SITTING ALL ALONE

Dried, dead flowers
on a mahogany end table,
she couldn’t throw them out - yet.
Silent, quiet rugs everywhere,
she, sitting there all alone
in what was once their living room.
She was gazing without really
seeing the gray drizzle outside
on the other side of
their large picture window.
She has been spending
much of her time sitting there
with herself on their couch,
sitting there in their big house,
half empty since he died too soon,
twenty four days ago today,
gray loneliness inside,
along with the shrill scream
she let out that afternoon
as she heard him fall
in their bathroom - a sudden
heart attack - dead before
he hit the floor as she
was sitting there all alone
waiting on their couch,
waiting for his return.

© Andy Costello,

Reflections, 2008

ONE DAY AT A TIME

She, blurting out
unconnected comments
from a brain rearranged
from too much booze,
too many years of sitting
on too many bar stools,
in too many different beds,
laughing, crying,
then too many mornings
not knowing that her face
had become pumpkin skin color,
then,
then, through the amazing grace of God,
lost becoming found,
waking up face down,
waking up with herself –

experiencing her own personal Easter -
the resurrection of a new person,

now trying one day at a time
with coffee and cigarettes,

and a few good friends ,

and not enough AA meetings,
trying to find some furniture,

working better at her old job,
slowly moving into and enjoying

being in her own

getting better mind and skin.

She's doing it, by God. She's doing it.

© Andy Costello,

Reflections, 2008

HOT  AND  COLD  CLING

Sometimes I don’t sort my socks
and the rest of my laundry 
till a few hours after
I take them out of the dryer.
Surprise! The heat is still in them.
Sometimes the cold stays in a pair of gloves
for a long time after I had to find them
in the trunk of my car on a cold morning.
Heat, cold, cling to stone or a pair of pliers.
Does my warmth stay with those I like?
Does my coldness cling to those I avoid –
to those I try to freeze and squeeze out of my life?

© Andy Costello

Reflections, 2008

PLAN A or PLAN B?

The lonely boy hiding, always retreating into the shadows, letting others raise their hands in class, or star in games, suspicious of everything about himself, except his plan of meeting the perfect girl who will take his ugliness away, who will finally make him feel important. But he silently wonders night after night: what will happen if she has the same plan for him? Will it work? Can they change their plans? Will they?

© Andy Costello

Reflections, 2008

FOREIGN OFFICE

“Is this the office?”
“Yes. Maybe I help you?”
“What?”
“Maybe I help you?”
“Oh... Well, can I talk to somebody?”
“I somebody.”
“Well, can I talk to somebody else?”

© Andy Costello,

Reflections, 2008

THE PATH

It was a path she never took before.
It was a path she never knew was there before.
Yet it was there – hidden, but there.
It had been there — always there,
all through the years.
She must have gone by it a thousand times.
That day she finally stopped and saw it.
There it was: an opening in the hedges.
She stepped off the sidewalk,
walked to and then stopped at the opening.
She pulled back the tiny green leaves
so she could see inside.
There it was: a path, a narrow path to somewhere.
She entered.
She saw several people,
all walking that same path.
It was a path deep within herself,
tiny, narrow, winding, rocky.
That first year she came to nothing.
Yet, a voice within her kept saying,
“Keep walking.
Keep searching.
Keep coming back.”
One day she saw it:
a cross planted there,
but it was empty, silent.
It screamed no empty cry or empty curse.
The next day she came back.The cross was still there, still empty.
She prayed.
She stayed.
She waited.
The next day she came back
and this time she saw a path that lead to a tomb.
It was empty.
Suddenly, she knew:
"Christ had died. Christ had risen. Christ has come again."
She knew she had to take the path back home
back to family, friends, neighbors, world.
She did. She went through the opening in the hedges.
And from then on, she saw Jesus
some days on crosses, planted deep in every person,
some days, Risen – rising in so many people –
people long past empty cries and bitter curses,
people filled with forgiveness and inner room Peace.*

* Cf. John Chapter 20

© Andy Costello,

Reflections, 2008

*

DO YOU OWN THIS TEXT?

INTRODUCTION

The title of my homily is, “Do You Own This Text?”

I’m referring to today’s gospel text or story, but a lot more.

“Do You Own This Text?”

Let me get to what I’m trying to get at, this way.

FRANK MILES SJ

One of the persons who had a big influence on my life was a Jesuit priest named Father Frank Miles. I met him while making retreats at a Jesuit retreat house in Wernersville, Pennsylvania. He was a really neat guy. He has since died.

Now, for the last couple of years we have been going down to the Jesuit - Loyola Retreat House - in Faulkner, Maryland – for our St. Mary’s High School Kairos retreats. While on one of these retreats, I noticed they were putting up a new statue of St. Ignatius in the circle in the front of the house. Surprise, I find out it’s in memory of Father Frank Miles who was stationed there for years. I also found out that his brother was there for the putting up of the statue. So I went to him and thanked him for having such a wonderful brother – and how much Frank directed me while making retreats up in Pennsylvania.

Anyway. One of the several key things that Frank taught me was, “What scripture texts do you own?” It’s an obvious and a wonderful question: “What scripture texts do you own?”

Eventually, I asked him how many he owned and he paused, thought, and said, “Oh, about 70!”

Amazing. I would think I own about 30 texts more or less. How about you? How many scripture texts or stories or parables do you own?

PAPER AND PEN

Get a paper and pen. Sit down. Jot down scripture texts you own. Don’t open up a Bible? You don’t have to know chapter and verse – or exact exacts. Just jot down texts you know - scripture quotes or stories that come to mind.

You might start jotting texts or stories like the following:

· The Prodigal Son Story.
· David killing Goliath .
· The Good Samaritan Story.
· The Woman Caught in Adultery and they wanted to stone her to death – and then you add, "Jesus said, “Let the person without sin cast the first stone.”
· The Creation of the world and “all is good” stories.
· Love is patient, love is kind, love is never jealous ….
· Turn the other cheek.
· Take the narrow road – not the broad way.

Keep your list open. If you start this project, you’ll find yourself thinking about other texts while driving or during a meeting or while eating or what have you. You’re at the doctors office. A text comes to mind and you pick up a magazine to look for one of those pullouts, so you can jot down a text you thought of while sitting there. Then when you get home you transfer it to your master list. Remember! You don’t have to have any of the words exact.

THEN CROSS OUT

Then after you have your list you can take your Bible and try to find out where your texts are from. If you can’t find them, call the pastor Father Kingsbury or Father Harrison or Father Flynn, and they’ll let you know. They have nothing else to do – and would love to help you.

Then look at the texts and ask the question: “Which of these texts do I really own?” Translated: “What texts do I live by? What texts hit me in some form when I am faced with life’s different situations?”

For example: someone really hurts you and you want to strike back. You hear an inner voice say, “Turn the other cheek.” Then you begin to reflect upon this. You start thinking about the wisdom of non-violence – the wisdom of stopping the chain reaction of violence. You remember a cartoon you saw on TV a hundred years ago when a general yelled at a lieutenant and he went out and yelled at a sergeant and the sergeant yelled at a private who went out and kicked a dog and the dog chased a cat and the cat went after a mouse. So to stop the chain reaction of violence around the world, you turn the other cheek and smile here in Annapolis, Maryland. Doing this, you're meditating. You're reflecting. You just experienced the power of the Word. You own that text. That’s one.

Or for example, you’re at work. Everyone at the coffee break is talking about so and so who was seen with another man. Gossip is flying like rocks thrown at her – and you find yourself thinking, “Let her without sin cast the first stone.” If you say that to yourself, and you don’t throw nasty comments out at that lady, then you own that text. That’s two.

You might have written down, “David and Goliath” - how the little guy beat the big guy with all the odds against him – and then you think. “No, I know the story, but it has no big impact on my life. So that’s not number 3.”

TODAY’S GOSPEL

Now today’s gospel, or any gospel, or the first or second reading from any Sunday can be yours. You can own it.

The preacher hopes that each reading is Good News – that it helps you this week – as well as in this life. (1)

Today’s gospel is the famous Emmaus Story. We have all heard it many, many times. Do you own it?

While giving a high school retreat many, many years ago, I remember in a discussion session, some kids were talking about one of their nun teachers. They had nicknamed her, “Sister Mary Emmaus,” because she talked about the Emmaus story every single Religion class. And all the kids laughed and said, “Yeah, yeah!” I heard this story about this nun long before I had met Father Frank Miles, but I didn’t know about the owning of texts theory. Looking back, this nun with the nickname of “Sister Mary Emmaus” certainly owned this text.

The title of my homily is, “Do you Own This Text?”

This story about the two disciples on their way to Emmaus is worth owning.

The story is simple.

Two disciples of Jesus that Sunday were walking to a village named Emmaus. It was seven miles from Jerusalem. We’ve all seen people walking in two’s.

They were talking about everything that had just happened to Jesus.

We’ve all seen people walking together in the mall or down the street talking with great animation and excitement – hands moving big time.

While talking and walking, Jesus approaches and started to walk with them – but the key line is: “They did not recognize him.” He’s a stranger.

He asks them what they were talking about.

Frustrated at that, they say, “Are you the only resident of Jerusalem who doesn’t know what happened there the past few days?”

And he replies, “What things?”

Great storytelling – like so many stories in the Gospel of Luke.

And they tell him all about Jesus of Nazareth – the whole story – and how they had hoped he was the one who would redeem Israel.

And they even tell him about the women who went to the tomb that morning and found it empty – and how a vision of angels told them that Jesus was alive.

Then Jesus, the Stranger, starts talking. He breaks open for them the words of Moses and the Prophets and how they all point towards Jesus. Jesus owns all these texts. And they are overwhelmed by this stranger – who when they get to the village, seems to be going on. So they urge him, “Stay with us. It’s nearly evening – the day is practically over.”

So he stayed with him.

Now while eating together, Jesus took bread, pronounced the blessing, then broke the bread and gave it to them. Their eyes were opened and they recognized him. At that he vanished.

They said to one another, “Weren’t our hearts burning inside us as he talked to us on the road and when he explained the Scriptures to us?”

Scripture texts that burn us inside – often are texts we own.

They got up immediately and returned the seven miles to Jerusalem to tell the Eleven and the rest of the company their story – only to hear another version of what had just happened to them. “The Lord has been raised. It is true. He has appeared to Simon.”

Then two disciples who were going to Emmaus told what happened to them on the road and how they had come to know Jesus in the breaking of the bread.

You own this text if you have ever had a Jesus experience on a retreat or while traveling on the road or walking the dog or you’re at the beach and you discovered Jesus was with you on all the roads of your life; but and you didn’t know it till he took you all through the scriptures – all through the stories of your life – whether you have written them down or not. (Notice in today’s first reading from Acts that Luke owns Psalm 16:8-11 - when he says, "I saw the Lord ever before me...." Think of that reference in light of the Emmaus story.)

You own this text if you have ever had a gigantic breakthrough – understanding why you were born in Wisconsin or Oregon or the Philippines or wherever you were born – why you had the parents you had or whoever brought you up – as well as your brothers and sisters, friends, experiences, disasters, sufferings, successes, great moments, jobs, failures, why you met the people you met, married the person or persons you married, etc. etc. etc. You own this text when you hear it all broken down for you.

You own this text when you are here at church at Mass and Jesus helps you see all. The readings of the day might trigger some great insight and you laugh inwardly. You wink to Jesus for breaking open the words of your life for you. Then you hear the words of Jesus talking about breaking the bread. That Sunday morning – even if it’s raining outside – for a moment your life becomes as clear as the sunlight breaking through the dark on Easter Sunday morning.

You own this text if you realize this text is an Early Church Eucharistic text. What happened in this story is the hope for every Mass: words are broken and bread is broken. Isn't that the story of every life.

You own this text if you understand hindsight.

Hindsight happens the next day – or week – or year.

Hindsight happens with break – especially broken hearts – and death and sickness. We know a lot more about our parents years after they are dead than when they were living.

Hindsight comes from suffering. I love the quote – and I own it, “Suffering enters the human heart to create there places that never existed before.”

Hindsight brings insight – better – hindsight from hurt brings insight - stuff right in front of us that we were totally blind to.

CONCLUSION

So the title of my homily is, “Do You Own This Text?”

And I have given you some homework. Get out that paper and pen. Looking at your life, what texts have made you who you are – how you think – how you act?

* Statue of St. Ignatius of Loyola, founder of the Jesuits - at the Jesuit Retreat House in Faulkner, Maryland. The statue was placed there in memory of Father Frank Miles, S.J. Hint. Hint. Take your mouse and tap, tap on the picture and you can read the plaque below the statue.

(1) Check out an excellent article by Father Bernard Cotter, "Homily Truths" in The Tablet (London), March 29, 2008, page 17)