APARTMENTS  OF  RELIGION

Quote for Today - June 20, 2011

"The inner spaces that a good story lets us enter are the old apartments of religion."

John Updike in the introduction to The Best American Short Stories 1984, Houghton Mifflin 84, quoted by Anatole Broyard, New York Times, November 11, 1984

ARTHRITIC HANDS

He stood there at his dad’s hospital bed –
rubbing his dad’s shoulder – knowing
there was only so much time left in his old body.

His dad must have been down to 144 pounds by now.

He knew death was in hospital room 307 – along with
family and tears and wonderings about, “What’s next?”

With his left hand still on his dad’s bony shoulder,
he reached for his father’s right hand with his right hand.

He held it. He moved it. He lifted it. He wanted his
dad to give him some sign or signal with a grab
or a grasp telling all he knew they were here.

There was no response – but he didn’t give up.

He then slid his left hand down to his dad’s left hand.

His two hands were now holding his dad’s two hands.

He was gentle because the arthritis had made
both hands so bumpy and boney.

Holding his daddy’s hands, he remembered
his first bicycle days. These two hands had lifted
him onto his 2 wheel bike and walked him around
the block 100 times – till he got the trick of it.
His dad was his training wheels. This saved money.

His dad’s hands had fed him and led him
and showed him how to throw a football
and how to hold a hold a fishing rod.

There still was no sign. No signal.

His dad was unconscious the whole time.

His sister said, “Let’s pray!” –
and they all began the Our Father –
all holding hands that were connected
to their dad's hands and at the “Amen”
he suddenly twitched and voiced  an “Amen.”
and died surrounded by love
and hands and family. Amen.

© Andy Costello, Reflections, 2011

A TRINITY OF RELATIONSHIPS

INTRODUCTION

The title of my homily is, “A Trinity of Relationships!”

Today is the Feast of the Holy Trinity as well as Father’s Day.

What to preach on?

The word, “relationships” popped up loud and clear: “relationships.”

FATHERHOOD

Obviously, fatherhood is a relationship. No child, you’re not a father. But you can’t be a father without a mother – no kidding – so a child is part of a trinity of relationships. There’s a message here somewhere.

I am aware of step-fathers, adoptions, and those who use their fathering tasks and skills – but all those particulars are also about relationships.

And I always liked Groucho Marx’s line – which I like to use from time to time in the pulpit – to see if people in church are awake: “If your parents didn’t have any kids, chances are you won’t either.”
I like weddings – because it’s father, mother, son or daughter – in focus – big time. The mother walks down the aisle and lights the unity candle – a symbol of the light from this family is being passed down to a new generation – which will be connected to another family. The father walks the daughter down the aisle and presents his daughter to his future son-in-law. At the wedding son dances with mom – daughter dances with dad. And all watch a trinity of relationships. There is a message here somewhere.

DENVER IN SEPTEMBER

I’m in Denver a few years back for a wedding. It’s Friday morning and I went to the church – and outside the church – in big time – down town Denver – there are what looks like 250 men on line. I go inside the rectory to let them know I’m here for a wedding and I ask about the men. Answer: “Oh they are the men we feed every day.”

I go back outside and walk around. It’s September and I wonder where these men will go in November and December. I wonder deeper. Who are these men? Most seemed to be from 25 to 45. How many are fathers? Did they run away because things got too tough or what have you? What do they think about at night? What do they think about on Father’s Day? What do their kids wonder and worry about at night – at graduations – or on Father’s Day?

As I walked around Denver and seeing lots of these guys, I began wondering about Westerns. Were the cowboys and the outlaws – we saw in all those movies growing up – just like these men – who escaped their fatherhood, their responsibility, their wives, their children, their families, and went west?

I didn’t know the demographics. I didn’t know the facts; but that’s what I mainly thought about as I walked around in downtown Denver – that September.

CANCER

I remember having a wedding here in Annapolis. The father of the bride told me at the rehearsal on Friday evening – just talking in the back before the practice. “5 years ago I got cancer – and I said to myself, ‘I’m going to walk my daughter down the aisle if it kills me’” And then he added, “Smile!” He continued, “Tomorrow, thank God, I’m alive to walk her down the aisle.” Then he added another neat comment. “I walked her down the aisle for her baptism and I said to God that day, ‘I’ll also walk her down the aisle for her wedding.’”

There’s a message in there somewhere.

700 PEOPLE

There were about 700 people here for a funeral on Friday morning – Grahame Rice. He died last Sunday swimming in the Bay for a charity event. He leaves behind a wife and two kids and a lot of friends and a lot of relationships. He prayed with us here in this church at Sunday Mass just like us this morning.

I began by saying, “I don’t want to be here – and none of you want to be here – but here we are – to support Grahame’s wife and kids and family and each other. Then – I preached – knowing there is nothing I could say that could take away the hurt and pain – other than time and God and good people helping good people.

I did feel good that I came up with a good line for my homily – at least I thought it was a good line. “This year the biggest Father’s Day card you’ll receive is the story of Grahame – because you all know he was such a great father to his kids and so many kids.” I added, “One lady told me that a kid had said to her, “Mr. Rice was the kind of father every kid wants.”

There’s a message there somewhere.

NUMBER PAINTING

I bought my father one of those number paintings for Christmas in 1969. It had a dozen different colors or something like that. His emphysema was getting worse – and he couldn’t get up and out as much – so I wanted him to have something to do. When painting the house – inside and out – I noticed he had a great smile while doing trim work. Well he only got to number paint number 4 or so. We saw him in the hospital on Father’s Day that June 1970 and he died a week later. I took the painting. I never finish things like that, but I finished that painting. It was of the Last Supper.

There’s a message ther somewhere.

THE TRINITY

I am grateful for the gift of faith that my mom and dad gave to us.

I am grateful for the gift of faith that our church has passed down to us. God is a God of salivation – not a God of condemnation. – as we heard in today’s gospel.

I am grateful for the teaching and the theology that Christianity teaches – that God is 3 persons – a Trinity of persons – a Trinity of Relationships. These are human words. We have to die to find out what God is really like. And we all prayed: “Not yet, God. Not yet!”

That God is a Trinity is quite a teaching. It’s quite a belief. It’s quite a revelation. It’s beyond our understanding. It’s something we could never come up with up with on our own.

We can discover God without the Bible or revelation. Show me a chair or a car – and tell me it just happened. There has to be a carpenter or a carmaker.

Show me the stars at night – the hair of a golden retriever on a mission running in a field – catching a Frisbee or a ball – the hands of a child – the smile of a Down Syndrome person – the taste and look of watermelon in the summer – the White Mountains of New Hampshire – the Rockies – Zion National Park – dolphins running – fire flies on a summer night – and tell me there is no Creator. If you tell me you don’t believe – I will shrug my shoulders and say, “Interesting!” Hey, we can be stiff necked people – as the folks in today’s First Reading might have put it.

Show me a child – I know there is a father. Pinch myself – I am here because of my mother and my father.

So creations proclaim that there are creators. Effects proclaim that there are causes. If the pins scatter in the bowling alley, someone threw a bowling ball.

That’s God the Creator – that’s God the Imaginer – that’s God the artist – that’s God the Designer – that’s God the Sculptor – that’s God at play.

The title of my homily is, “A Trinity of Relationships.”

God the Trinity – brings us to Christ and the Spirit.

God the Trinity – brings us to relationships.

God the Trinity – brings us to communication – to be in communion and communication with each other – discovering and developing all those strong interpersonal skills we heard about in today’s Second Reading.

God the Trinity – brings us to a dynamic – of Three Persons – involved in this vast universe – involved in the lives of billions and billions of people – involved in billions and billions of years so far and billions of years to come – and then some – based on the life expectancy of our sun – and who knows what our world will come up with? We intelligent folks have been around for less than 100,000 years – and that’s a tiny slice of time.
In Christianity the Trinity is labeled as Father, Son and Holy Spirit.

Who knows how that belief will keep developing and unfolding in time to come?

THERE’S A MESSAGE HERE SOMEWHERE

The one big message for me as one human person is to ask God to continue to have a relationship with me – that I continue to grow – into this Trinity – to start that now and enjoy the dance, the banquet, the whatever God is, for all eternity.

I have learned the truth of one of the earliest messages of the Bible – Genesis 2:18, “It’s not good to be alone.”

God knows that – the sooner I learn that and enter into that – with God as a Trinity of Persons – the better it is for me – the more I am made into the image and likeness of God.

CONCLUSION

Let me close with one of my favorite stories. It’s from Robert Fulghum. He’s in his house – reading or writing – and some kids are outside on the street playing “Hide and Go Seek!” and some kid is hiding in Fulghum's front yard. And he says, “Every group of kids always has one kid who is super great at hiding.”

And he says he wants to open up that window and yell down to the kid, “Get found kid. Get found kid.”

And I wanted to yell to all those fathers I assumed I was seeing in Denver, “Get found kids. Get found kids. Your kids want to find you.”

And I want to yell to every father who is hiding in his work or in his hobbies or his computer or what have you, “Get found dad. Get found dad” and if you’ve been found they you know that every day is a Father’s Day.

And I hope we all continue to hear The Good Father yelling to us in the garden. I hope we realize the whole game it start yelling out to me, “Find me. Find me – find my Son and his Holy Spirit as well.

IT KIND OF MAKES 

ME WANT TO KNOW,  

"WHAT WAS FREUD'S 

DADDY LIKE?

Quote for Father's Day - June 19, 2011

"I could not point to any need in  childhood as strong as that for a father's protection."

Sigmund Freud [1856-1939]

P.S. This from a guy who also said, "At bottom God is nothing more than an exalted father." in Totem and Taboo [1912-1913]

VAN  GOGH

Quote for Today - June 18, 2011

"What makes people the world over stand in line for Van Gogh is not that they will see beautiful pictures [but] that in an indefinable way they will come away feeling better human beings. And that is exactly what Van Gogh hoped for."

John Russell, New York Times, October 19, 1984

Painting: "Starry Night Over the Rhone," by Vincent Van Gogh, Oil on Canvas, Arles, France, September 1888. It can be seen, if you get on line,  at the Musee d'Orsay, Paris, France.

Tap, tap the painting with your mouse to make the painting larger on your screen.

BOASTING OR BRAGGING

INTRODUCTION

The title of my homily for this 11th Friday in Ordinary Time is, “Boasting or Bragging!”

The last line in today’s first reading is, “If I must boast, I will boast of the things that show my weakness.”

Paul is the one who is saying this. Boasting or bragging are synonymous – and scholars are not sure just what the origins of both these English words are. Either is a good translation of the Greek verb, “KAUCHAOMAI” – which is used in our text today – 2 Corinthians 11:18. One Greek Bible dictionary says “glory in” would be a good first meaning. (1)

Glory in, boast, brag, we have all experienced people who are after the glory, people who are braggers and boasters. However, to be honest, don’t we all have something we’d like to brag and boast about.

What does our list look like: accomplishments, car, house, looks, money, where we've been, whom we met? What's in our trophy case?

IT’S FUNNY

Paul says in his letter here that he will only boast of his weaknesses.

It’s funny because he says that just after he has given us a list of all the struggles and sufferings and trials he has gone through. Of course he keeps adding, “I’m speaking foolishly or crazy here!” Yet he still tells us that he has had far more imprisonments, beatings, brushes with death, was beaten 5 times with 40 lashes minus 1, was stoned once, was beaten with rods 3 times, was shipwrecked 3 times, hungered, thirsted, traveled, much more than everyone else, and by the way, I’m not bragging about all that. I only brag about my weaknesses. Listen again to the last line in today's first reading: “If I must boast, I will boast of the things that show my weakness.”

TODAY’S GOSPEL

Today’s gospel – Matthew 6: 19-23 - doesn’t use the word “boast” or “brag,” but Jesus pretty much challenges us about stuff – which many use as things to prop themselves up to look better than others.

Then there are those who use a great body to look down on those who are overweight or what have you.

As I thought of that – for some reason I thought about eyes. In the vestibule of the church – after Mass – as people are leaving – when saying, “Good bye!” and “Have a great day!” I try to look people in the eye. It happens very fast, but I want to be able to boast and brag that I try not to be mechanical. Smile.

Well, in doing that, every once in a while, there is the person with amazing eyes – different eyes – stand out eyes. I’m sure you’ve met folks from time to time with fascinating eyes. I never asked that person, but I sense they know they have special eyes. I’m sure I’m not the only one who wants to tell them, “You have fascinating eyes.”

This triggered the remembrance of the girl on the cover of National Geographic in 1985 who had fantastic green eyes. Then I remember reading that someone went back a few years ago to the Afghan / Pakistan border area and found her. She aged prematurely – and that cut down on the beauty of the frame that held those eyes – her face – but she still had great eyes – and a photographer captured them again. I found the 1985 girl’s picture and put it on top. Check out the story on Google - if you want to see what she looks like years later.

So if you have great eyes, brag about them – at least in the mirror - to yourself once and a while.

Now back to my homily, after that distraction. Great eyes can be very distracting.

Jesus is far more interested in the inner eye – to get that right – and forever – the I who I really am – the real me.

Jesus challenges us to look at how we see!

Are we walking by the unseen? Do we see ourselves as better than everyone else? Do we see as Jesus saw?

CONCLUSION: ON SECOND THOUGHT

However, on second sight, I think I got the insight on why St. Paul brags about his weaknesses: they got him to realize he can’t solve his problems – only God can – and our weaknesses can bring us to our knees.

In AA or any of the 12 Step Programs that flow out of it – the first step is to admit our weakness over some addiction. The next step to ask a Greater Power to help us overcome that weakness. We need God - we need Group  – Community.

So isn’t that one of the reasons why we come here to Mass – why we come before Christ on the cross – the big sign of weakness – so that we can rise each day to a better Way to do life.  Amen.



NOTES

(1) W.E. Vine, Expository Dictionary of New Testament Words, Four Volumes in One, Zondevevan Publishing House, Grand Rapids, Michigan, 1952.

WANTING OTHERS TO

BE OTHER THAN THEY ARE

Quote for Today - June 17,  2011

"The passion for setting people right is in itself an afflictive disease."

A comment by Marianne Moore - remembered at the time of her death - Feb. 5, 1972.

Picture on top of Marianne Moore throwing out the first ball at Yankee Stadium in 1968. As a poet she also wrote about baseball.