SIBLING RIVALRY

INTRODUCTION

The title of my homily for this 18th Tuesday in Ordinary Time is, “Sibling Rivalry.”

TODAY’S FIRST READING

When I read today’s first reading from Numbers 12: 1-13, I scratched my head and said, “Now what is this all about?” Next I thought: “No wonder we ignore the first reading for homily consideration at times - because this is too complicated. It’s too early in the morning. Will anyone get anything out of this first reading?”

I read the first reading again. Then I read what the commentaries say about the text. I smiled when I read that a few of them say it’s complicated. It has various threads of thought and experiences that come from various times and sources of Israel’s history. What I found most intriguing was the comment and the text is being used in struggles between two types of prophets in Israel in the 8th century BC - using a story that came down from word of mouth from earlier - from a story from the time of the Exodus - which some date in the 1400’s. [1] So because it’s a mishmash part of the stories about Moses and others, no wonder it’s a head scratcher.

Then a new thought hit me. That's what I am usually hoping for when reading the readings of the day and trying to come up with a short thought for a homily.

The new thought: people at times ask about how to read the Bible. New thought: why not suggest going through the Bible using the issue of Sibling Rivalry?

Someone could go through the Bible - cover to cover - and jot down any and every sibling rivalry story that comes up. Put down character’s names and then the text numbers like: Cain and Abel Genesis 1-16; Abram and Lot Genesis 13: 1-18; Ishmael and Hagar, Genesis 16: 1-16; and on and on and on.

It could be done. And here in Numbers 12: 13 we a sibling rivalry between a brother and a sister with their brother Moses.

SIBLINGS

When I was growing up, if someone asked me how many siblings I had, I would wondering if they were asking about a type of gold fish or a yo yo or what have you. I never heard the word, “Sibling” - so when I began to hear the word, I wasn’t sure just what it meant. Now it’s as common as words like “texting” or “twittering”.

THE RESULTS

By going through the whole Bible and jotting down various sibling rivalries - like the Prodigal Son and his older brother, James and John, and a whole list from the Old Testament - like Joseph and his brothers, we could do some heavy thinking about all this.

One thought would be the question of whether the world is hurting itself by less and less kids in families. What will China be like by only wanting boys and limitings? What will Europe be like by not repopulating itself and then comes the influx of folks from other parts of the world - who are having lots of kids? Kids are expensive. Kids are the stories of life.

The Catholic Church has always stressed the importance of children as the key to marriage and life.

How about listening to therapists and grandmothers and grandfathers and people from big families and people from small families? What’s their take and what’s their experience of where they come from?

Is it important for people to experience family - and their place in a family? Is it important for people to wonder about what it meant to be the oldest of 5 or the youngest of 6 or the middle child of 3 or the only boy of 7 or the only girl of 4 or to have experienced the death of a brother or a sister at an early age - or to get hand me downs - or be in packed bedrooms - or to think mom or dad likes so and so more than me or him or her. Is it important to deal with contrasts and comparisons? What it like to be the Black Sheep of the family - or to have teachers compare us to an older brother or sister - or to be an only child and one visits cousins in abundance from bigger families. What’s it like for an oldest in one family marry the youngest in another family? I’ve heard there are optimum situtations. What about step-children and adopted children - in the family mix?

It’s the stuff of story and it’s the stuff of Bible.

CONCLUSION

So today’s first reading begins with something that happens in various families. It begins this way: “Miriam and Aaron spoke against Moses on the pretext of the marriage he had contracted with a Cushite woman.”

Were they unhappy with their sister-in-law? Were they unhappy with their brother’s choice of a wife? Or was it something else? Jealousy? Comparison? What have you? Then Miriam gets leprosy - a skin disease and turns white. What is that all about? And God is described as angry with Miriam. Does God make us itch and scratch our heads and body when rivalry and messy family stuff is going on?

Scratch the surface of all this. Family stuff is Bible stuff. Family stuff is our stuff. Family stuff is learning stuff.

NOTES

[1] Cf. God Day By Day, Following the Weekday Lectionary, Vol. two, Ordinary Time: Matthew, Marcel Bastin, Ghislain Pinchers, Michel Teheux, page 183; The New Jerome Biblical Commentary, "Numbers", p.85, #28, by Conrad E. L’Heureux.

IT  HURTS

Quote For Today - August 2,  2011

"The least pain in our little finger gives us more concern and uneasiness, than the destruction of millions of our fellow-beings."

William Hazlitt [1778-1830], in Works, Volume X, page 324.

Photograph by Ruth Framson of the New York Times, November 2008, showing a girl in Shivpuri, India, suffering from malnutrition which stunts growth.

ON HEARING CONFESSIONS

Quote for Today - Feast of St. Alphonsus - August 1, 2011

"Be a lion in the pulpit, but a lamb in the confessional."


Saying of St. Alphonsus de Liguori [1696-1787]

FINDING JESUS

IN A DESERTED PLACE

INTRODUCTION

The title of my homily for this 18 Sunday in Ordinary Time, Year A, is, “Finding Jesus In A Deserted Place.”

Looking at your life have you ever been deserted - dropped - rejected from a relationship or a marriage that didn’t make it? Or you’re out of work or you’re out of meaning or out of sorts? Have you ever felt like you’re left all alone? You feel like burnt toast - a single slice of hard toast, no longer hot - you’re cold, dumped - tossed into a boneless garbage bag in a plastic garbage can - along with soggy spinach tossed on top of you - it too rejected after hiding in the back of the refrigerator for a week, and you’re just there - slowly becoming more and more soggy because you’re soaked in spinach juice - there along with egg shells, coffee grinds and a used t-bag or two?

Did you notice if Jesus was there in that same place - along with you and others?

Today’s gospel begins, “When Jesus heard of the death of John the Baptist, he withdrew in a boat to a deserted place by himself.”

We can picture that. Jesus, who was connected to John the Baptist, hears that John was killed, beheaded. Tough stuff. Wouldn’t we all become silent - like when we hear on the evening news about someone who was kidnapped and then found dead, beheaded, left behind some building next to or in a dumpster? Uggh! Tough stuff.

The gist or movement or argument of my homily is the following question: “Do we find ourselves reaching out for Jesus - looking for Jesus - finding Jesus - discovering Jesus more - when we are feeling deserted - when things are not right - than when we feel all is going well, all is flourishing - all is right?”

Do we pray more when in a storm than in calm cool weather?

Do we knock on God’s door more when someone is dying - or when we get a cancer scare - than in the middle of a golf game and we’re doing well - or we’re at Ocean City on vacation and the weather is perfect?

EMPTINESS AND FULLNESS

As I read today’s three readings as well as today’s Psalm 145 - I hear the themes of emptiness and fullness. We know both feelings - but I dare say - we know the feeling of emptiness more than the feeling of fullness. And paradoxically, sometimes when we feel filled, bloated, full of the wrong stuff, we can feel empty. Life is tricky. Life is intricate.

Here at St. Mary’s  Parish we have a lot of funerals. As priest I know the feeling of doing a funeral on a Saturday morning and then switching gears and doing a wedding on a Saturday afternoon. Sometimes, it’s hard to switch gears.

So there is a difference between at a wedding and at a funeral. There’s a difference between a honeymoon and a divorce. There’s a difference between winning and losing. There’s a difference between being cold watermelon on a hot day than being tossed toast or being that week old spinach in the back of a cold refrigerator and then tossed into the garbage on top of toast that was burnt and rejected.

And sometimes we all feel the need to escape, to run, to take a good walk - alone - to get in a boat, take a vacation, and get away from it all - to sort it all out - but sometimes we can’t catch a break.

When do we feel empty? When do we feel full? Do we ever spot Jesus in those places - in those moments?

If I heard 3 people say it lately, I’ve heard a dozen people say it: sometimes the evening news is too wrong - especially when it shows the wrangling and the theater and the push and pull and politics - this time using the debt. Then the play of that news is followed by a story about a bombing in Iraq or Afghanistan or Norway or wherever. Then there’s a story about fires or drought in the south or southwest and the hope for rain and on and on and on. Then they play a feel good story at the end of the evening news - maybe out of guilt - or maybe people on the staff feel a need for more balance.

How do newscasters switch gears? How do they stop from being robotic? How do they tell a story with integrity and authenticity night after night after night? I like to hear that some TV anchor is on vacation - because we all need “time-out’s” - escapes - from the everyday - especially when it’s hot and humid or it’s too much.

Is that what Jesus was doing when he escaped in a boat to a deserted place?

TODAY’S READINGS

Like a newscaster let me make a review of today’s readings.

Today’s first reading from Isaiah 55 is a classic text. We know the words. We’ve heard it sung: “Come to the water!” “All you who are thirsty, come to the water! You who have no money, come, receive grain and eat; Come without paying and without cost, drink wine and milk! Why spend your money for what is not bread; your wages for what fails to satisfy.”

Powerful words about basic human feelings of being thirsty and being hungry, wasting our money and our lives on what does not satisfy. We know the feeling. We’ve been there. Do you spot Jesus there?

Psalm 145’s response - which we sang 4 times - has the message “The hand of the Lord feeds us; he answers all our needs.”

Today’s second reading from  Romans  proclaims fullness and emptiness in a very powerful way as well: “Who can separate us from the love of Christ?” Christ is fullness. Then Paul mentions empty feelings: anguish, persecution, famine, nakedness, peril, the sword. Then Paul mentions fullness as well as emptiness again: “For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor present things, nor future things, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

Tag that. I’m going to get back to that at the end of this homily.

And then in the gospel for today we hear about food - 5000 plus people wanting food - food glorious food.

There are a lot of takes on today’s gospel. To me it’s a Eucharistic Text from the Early Church. We find it in all 4 gospels. (1)

I think of this gospel scene at the moment of the Mass when giving out communion. This gospel story gives us the beginnings of the never empty basket, the never empty ciborium, the never empty tabernacle, the never empty hands of Christ giving bread to our world.

I love giving out communion - the Bread of Life. I love it when a parent comes down the aisle at Mass with a little kid - who hasn’t made his or her first communion yet - and the kid reaches out for the Bread of Life. When I see the kid doing what the parent did - putting their hand out to receive, I pray: “Keep reaching kid, keep hungering kid, keep wanting kid.”

Christ tells his disciples to keep on handing out the bread - today - tomorrow - and forever.

The dish - the cup - the basket never runs out of the bread.

Come to the banquet!

DESIRE - FIRE - HUNGERS - THIRSTS - OUTSIDE AND IN

Being a priest I have thought an awful lot about the Mass - especially the Mass as a banquet - the Mass as a meal - when thousands and thousands and thousands of people come week after week to be fed with Jesus the Bread of Life.

Being a human being I have also thought about food - the place of food in our lives.

The four gospels feature food as central to life - obviously.

The four gospels feature Jesus talking about food, feeding people, eating with people - being in communion with people.

When we find ourselves in deserted places - or on a bottom shelf in the back of a refrigerator - we sometimes ask ourselves, “What am I after? What am I searching for? What are my hungers and thirsts? What are my needs? What are my desires? What are my fires? What am I buying?”

Do we find Jesus sitting there in the deserted places where we find these questions often arising in?

For starters we know we need food and drink, bread and wine and fish.

Everybody does.

TV news reminds us of places around the world where people are reaching out for food and drink - especially the starving.

We see children down to bare bones reaching out for bread and water - anything.

Food glorious food. There is enough for everyone - if we can get our act together - if we can change our priorities - especially if we put into practice the cry of the prophets: "to hammer swords into ploughshears, spears into sickles - nations not lifting sword against nations - nor train for war no more." This might be thought to be poetry - but I'll take Isaiah, Joel  and Micah as my prophets and profits. (2)

THE DESIRE FOR MORE

We always want more.

On these hot days the cold water font or the bottled water section of the store screams, “Come to the water!”

I love it when people coming up or down Duke of Gloucester Street stop in here for the water cooler down the corridor - so I can’t wait till this reconstruction is finished - so that scene will be playing again.

Come to the water.

There’s a message here!

Jesus hung out at wells. (3)

Jesus said he was the living water.(4)

Jesus said he was living bread. (5)

Jesus took bread and wine and said, “This is my body. This is my blood. Eat me. Receive me. And if you do eat me up, you’ll have everlasting life. (6)

As Christians we believe that Christ challenges us to look at what we are thirsting and hungering for in life. We're hungering for meaning - for what makes sense - for good news - for stories of people serving people - doing their job as parents - as engineers - as sales people - as computer experts - as public servants - as teachers - as doctors. I love the story that Martin Luther King was down in Memphis, Tennessee in support of garbage collectors when he was assassinated. Horrible, but he was there for others.

Next there are all those inner hungers and thirsts that every human being has.

As Christians we believe Christ taught us everyone is hungering and starving for love, for recognition, for appreciation, for acceptance, to be listened to.

As Christians we believe that we all need these signs of love and acceptance - and we in turn can do these things to one another - love spelled out.

Each of us has our five loaves and two fishes of love inside our cloaks and Jesus is calling us to give these gifts of love: recognition, appreciation, acceptance, affirmation, being listened to, taking time to be with, sharing food with - every day - and the miracle is these 7 gifts will never run out - if we love one another.

This week look people in the eye - people whom we are with all week - look deep into their eyes. Recognize them. Wonder what makes them tick. What are they hungering and thirsting for from me?

This week listen to people with our ears - people we’re with all the time. Listen to them deep into their ears. Hear what they are saying and not saying. What are they hungering and thirsting for from me?

CONCLUSION

Today is the feast of St. Ignatius of Loyola who founded the Jesuits - whose great principle for how to discern in life is: if what you're doing is giving life, more; if what we’re doing is killing self and others, less.

Tomorrow is the feast of St. Alphonsus de Liguori who founded the Redemptorists - the priests in this parish. His great principle for a spiritual life was practicing the love of Jesus Christ. Be careful. There are things that can separate us from the love of Jesus Christ. So practice loving Christ. Practice loving how Jesus Christ loved. Wash feet. Give glasses of cool water. Eye ball people. Listen to people. Be with people in their broken places - in their painfilled places. That’s where Jesus hangs out and waits. Feed them. Be present to them. Be Jesus for them in those deserted places. Amen.

Notes:

(1) Matthew 14: 13-21 today's text - as well as Mark 6: 31-44; Luke 9:10-17; John 6: 1-15.

(2) Isaiah 2:4; Joel 4: 9-11; Micah 4: 3.

(3)  John 4: 5-42

(4) John 7:37-38

(5) John 6: 32-66

(6) Luke 22: 14-20; Matthew 26: 26-28; Mark 14: 22-24; 1 Corinthians 11: 23-25.

REGRETS

Quote for Today - July 31,  2011

"Regrets are as personal as fingerprints."

Margaret Culkin Banning, "Living With Regrets," Reader's Digest, October 1958

P.S. Check out the truth of the above theory. Share your 3 top regrets with someone you trust one to one - and see where that takes your conversation with that person.

A GOOD LIFE

Quote for Today - July 30, 2011

"You define a good flight by negatives: you didn't get hijacked, you didn't crash, you didn't throw up, you weren't late, you weren't nauseated by the food. So you are grateful."

Paul Theroux, The Old Patagonian Express, Houghton Mifflin, 1979

P.S. Having read that, a question: "Now - how would you describe your life again?"

ICE  CREAM 

Quote for Today - July 29, 2011

"My tongue is smiling."

Abigail Trillin, aged 4 - on finishing a dish of chocolate ice cream, quoted by her father, Calvin Trillin, in Alice, Let's Eat, Random House 1978