REMEMBER  LOT’S  WIFE! 

INTRODUCTION

The title of my homily for this 32^nd Friday of Ordinary Time is, “Remember Lot’s Wife!”

This is a message for us from Jesus this morning in today’s gospel. [Cf. Luke 17: 26-37 - especially verse 32]

“Remember Lot’s Wife!”

Could you all repeat that after me: “Remember Lot’s Wife.”

Everybody in Jesus’ audience - who was Jewish - would get what that was all about.

It’s part of an old legend from the Book of Genesis 19:26 - stories about Lot - the nephew of Abraham. It was all part of Jewish culture.

The legend is that God destroyed some towns - but warned Lot and his family - to get out of town - before it happened. They did - but they were told to run and don’t look back.

Well, Lot’s wife looked back - and froze - at seeing the burning horror that  was happening back there - worse - she became a pillar of rock salt.

People freeze. People panic. People get stuck!

Haven’t we all seen what looked like people in trees and objects - in this and that - in the distance or semi-darkness? Well someone must have seen these stone pillars sculpted by the wind - down there near the Dead Sea - and came up with this legend that what they were looking at was once a person.

It’s the stuff of legend - and like lots of legends - there is a truth in it. That’s one of the purposes of telling stories and legends.

AND A MESSAGE IS: DON’T GET STUCK IN THE PAST

Don’t get stuck in a hurt. Don’t get stuck in a mistake.

We get hurt, but we better not identify ourselves as a hurt. We make mistakes, but we are not a mistake. There are disasters, but we are not a disaster.

Everyone has mistakes in their memory. We’ve memorized them - but they don’t have to mesmerize us for life.

We have a past. We have a memory. We know the stuff of our life - but along with the blessing of a memory - comes the memory of the mistakes of our past. Don’t get stuck in them.

People do.

People walk away from or want to walk away from the person who keeps on telling the story of a mistake or a hurt or a disaster they made for the 100^th time.

I still remember being in grammar or elementary school and I was on a PAL - Police Athletic League - baseball team: the Bay Ridge Robins. Walter Eckardt was the manager - and his little brother was on our team. Mr. Eckardt put his little brother in to play first base - my position - for every game of the season but one out. That’s all I got to play: one out - for a whole season. Bummer. Evidently I still remember it.

I remember being in the second year of high school and I had the lead in a play: East Come, Easy Go. I had to memorize over 500 lines. I got it done. Couldn’t do it now. Well, it was 4 pages to the end of Act One. Surprise! This other guy forgot his line. Silence. Silence.

Silence feels very long and very slow - when one is on stage.

Silence. So since I had the lead, I grabbed a line I had. The show must go on. And it went on perfectly to the end of Act One. Just after I got the play going again I could see the director in the wings - out of view of the audience - shaking his head and his arms - saying, “Oh no! Oh no! Oh no!”

Act One ended. The curtain closed. The audience clapped. I went right to the director and said, “What’s wrong?”

“What’s wrong? You cut 4 people out of the play.” 

Then he added that their names are on the program and their parents are in the audience.

I have remembered that moment my whole life.

I always want to make sure I don’t cut people out of the play of life.

YOU KNOW THE FEELING

You know the feeling. You know what it’s like to slip or sin or fail. You know your miscues and mistakes. We know when we cut another up or out.

You are reading in public and you make a major mispronunciation or you’re driving and you get a ticket or you bump another car - or get cut from a team or you don’t make the team or the group or you get dumped by someone.

All bummers.

Some people get stuck in their mistakes.

Some people get stuck in a comment made by a parent or they get stuck in their parent’s divorce or disaster or put down.

For life.

Remember Lot’s wife.

Remember Harry Angstum in Rabbit Run - the 1960 novel by John Updike. Harry is stuck in his past - and keeps running away from his mistakes and his disasters. Rabbit, Run!

A car has that big windshield that helps us see where we are headed. It also has a small rear view mirror to show us what’s behind us.

We have the choice to concentrate on what’s ahead or what’s behind us.

We can look at mistakes and missed opportunities or we can look to make the next moment the right moment.

The field goal kicker can see the ones that went through the goal posts or the ones he missed.  He can practice, practice, practice for the next opportunity.

MOVIES AND PLAYS

Movies and plays play on this theme of the past and the future.

The Death of a Salesman by Arthur Miller….  On the Waterfront by Budd Schulberg…. The Greek Tragedies …. Shakespeare’s tragedies …. They all touch on getting stuck in the past - in the tragedies of our life - and the hope and the desire for a solution.

Rick [Humphrey Bogart] - and Ilsa  [Ingrid Bergman] in Casablanca always had Paris - but they had to make a major decision on the tarmac of the Casablanca airport.

The movie I like the best in all this was Shawshank Redemption when Andy Dufresne had it in his mind - all through his time in prison - to escape and to be free. He told Red: “Get busy living, or get busy dying.” Andy got busy living.

Remember Lot’s Wife! She was busy dying - looking backwards.

Andy Dufresne was busy planning a life after he escaped from prison. He finally escapes - crawling through 500 yards of crap. “That's the length of five football fields, just shy of half a mile.” He did it. He made it. He set himself free - to move into a future - escaping his past in Maine and getting to Mexico!

Red [Morgan Freeman] says in Shawshank Redemption, “Let me tell you something my friend. Hope is a dangerous thing. Hope can drive a man insane.”

Hope is a virtue - a power - to have for the future. It can be dangerous - because it’s a not yet - and maybe that’s one more reason why folks get stuck in the past. They know the known; they don’t know the unknown.

CONCLUSION

The title of my homily is, “Remember Lot’s Wife.”

The implication is to use the past - something that happened - to energize for the future.

It worked with mantras and slogans like, “Remember the Alamo” or “Remember Pearl Harbor” or "Do this in memory of me!"

Jesus is warning us with his words, “Remember Lot’s Wife” - to be prepared for the future - to get caught up in resurrection not destruction. Amen.

NOTES:

Painting on top: Lot's Wife by Edward Wheeler


Picture: "Mount Sodom, a hill along the southwestern part of the Dead Sea in Israel, is made almost entirely of halite (rock salt). It is about 5 miles long, 3 miles wide, 742 feet above the Dead Sea water level, and yet 557 feet below sea level. Weathering separated sometimes portions of rock formations. One such separate pillar is known as ‘Lot's Wife’, because the pillar resembles a woman wearing a cloak, with reference to the destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah, as mentioned in the Bible." -- From on-line.

OPTIMISTS RULE

Quote for Today - Friday - November 15, 2013

"I prefer to remember the happy things over 10 years, the things that went well.  Let me see, what did go well?"

Rudolf Bing: A comment after a decade as manager of the Metropolitan Opera, New York Herald Tribune, October 9, 1960

Task:

Jot down 10 happy things from your past 10 years - or if you're as old as me - 10 things that happened each decade of the rosary of your life.

IS EXPERIENCE 

THE BEST TEACHER?

Quote for Today - Thursday - November 14, 2013

"Most of the most important experiences that truly educate cannot be arranged ahead of time with any precision."

Harold Taylor, President Sarah Lawrence College, "The Private World of the Man with a Book," Saturday Review, January 7, 1961


Questions:

List the 5 most important experiences of your life?

List the 5 experiences in your life that you learned the most from?

Be specific!

LOVE AND MEMORY

Quote for Today - Wednesday - November 13, 2013

"Love and memory last and will so endure till the game is called because of darkness."

Gene Fowler, Skyline, Viking, 1961

LET'S TALK 

Quote for Today - Tuesday - November 12, 2013

“A gossip is one who talks to you about others; a bore is one who talks to you about himself; and a brilliant conversationalist is one who talks to you about yourself.”  

Lisa Kirk, New York Journal American, March 9, 1954

REGRETS

Quote for Today - Monday November 11, 2013

“Regrets are as personal as fingerprints.”  

Margaret Culkin Banning, “Living With Regrets,”  Readers Digest, October 1958

IS THAT ALL THERE IS? 

TWO WOMEN WHO

HOVER IN MY MEMORY

INTRODUCTION

The title of my homily for this 32^nd Sunday in Ordinary Time, C, “Is That All There Is?  Two Women Who Hover In My Memory.”

Today’s three readings, Machabees, Thessalonians, and Luke, Old Testament and New Testament, challenge us to look at life and death, faith and meaning, resurrection or nothingness.  Big topics!

Is this life all there is?

How many of us - at a funeral - or a sleepless night - or - when we’re about to have a major operation think: “What happens if I die and there is nothing after this?”

Then we laugh - or smirk inwardly: “Well if this is all there is, we’ll never know till after we die and then we’ll never know.”

Uh oh! That triggers one more, “Uh oh!”

Doubts! We’re allowed to have them.

Doubts! In fact as wisdom figures often point out: if you don’t have them, you’re not thinking.

Doubts! So they are real. They’re under different rocks along the way - especially tomb stones.

And I would expect as we move towards the end of the year, we should expect end of life questions. 

We who live in the Northern Hemisphere, if we’re in a four season locale, are reminded of these topics and themes by nature as well. The trees along the roads and on our streets - announce with each parachuting leaf: time is almost up. Neighbors who are neat are out there with their rakes and black plastic bags. They are telling us: winter is coming. For some reason cemeteries in November seem louder than usual. And sometimes we wonder if the obituary column is longer around this time of the year than at other times.

TWO WOMEN

As priest - these questions pop up - perhaps - more in my mind - than for other folks. The request to do a funeral - or to visit someone who is dying - are part of a parish priest’s week. Before I came to Annapolis to do parish priest work, I did quite a bit of parish missions. Part of that work was to visit the sick of a parish - especially those who were homebound or in nursing homes.

Two women still hover - keep lingering -  in my memories - whenever I begin thinking about these end of life issues - as well as when I drive down November or December highways as we head towards the end of another year - church and calendar years.

I met these two women in different states. For the sake of privacy I’ll keep the first name of both these women anonymous.

The first woman lived in a farm house. A parishioner, a man who brought me to see this lady, told me as we were getting out of the car that the lady had about 2 months to live. We had asked the pastor to line up people in the parish who know who the shut-ins were. The driver visited this couple once a week and brought them communion.

Hearing him say, “two months to live” triggered an “Uh oh!” in me.

The man knocked on the door. He then opened it and walked right in. This told me that  he had been here many times. The woman was sitting right there on a couch. She was yellow. She was filled with cancer. It was eating into her liver.

The woman told us that her husband was in the bedroom - not feeling that well. He told her, “Relax! I’ll check him out.”

He then walked towards the back of the house to see her husband.  The idea was to give her some time to chat and pray and be alone with me. We sat and talked. We sat and I listened.

With a bit of nervousness - after she told me she didn’t have much time left, I asked her, “Are you ready?”

She looked at me - as if surprised a priest would ask her such a question.

Then she said directly and calmly. “Ready?  In less than a month I’m going to see the shining face of Jesus.”

Then she told me that Jesus has been the one who had been with her all these days - loving her husband - raising the kids - dealing with cancer. “Jesus has been with me all the days of my life.”

I breathed a sigh of relief.

When we were finished  I went to the back and asked her husband if he was well enough to have communion with his wife - in the living room.

Then we went back to the front of the house and the four of us joined hands in prayer. Then I broke the communion host in half - and gave one half to her and the other half to her husband. That’s something I like to do when I give communion to couples in a situation like this.

As we headed back to the car - I said to the guy doing the driving, “Wow. What a neat couple. What serenity. What faith. What hope. What trust.”

I’ll have never forgotten her face. It was shining!

The second woman whom I have never forgotten was in a nursing home - in another state. The two priests in the parish asked me to see her. For some reason, I sensed problems here. But they said nothing.

I went by myself.  It was quite a distance to the nursing home. They gave good directions. She was the only Catholic in the nursing home.

She was in her room.  Her only question was, “Am I going to hell, Father?” She asked that question at least 7 times in the first 7 minutes. A nurse’s aid in the corridor heard the question and I could see her face wince.

I stayed for about 20 minutes. She didn’t hear me when I said, “Jesus loves you. Jesus forgives you everything.” I didn’t know what else to say, so I said words like that. They didn’t take. She kept with her, “Am I going to hell, Father?” 

I realized she had memory loss and was frozen in that one question: “Am I going to hell?”

As I drove back I felt lonely. Helpless! I felt angst and yuck.

That evening at supper, both priests asked me about my day and the different nursing homes I visited. And then came  the real question, “Did you see so and so? Were you able to deal with her, ‘Am I going to hell?’ question.”

At that I felt they had the same feelings of disappointment.

They told me that she has been asking that same question of every priest that goes to see her for over 7 years now.

We talked a bit more about all this. I have no idea what we ate - only what was eating us - our wonderings if  church or preachers - or family - who or what - got her into this frozen lake of worry. We wondered if we or anyone could have helped her back then sometime - before she got into this state.

By now she’s surely dead - and I’m assuming she’s laughing with God.

Yet,   to be totally honest, let me say this: “Of course, I don’t know - really down deep - I don’t know how all this works. I know the words and the teachings and the scripture stories.”

She’s still alive for me - in that small nursing home - somewhere there in the back of my mind.

And the obvious question: will this happen to me?

And the obvious question: have I done this to anyone?

And the obvious prayer: “Lord, make me an announcer of your copious redemption.” That’s the motto and the charism of the community I belong to - the Redemptorist Congregation in the Church.

Yes - that’s our motto - and I wince every time someone says, “Redemptorists? Aren’t they the ones who used to preach fire and brimstone sermons?” 

And I respond: “I hope not. Our motto is, ‘Copiosa apud eum redemptio.’ ‘With him there is fullness of  redemption.’”

So I hope I can preach that message to those who still have their minds - and I pray for those in nursing homes or at home who are in the November or December of their lives that they have  serenity of Spirit - trusting in the Lord walking with them if they begin to feel they are going through a dark valley.

GOSPEL

Ooops. Well, I better get to a conclusion - after talking about conclusions - in this homily.

The title of my homily is: “Is That All There Is?  Two Women Who Hover In My Memory.”

Today’s gospel can get us in touch with the reality that some people think about these questions.

Some people think there is nothing after this life.

Some do.

Some people get nervous about second marriages - and what happens if there is life after this? Will my first spouse be waiting for me and say, “I thought ….?”

Today’s gospel tells us about the Sadducees - who use an old anecdote about a woman  who was married to seven brothers. She buries them all off - so the question arises:  “Who will be her husband if there is life after death?”

It’s their way of challenging Jesus and anyone who believes in resurrection after death. 

Jesus tries to stretch their minds and their hopes by telling those who will listen that they have no clue to what the next life is all about. The next age will not be about marriage and re-marriage - but about being celebrating eternal life with God and with all who have gone before us - Moses, Abraham, Isaac, Jacob. 

CONCLUSION

The title of my homily is: “Is That All There Is?  Two Women Who Hover In My Memory.”

Right now I’m thinking of my sister Peggy who has just died. I have faith that her life includes resurrection and eternal life. Being a religious, I believe in Jesus’ promises about those who chose the kind of life a religious nun or priest chooses has eternal value.

Having read today’s readings - I also suspect that triggered Peggy Lee’s 1969 signature song: “Is That All There Is?”

The song’s message compared to Jesus’ words about all that is to come - seems empty and insipid. Peggy Lee’s refrain is, “If that’s all there is, my friend, then let’s keep dancing, let’s break out the booze, and have a ball.”

Peggy Lee near the end of her song says that if that’s all there is, it will be disappointing. I was disappointed with the end of the song - because I think Christianity - with the promises of Christ - urges us to live life to the full - both now and for all eternity.

Interesting - in Greek theology - eternity is described as the perichoresis - from the two Greek words - “peri” - “around” and “chorea” meaning dance - so heaven is the Great Dance or the Divine Dance - in which all are invited into this great dance with the Trinity. I picture my sister Peggy and all those who have gone before me - in that dance - and so as Peggy Lee says, “let’s keep dancing” because this here life is not all that there is. Amen.

OOOOOOOOOO

Painting on top: Mary Cassatt, Young Woman in Green Outdoors in the Sun, 1914