my hope is you understand the gist of my words.

Today’s gospel and today’s readings are tough stuff.

The gospel begins with John saying to Jesus, “Teacher, we saw someone driving out demons in your name, and we tried to prevent him because he does not follow us.”

To understand the gospels and the writings in the Bible, we not only have to remember it’s from thousands of years ago – when people understood not only the sun and the moon and the stars differently – but also body and mind health very differently.

Demons lurked everywhere and understanding a bit about demons can help us understand the scriptures better.

In his Dictionary of the Bible, John L. McKenzie S.J. under Demons and Demonology, says that the beliefs and understandings of the people of Mesopotamia regarding demons had a great influence on the way the people of Israel saw life. Literature and art from that area and time tell us that people thought there were countless demons roaming around – outside and inside people. To counteract evil demons you had to know their name and chant the name of a more powerful god – hence Jesus’ name became very powerful and important – for some people.

Listen to this list of demons and what part of the body they attacked. People would chant the demon’s name to try to get them to leave. It’s a very interesting way of understanding health care.

· The demon named, “Ashakku” attacked the head.
· The demon named, “Utukku” attacked the neck.
· The demon named, “Namtaru” attacked the throat.
· The demon named, “Alu” attacked the chest.
· The demons named, “Etimmu” and “Ilu” attacked the hand.
· The demon named, “Gallu” attacked the foot.

“Pazuzu”, he thinks, was probably the demon in the South West wind that brought the infection of malaria.

I was wondering whether the words “Atchoo” which people say when they sneeze or “shoo” when they want someone or something to go away – are somehow in this mix of sounds.

In one way, Jesus moved amongst people who were dealing with a lot more medical problems than we have in our day – while on the other hand, most people died very young.

In the meanwhile Jesus said, “Stop worrying about people using my name, but in the meanwhile give cups of water to people to drink.”

Then Jesus gets into deeper sicknesses – sins – giving bad example to kids – or the sins of the eyes – what we see, the sins of the feet where we go – entering into hell – going into places like Gehenna – the garbage dump in Jerusalem – that was always smelly and burning.

Now of course, Jesus doesn’t want us to gauge out our eyes or cut off our hands and feet – but he does challenge us to make deep cutting decisions in our life – to cut and run from what is destroying us.

Question: What are your demons? What are your temptations? What are your sins? What are your addictions? What’s killing you?

Today’s first reading talks about jealousy and sniping about others.

Today’s second reading talks about avarice and hoarding – the opposite of generosity. Today’s second reading from James talks about unfair wages – and fat cating it.

Tough stuff – some of the ongoing temptations of life – practices unfortunately our kids can pick up from us – by our bad example – and bad example to young people Jesus warns this morning is a big no, no. It would be better if a great millstone was tied to our neck and we were thrown into the sea.

CONCLUSION

Young people also pick up good example – generosity, acts of kindness, giving of our time, treasure and talents – as well as cups of water to the thirsty.

The title of my homily is, “Demons: And Lead Us Not Into Temptation, But Deliver Us From Evil. Amen.”

My action step recommendation is to use a rosary to say that prayer 10 times each day or 59 times each day. Maybe someone will see you with your rosary in hand and ask, “What are you doing? Or what’s that beady thing in your hand?” Go for it!



*Cf. Chapter 22, "Rosary Beads Aren't Just For Hail Mary's Any More, in the book, Thank God It's Friday, by Andrew Costello, The Thomas More Press, Chicago, Illinois, 1987, [Out of Print]

A CUP OF WATER

[In today’s gospel for the 26th Sunday in Ordinary Time, Year B, Jesus tells us to give each other cups of water – so I made up this story for today’s Children’s Mass. It’s a reminder to make sure we give cups of water to each other. Amen.]

The 8th grade of St. Henry’s Catholic School in Aurora, Oklahoma, visits a nursing home just across the street from their school as a way of putting their Christian faith into practice.

Each Wednesday after lunch, the 28 kids in the 8th grade, walk across the street with their teacher, Mrs. Julia Washington, and stop in to see different folks who are living there in the Aurora Springs Nursing Home, Aurora, Oklahoma.

The mostly older folks living there – as well as the nursing home staff – look forward to the kids’ visit every Wednesday. The kids are great. Old folks, as well as the nursing home staff, need to see young folks. The kids are trained very well by their teacher, Mrs. Julia, whose mom is in a similar nursing home in Oklahoma City. She found out that no kids or volunteers drop in to see her mom or those in her mom’s nursing home. She found this out because each Sunday afternoon she drives the 137 miles to Oklahoma City to see her mom.

Mrs. Julia, as the kids call her, their 8th grade teacher, trained her class on just what to do each Wednesday afternoon when they walk over to the nursing home. Mrs. Julia scouted the nursing home out and with the help of the head nurse and the activities director, she lined up 14 folks who would love a visit on a regular basis. The kids were assigned in teams of two to the person whom they were to visit. It was just like the way Jesus sent his disciples out – two by two.

The 8th grade kids would bring art work from their younger brothers and sisters as well as from 1st and 2nd grade kids whom they would also visit and tell about their visits to the old folks across the street in Aurora Springs Nursing Home. They would also have a question of the week for their assigned person in the nursing home – and sometimes they would bring muffins or flowers or home made chocolate chip cookies to the person they were visiting.

It was a great plan – and the 8th grade kids got more out of it than the person they were visiting.

Well, one evening, at supper, an 8th grader named Cory Branch, was asked by his dad, “How was your visit to Mr. Mannix this afternoon?”

And Cory told the following story about Mr. Tim Mannix whom he and his classmate Teri would visit every Wednesday afternoon.

“Teri and I went in and our question of the day was to ask our guest to tell us the ten top memories of that person’s life. I was the reporter, the questioner, and Teri was the one who had to write down the answers.

“I said to Mr. Mannix, ‘We have to make a report on the ten top memories of your life. So please help us with our homework.’

“Mr. Mannix smiled. ‘No problem Teri and Cory,’ he answered. ‘You’ll get an A with my answers.’

“Dad, mom, his mind is still very sharp. In fact, Mr. Mannix said, ‘This is like a question from David Letterman. Okay, let me start with #10 and go to # 1 – the most important thing I think that I have done in my life – or at least my best memory.’

“‘Number 10: When I was a junior in high school, I pitched a no hitter in baseball.

“‘Number 9: My mother had a cousin who was the Governor of Wyoming in the 1930’s – so that makes me a cousin of someone who was a governor and we used to visit him from time to time.

“‘Number 8: Did you know that I played minor league baseball? I made it to the Major Leagues one September – but that was when they call everyone up and there are at least 40 players on the bench. But I did get up to pinch hit 3 times and pinch run 2 times in the Major Leagues. That was it. But nobody ever asked me to give them an autograph.

“‘Number 7: I was in World War II and was captured by the Germans and spent 2 years in a German Prison Camp. I thought I was going to die many times – but I survived – and when the U.S. Army made it to our prison camp, I had lost 48 pounds.

“‘Number 6: I had a brother who was in navy and he was killed in World War II when his ship sank. I didn’t find out about this till after the war was over and I came back to the United States.

“‘Number 5: After the War I went to college and got a degree – thanks to the G.I. Bill of Rights. I became an engineer and worked with aluminum – in fact, I was part of the team that helped make aluminum cans for soda and beer.

“‘Number 4: I became president of a company that made racing bicycles – and Lance Armstrong used one of our bikes to win the Tour de France 3 different times – and we all got to meet him.

“‘Number 3: I am ¾ American Indian – and have written a book about my grandfather who was a full blooded Creek Indian.

“‘Number 2: I was married to a wonderful woman named Mary. She was the love of my life – but we weren’t blessed with kids – so that’s why it’s so wonderful that you and Teri come here every Wednesday. And my Mary died very early of cancer at the age of 36. That was a tough one. That is a rough memory.’

“Well, when he came to # 1, he paused and started to cry a bit. Teri and I got a bit nervous at first – but his tears were coming down a face that had a beautiful smile. We just sat there and waited. Then he told us what he felt was the best thing he ever did in his life – and he said it was his best memory.

“‘When I was a young kid my dad had a stroke and he couldn’t talk. We didn’t have any nursing homes or places like this at the time. My mom had to go out to work in a factory – to make money for my dad, my older brother and I. So when I got home from school in the afternoon – except during the baseball season – I would sit with my dad and talk and talk and talk – and he would listen, listen, listen.

“‘After a while, and this was what became the most beautiful moment. My dad would signal for water. At first I would get it out of the faucet. Now this was before this new thing called, “Bottled Water.” Then I found out he loved iced water. I would get ice cubes and really cold up that water – in a big pitcher of water I kept for him in our ice box. That’s what we had before refrigerators. I was doing this for years – every day – and he would almost say every time, “Thank you.” He loved cold water.

“‘Then surprise I’m in church this one Sunday and the priest said in his sermon that Sunday morning, “Want to be a good Christian? Simply give each other glasses of cold water!”

“‘Looking back at my life, I consider doing that was the most important thing I did in my life – giving my dad glasses of cold water for over 12 years till he died at the young age of 44.’”

Then Cory said, “We were crying hearing his wonderful story – then Teri spoke up and said, ‘Mr. Mannix can Cory and I have your autograph.’

“And he signed her notes – and next week I’m bringing a baseball in for him to sign.”

[P. S. Someone asked after Mass if there was an Aurora, Oklahoma and I answered, "As far as I know, no. The story is an imaginary story - with hopes that it could become real."]

WHY WE NEED ETERNITY?

There is never enough time ....
Missed opportunities.

Too many of them….
Funerals we couldn’t attend.
Conversations never finished
or much more significant:
conversations we should have had.
Lots of questions,
especially, “What ever happened
to what’s her or his name?”
Forgiveness – with an eventual end
to every “I’m sorry for ….” as well as

forgiving those who trespassed against us.
A chance for a zillion tears and laughs.
Healings. Many healings….
Surprises – that bring laughter
and many a big, “O my God!”

And then God - will it be

the big wedding banquet

with God at the big table

and on the dance floor

dressed quests galore

or will it be walks with God

in a garden

in the cool of the evening?

I'm dying to find out...

but not yet!

© Andy Costello, Reflections, 2009

THE GEOGRAPHY OF THE SOUL

INTRODUCTION

The title of my homily is, “The Geography of the Soul.”

For some reason, today’s readings triggered that phrase, “The Geography of the Soul”. I said to myself, “What does that mean? Where did that come from?”

GEOGRAPHY

“G E” or “G E O” is the Greek word for “earth” – as in “geography,” “geometry,” “geoeconomics”, or “geodesic” and “GRAPHO” is the Greek word for “writing” as in “geography,” “photography” and “graphite”. Graphite - or lead – which people discovered could be used to wrote with. Pencils could be used besides pen and ink.

Geography – understanding where one is on the earth or the neighborhood. When we want to get from A to B – how do we get there? Even men ask for directions from time to time.

Geography – using word of mouth, maps, restaurant napkins, to tell someone or to jot down how to get from here to there. Can you draw me a map? Can you give me directions? Do you know what road to take?

With GPS we might be losing something. I’ve heard that.

The little baby begins in the dark inner globe of her mom. She kicks and pushes to learn how far her geography goes. Then as babies we look, point, crawl, stand up and begin to discover more and more of our geography: our home – our street – our yards – our playgrounds – our classrooms – and slowly the world.

How good were you in school with geography? Were you one of those kids that loved maps? How good are you in giving directions?

THE GEOGRAPHY OF THE SOUL

The title of my homily is, “The Geography of the Soul.” We know the geography of our bodies – our look – our scars – our wrinkles – our shape – healed bones that were broken – at times our left hip has a tiny tinge of an ache that is different than our right hip.

We know the geography of our bodies – male and female – tall, short, thin, fat, skin color, hair, no hair, cancer, operations. I have a piece of lead – in my finger here. It’s been here since the 4th grade when a boy in my class stabbed me in a pencil dueling fight. I lost.

What does our soul look like? Of course it’s invisible – but we know we have a soul – whether we call it a “soul” or not.

We know the difference between Jack our next door neighbor – who was just cutting his lawn two weeks ago or so – and four days later we were standing there at his body – in a casket at the funeral home. Same body – but so different dead than when alive.

The soul, life, his spirit, went out of him.

We have a soul, personality, spirit. Jack was so different than his wife, Jill, or his son who grew up with our son. We can be as different to each other as Annapolis is to Topeka, Kansas or to Paris, France.

That’s outside geography.

Inside we have our memories and our museums – our trophy cases and our toxic waste dumps – our photographs and our secrets – the fights and duels we won and the wars we lost.

And Jesus tells us that we have an inner room in here – in the geography of our soul – a holy place. And Jesus often comes to our door. He knocks on our door from time to time – because he likes to visit people.

Some people have never heard about their inner room – but everyone spends time in there. It’s the place where we talk to ourselves – which we’re doing all the time.

What does our inner room look like? I picture my small room with a small table that has an open bible on it – and a candle on it – and lots and lots of stuff in boxes along the walls. The chair has varied from time to time. Sometimes it’s a straight back wooden chair with no padding; other times it’s a Lazy Boy chair that is very comfortable.

What does your inner room look like?

What does your inner geography look like?

THE LETTER OF JAMES

How many times in our life have we said, “I want to read the Bible more”? Or “I want to read the Bible some day"?

If you haven’t done it yet – I mean more than opening up the book now and then and wondering as you read a few pages – and then you put it down for another ten years, I suggest you find your Bible and sitting in your inner room, read The Letter of James. Everyone has a Bible somewhere in the geography of their home.

The Bible is a library, a collection of books, one of which is entitled, “The Letter of James.”

Walk into the library called the Bible. Open up its doors. Walk towards the end of the book. It’s on the right side in our Bible. You’ll find it. You have a gist of the geography of the Bible.

The Letter of James been the second reading the past 3 Sundays. We have it today and we’ll have it again next week. James is great for taking us up and down and around the towns of our outer and inner geography. Today he begins with contrast. We know the difference between living in a great neighborhood and a dangerous neighborhood.

We have a choice to live and breathe jealousy, selfish ambition, disorder, foul practice. Or we can live and breathe purity, peace, gentleness, compliance, mercy and good fruits – not emitting inconstancy or insincerity.

We can let our property be ugly or we can get out our garden tools and cultivate the garden of our soul and grow peace.

It’s our move. It takes digging. It takes removing rocks. It takes time.

If you travel the geography of this earth, at different spots on the globe we’ll hear gun shots and see trucks blown up with I.E.D’s. If you walk through the geography of places of government and political power – as well as churches at times, you’ll hear anger and rancor.

James is saying you’ll see and hear it out there, but the real place to look – the real geography to check out - is in the geography of our soul.

Today he asks a question we all understand: “Where do the wars and where do the conflicts among you come from? Is it not from your passions that make war within your members? You covet but do not possess. You kill and envy but you cannot obtain; you fight and wage war. You do not possess because you do not ask. You ask but do not receive, because you ask wrongly, to spend it on your passions.”

He’s saying what Jesus said. “Go within!” We’ve all heard somewhere along the line Horace Greeley’s words, which he borrowed from John Babsone Lane Soul, “Go west, young man” James is borrowing from Jesus and telling us to “Go within.” Young, middle, old man, young, middle, old woman, go within.

Take the journey into your soul. Study the geography of your soul.

DANTE

If someone ever offers a course on Dante, take it.

He gives the geography of Hell, Purgatory and Heaven – and he puts people in all three – and we’ll see ourselves in the journey.

Before I die I hope some genius makes a movie - maybe even a trilogy on Dante’s Inferno, Purgatorio, and Paradiso. I would even take a musical, if someone put it together. I know T.S. Eliot dabbled in Dante, but there is a great big geography to unearth.

In the Inferno, Dante takes his readers into the geography of the soul. “Abandon hope all you who enter here.” But if we enter, and make the journey, we can come out of hell with hope. We’ll see rivers and boats, mountains and trails – and on the way we see the deadly side of the 7 deadly sins. We see parodies and parables on what each sin does.

He puts popes and political figures in the depths of hell. While he was writing and imagining his imaginings, I can picture him loving to have a copy of People magazine or a TV and clicker in hand.

If we discover the geography of Dante’s Inferno, we discover that lust and gluttony are small ravines and pits compared to horrible landscape of pride and cruelty and abuse. Hopefully, we want to keep moving through Purgatory into Paradise.

TWO SONS

I love stories that begin with: “A man had two sons!” A man had two sons: one son traveled the whole world and saw almost every country; the other son stayed home and worked in his backyard garden each day. Question: Who saw more?

CONCLUSION

If we don’t travel within, if we don’t take things to heart, if we don’t become conscious of our unconscious motivations and inner movements, envies, jealousies and desires, then we’ll keep on repeating the same old sins and same old stories and we’ll be in a hell of a geography for the rest of our lives.

But if we see ourselves as disciples of Jesus – on the journey with him – walking the same geography as him – we can grow with him.

As we heard in today’s gospel – his disciples are arguing about who’s the greatest – who’s the most important.

Then we’ll hear Jesus calling us inside the house – within. If we go within or bring him into our inner room, then we might start to get it. We might become like the little child again discovering the geography of life – and all its wonders – this time perhaps for the first time – and we’ll scream down in the inner geography our soul, “Jesus Christ, I get it. It’s a Divine Comedy. Thanks for the directions. Thanks.”

7 – BUT IT MIGHT HAVE
BEEN 6 – OR MAYBE IT WAS 8

The title of my story is, “7, But It Might Have Been 6 or Maybe It Was 8.”

I’m not sure.

And I’m not sure how Mark and then Luke came up with the number in his gospel that we heard this morning – that I, Mary, called Magdalene, had 7 demons in me. (1)

1 is enough.

Anyway, I did have these inner demons, devils, divisive voices, roaming around inside me. Not good. Not right. Not healthy. (2)

You’re looking at one blessed person – lucky that I was born around the same time as Jesus – lucky that I was from Magdala – not that far from the Lake of Galilee and Nazareth – graced that I just happened to be standing on the edge of a crowd – the day Jesus walked into my life. (3)

I could see from moment one – that he could see right through me.

I could hear my demons saying, “Don’t have anything to do with this Jesus!” (4)

He was different from anyone I had ever met – any person I ever experienced. (5)

Being a woman I was on the edge of the crowd. (6)

Being me I was always on the edge of self-destruction.

In a way, I was dead. (7)

I am grateful that Jesus rolled the stone away from my tomb. He brought me back to life. He anointed me with love and forgiveness – understanding and joy, peace and celebration. (8)

I laughed when the Pharisees and Scribes complained that Jesus hung around with sinners. Huh? They didn’t get it. That was why he came. I celebrated that Jesus hung around sinners. (9)

They didn’t know he wanted to hang around with them – because they too had their demons.

Evidently, some people neither listen to nor acknowledge Jesus nor their demons.

If they listened to Jesus – if they realized Jesus could help them with their demons and take away their sins, then they too could have experienced the Kingdom – Good News – Everyday Joy, new life.

Jesus let me – a woman – a sinner – someone who had 6, 7 or 8 – or more demons inside of her into his circle. I who was alone was allowed to become his disciple.

Note well, this was something new – Good News – Jesus, a Rabbi, a Man, a Teacher, was allowing women into his family.

And I wasn’t the only one. You heard today about Joanna, the wife of Herod’s steward Chuza, and Susanna, and several other women. You’d like them. Great gals. (10)

As a result, we got to experience the Kingdom up close and personal. We got to hear many of Jesus’ stories. We got to see many of his healings. We got to see how various people accepted or could not accept his presence in their lives.

As a woman, men noticed me. As a woman, I noticed Jesus – and experienced the kind of love I didn’t know I was looking for all my life.

For example, Jesus taught me the power of forgiveness. I laughed at Peter when he got into the question of how many times should he forgive his brother. I always wondered if he was talking about Andrew or any brother or sister. He asked Jesus, “Was 7 times enough?” There’s that 7 again.

Jesus laughed – he didn’t worry about how many demons you had or sins you had. You could have 77 times 7 sins or hurts – and if they were keeping you from loving God or neighbor, Jesus wanted to take them away – not so you could then think you’re better than others – but that you could use that worry energy to helping one another energy. (11)

Too many people waste too much energy on their sins. They get stuck in their past mistakes – becoming self centered as a result – centering in on their mistakes – always hearing those past voices. They didn’t know Jesus was the Lamb of God who takes away the sins of our world. They didn’t know Jesus didn’t come to destroy people – but to restore people. (12)

What they don’t know is that Jesus didn’t come to take away the memories of our sins. We all remember our sins – 7 juicy ones – or maybe 6 or maybe it was 8 dumb moves of our youth or our lives. Somewhere along the line, people came to think that Jesus came to take away our memories of sins. He didn’t come to take away memories. He loved memories – that we share bread and wine and forgiveness in memory of him – that we remember his great parables – that we remember to pray.

Enough. How do I want to be remembered? I was there under the cross at Calvary. I wanted to be there for him who was always there for me. (13)

How do I want to be remembered? I went there very early that first day of the week – to be at his grave and discovered Jesus was no longer in the tomb, so I ran back to tell Peter and the disciple Jesus loved that the tomb was empty. (14)

How do I went to be remembered? Back at the tomb, the beloved disciple was the first to believe, even though he didn’t see. I want to be remembered as the first to embrace, to cling to the Risen Lord Jesus. It was just one time. Okay, I wish it was 7 or 6 or 8 times – or 70 times 7 times – but that’s what eternity is for. Amen. (15)

NOTES

(1) Luke 8:1-3; Mark 16:9

(2) Matthew 12:43-45

(3) Matthew 15:39

(4) Cf. Mark 1: 32-34; Mark 1: 23-28; Matthew 7: 21-27

(5) Cf. John 5-42 – Different woman, but I’m using the story for nuancing.

(6) Mark 27-30; Mark 3:31 – nuances.

(7) Matthew 23:27

(8) John 19: 38-18

(9) Luke 15: 1-2; Matthew 9: 10-13

(10) Luke 8:1-3

(11) Matthew 18:21-22

(12) John 1:29; Luke 4: 18-19

(13) Mark 15: 40; Matthew 27:55-56; Luke 23:49; John 19:25

(14) John 20:1-2; Matthew 28:1-8; Mark 16:1-8; Luke 24:1-12

(15) John 20: 11-18

[Painting on top: "The Repenting Magdalene" by Georges de La Tour, late 1630's.]

(This was a story I made up for a weekday Mass - Sept. 18, 2009, 24 Friday in Ordinary Time)