FRIENDSHIP
INTRODUCTION
Today’s first reading from Sirach 6: 5-17 focuses on the theme of friendship.
In this text, Sirach or Ben Sira, looks at several aspects or issues when it
comes to considering this important topic of friendships.
AQUAINTANCES AND
FRIENDS
The first issue is the difference between acquaintances and friends.
Today’s text says, “Let your acquaintances be many, but one in a
thousand your confidant.” (Verse 6:6)
The English of this Greek text
from Sirach uses the number “thousand”. I would like to know what the Greek text has,
but I couldn’t locate one at present. I know they found in Cairo, Egypt, between
1896-1900, a Hebrew text of Sirach from the 12th century. However, I
couldn’t get my hands on a Hebrew Text either. As you know, Sirach is not in
most Jewish Bibles. So I don’t know what Hebrew word they use for 1,000.*
But think of that word 1000. How many times have we heard people say, “I
have thousands and friends”? I find that significant, because people juggle and
toss the word “friend” around an awful lot lately. I’ve heard various people - when discussing
the word “friend” say things like what Sirach says. I hear him saying: we have lots of acquaintances
- but in reality a few friends or confidants.
I like the statement that if we have 5 friends in a lifetime we are
lucky.
I don’t tweet or text - or use some of these social media things - other
than e-mail - but I know the word “befriend” flows freely. I have heard people say
that they have thousands of friends - because they invite all kinds of people
into their chat rooms and Facebooks pages, etc. etc. etc.
So that’s the first message I take from Sirach - the difference between
acquaintances and friends.
SOMETIMES FRIENDS
BECOME ENEMIES
The second issue Sirach tackles is the horrible experience of a friend
who becomes an enemy.
I would add that experience tells us loud and clear the difference
between an acquaintance and a friend. The degree of hurt tells us the quality
of a relationship - whether this other is a friend or an acquaintance.
If it really hurts, then we’re talking more about a friendship - or an
assumed friendship more than an acquaintance.
Sirach describes this person as one who talks about a fight we’ve had
with them or whatever - to our shame.
Jesus knows this one very well - with his friend Judas who betrays him.
Today’s gospel talks about divorce - the horrible experience when 2 people
who hopefully were best friends - had their marriage fell apart - and they
often become enemies. Sirach stuff is good stuff to reflect upon when
reflecting upon one’s marriage.
THIRD - SUNNY DAY
VS. RAINLY DAY FRIENDS
Sirach talks next about shallow friends and friends who are there in
tough times - especially when we need them. When things are going great, great;
when things are going sour, see you later alligator.
In fact, when things are going bad for us, this type of friend turns against us or avoids
us.
Someone said, “False friendship, like ivy, decays
and ruins the walls it embraces; but true friendship gives new life and
animation to the object it supports.”
Ben Sira wrote his stuff around 180 B.C.
It’s not in the Jewish Bible, but it’s in ours. As one reads today’s
first reading, it sounds like stuff that
could be written in our time. It’s stuff that lasts - and that’s probably why
it lasted.
CONCLUSION
The title of my homily is “Friendship.”
I urge you to jot down 3 to 5 life time friends.
They are home to us - a sturdy shelter to rest under as Sirach puts it. They are a treasure - to
cherish.
FOOTNOTE
·
[As an aside - or
a distraction - I want to sneak in mention of a book I read last year: Sacred
Treasure -- The Cairo Genizah by Rabbi Mark Glickman. I found out that a
Genizah is an attic or big room in a synagogue where they sort of “dump” old sacred writings or anything Jewish in
print. The one in Cairo was a gold mine of old Jewish writings. Between 1896
and 1982 - but most early on - they found 4 texts of Sirach in Hebrew from the
10th to the 12th centuries - plus fragments. Scholars say
Sirach was written in Hebrew by Ben Sira. Then his grandson - according to the Translator's Foreword - says he translated it for the Jews in Egypt. I'm assuming that translation was into Greek. I’d also recommend checking out information on Genizahs. There is another
book about them. This one is not called, “Sacred Treasure” but “Sacred Trash”. In the Catholic Church people
often bring a shopping bag containing old prayer books of someone who died. The
practice is to burn them - which Jews are not supposed to do - hence the
Genizah. It’s my experience that Catholics sometimes dump them in a rectory side
room and run.]
