November 11, 2016

HIDING  PLACE 

“You know, you need, a hiding place?”

Someone said that to me - way back.

Then they asked, “Where’s yours?”

“Walking…. Taking a good walk by

myself. That always works.”

“Good. Glad that helps ….”

So I asked back, “Where’s yours?”

“Oh, I have this neat back porch!”

“Or sometimes I use this chair in the cellar.”

“And, sometimes, I love to drop into an

empty afternoon church. Just to hide there

behind a pole - sort of like Jesus slipping

away from the boys and heading for

the mountains or this garden he knew of.”

I answered, “Hey, want to take a walk?”

© Andy Costello, Reflections 2016

November 10, 2016

A CUP OF TEA

A cup of tea in the afternoon or

the early evening demands talk and

at least another - to share the day.

Okay, some prefer wine or a beer

 - to cheer and loosen up the tongue,

so as to make our day make sense.

A cup of tea, a shot, a beer, wine,

whatever - and add chips or bread

and butter - could life be any better?

© Andy Costello, Reflections 2016

November 9, 2016

NUDGE

“Hmm!” - sometimes we hear that

slight sound from someone who

feels like we’ve stuck them in a corner.

“Hmm!” - is a prompt - a hint - a nudge

from another - to notice - to listen - to find

out who another is - and what they want.

“Hmm!” - can be a cue - a clue - from

God to us - a coaxing - a grace - to

notice God is in our corner. “Hmm!”

© Andy Costello, Reflections 2016

November 8, 2016

I VOTED

I’m wearing that sticker

that says, “I voted!” But….

But I want to wear a

sticker that says, “Finally!”

And another that says,

“Please…. Never again!”

And another that says, “Will

things ever be the same again?”

Another that says, “Enough with

the money and the negatives.”

And one last one, “Leave God out

of this - unless you really mean it.”

© Andy Costello, Reflections 2016

CONTROL

INTRODUCTION

The title of my homily for this 32^nd Tuesday in Ordinary Time is, “Control.”

In the English translation of today’s Letter of Paul to Titus, the word “control” is used 4 times. [Cf. Letter if Paul to Titus 2:1-8, 11-14.]

Older men should be self-controlled….

Older women should be training younger women to love their husbands and children to have self-control  - as well as to be under the control of their husbands.

Any reaction to that comment?

And younger men need to be urged to control themselves.

I would add that the word “control” is a button word for many.

And for some - once a button is pushed - things can be out of our control. We’ve seen that in TV sit-coms going back beyond I Love Lucy.

So last night as I read today’s readings to come up with a homily, I asked myself, “What does one say about control - controlling self  - controlling family members - as Paul urges in today’s first reading - and controlling servants as today’s gospel puts it. [Cf. also Luke 17: 7-10.]

5 COMMENTS ABOUT CONTROL - THERE ARE MANY OTHERS

So for the sake of some semblance of thinking about this, here are five personal comments about control. There are many others. It’s out of my control to get it all - and many other nuances about the issue of control.

Control - to say the least - has to be one of the top ten issues in life that we all have to wrestle with.  It shows up in relationships - marriage - government - raising kids - how things flow - and how things go with each other.

First, there are things within our control.

We have the power of choice in lots of things: to floss or not to floss - to empty the dish washer or not to empty the dishwasher? Like standing there on line at McDonald's, we have the choice to pick Meal # 1 or Meal # 3 - that is, if we’re not a kid and an adult is not giving us orders. So sometimes we have the power of choice. Sometimes the ball is in our hands and we can shoot for the basket. If we miss - and miss too many shots, the coach can bench us. But for a moment there, it was all us - our freedom - our move - our shot. We’re in control. We have the ball. We think we’re on the ball. Shoot.

Secondly, there are things that are out of our control.

For example, the weather. For example, others. We’re stuck with the preacher we’re getting  - yakking away in the pulpit - if we come to Mass. We’re stuck with the parents we got. As of right now, we have the neighbor we have next door to us. He  likes to mow his lawn at 10 PM and we put our kid to bed at 9:30 PM. That was in Dear Abby two days ago and she died a few years ago - and she’s still in control of her column.

Thirdly, God is in charge of a lot of things beyond our control.

When we pray the Our Father,  we could change the word “will” to “control” and say the Our Father this way, “Thy control  be done, on earth as it is in heaven.” We could work on letting go of trying to be in control and let God take over.  There are jokes about this. Sometimes we have to let God be God - others be others - and learn to bend and be humble.

Fourthly, we human beings have free will.

When it comes to God, there are things that are out of God’s hands - like free will. God gave us freedom. That’s what is being said very primitively - while at the same time - very clearly - in the Adam and Eve story in the Book of Genesis.  If it wasn’t this way, then love wouldn’t be love - because the beauty of love is that the other doesn’t have to love us - or choose us - but when they do - and we get it - life can become wonderful.

Fifthly: when it comes to control - especially self-control - we humans are really not in control at times.

We all need to realize that when it comes to being in control, often we’re not. We need to discover what everyone needs to learn. Sometimes we’re the problem. We self-destruct.  Self-control can be very slippery and sneaky.

This was one of the great learnings of St. Paul.  I tell myself I am going to do this and I do the opposite. [Cf. Romans 7: 14-24.]

Augustine said the same thing. I tell my right hand to do this and my left hand does the opposite.

In other words, we’ve discovered the reality of being powerless - out of control - in the midst and mix and mystery of life. 

Every person who has gone on a diet - and is grabbing that extra dough nut - knows this. Every person who gets addicted to booze, drugs, cigarettes, porn, chocolate, knows the reality of weakness.

So the most basic prayer is, “Help!” And sometimes, that’s the hardest prayer to make. We need others. We need God. We need groups, therapists, humility.

CONCLUSION

As Paul put It paradoxically, “It’s when I’m weak, I’m strong, It’s then I can enter - receive - get out of my bench - walk down the aisle and enter into communion with Christ - and community. [Cf. 2 Corinthians 12:10.]

GOOD  EXAMPLE, BAD  EXAMPLE, 

WHICH HAS THE GREATER IMPACT?

INTRODUCTION

The title of my homily for this 32 Monday in Ordinary Time is, “Good Example, Bad Example, Which Has The Greater Impact?”

TODAY’S READINGS

Today’s readings challenge us to give good example to each other.

Today’s first reading talks about good qualities for a bishop as well as bad characteristics to avoid. [Cf. Letter of Saint Paul to Titus 1:1-9.]

I’ve never received a form in the mail to fill out about someone being considered for becoming a bishop. For someone for a job or to be fit to adopt a child, yes. Bishop no.

Paul tells Titus what to look for in presbyters for every town - that they be blameless, married only once, and with believing children who have a good track record. For bishops they too should be blameless, not arrogant, not irritable, not a drunkard, not aggressive, not greedy for sordid gain, but hospitable, a lover of goodness, temperate, just, holy and self-controlled, holding fast to the true message as taught so that he will be able to exhort with sound doctrine and to refute opponents.”

Today’s gospel has a very scary comment - that it would be better for someone to have a millstone put around their neck and thrown into the sea than to cause a little one to sin. I was in Israel once and saw a few millstones leaning against buildings.  I got the message. [Cf. Luke 17: 1-6.]

That’s one bible text that everyone should hear - especially popes and bishops and priests. I’ve heard it these past 30 years many, many times in looking at the sexual abuse problems in the Catholic Church.

Unfortunately, I sense that lawsuits - and money - had the bigger impact - than the warning words of Jesus - but especially the care of children.

EXAMPLE

The title of my homily is, “Good Example, Bad Example, Which Has The Greater Impact?”

If you were sent a survey, how would you answer that question. If the survey said: “Give examples.” What would you give as your answer?

Whenever I see a baby with a great smile, I always give credit for starters to the baby’s parents. Smiles beget smiles. Smiles carve smiles in another’s face.

Should I also add, scowls?  However, I prefer to think good example has the greater impact.

Which has the greatest impact from the pulpit? Negative or positive comments?

I remember hearing a talk by Ralph Greenson, a psychoanalyst. He said, “If someone says, 'Jack Jones is a great guy,' nobody hardly notices that, but if they  say, ' Jack Jones is a son of a ____' everyone joins in to prove it.”

Someone said, “A good example  is worth a thousand sermons.”

Every preacher has heard at least a thousand times the silent scream from the church benches, “Practice what you preach!”

CONCLUSION

We are living proofs of the power of example.

We do a lot of what we do - because of what we saw - and what was done to us.

And we are repeat performances of our parents and their parents and their parents.

A closing for example, example, about the past showing up in our present.

A marine sergeant sweetly addressed his marines at the end of an exhaustive period of drill, “When I was a little child, I had a set of wooden soldiers.  There was a poor boy in our neighborhood. Well, after I had  been to church and heard a great sermon about being generous, I was soft enough to give my wooden soldiers to him. Then I wanted them back and I cried. My mother said, ‘Don’t cry Johnny; some day you’ll get your wooded soldiers back.’  And believe me, you lop-sided, mutton-headed, wooden- brained set of certified rolling pins, that day has come.”

November 7, 2016

HURT

What hurts?

Your face - your front page -

has the headline, "I'm hurting! I'm in pain….”

What hurts?

A wrong word - arthritis - an empty chair -

an empty bed - a disappointment - a gone?

What heals?

A listening - time - another - Oh my God! - 

a willingness to - to try - to heal - to be again….

© Andy Costello, Reflections 2016