November 4, 2017

IF DOWN

If you’re down, if you’re depressed,

if you’re in the dark, if you’re lost,

then it’s time to find someone who

has a list of the steps you need to

take: # 1: Look around. #2: Get up. 
# 3: Listen for the sound of voices. 
# 4: Scream, “Help!” # 5: Go towards
the light.  # 6: Start moving. # 7:
Don't give up. # 8: Pause. # 9:
Listen some more. # 10: Keep 
moving slowly. # 11: If you meet 
someone ask them where we are. 
#12: Say, "Thank you."

© Andy Costello, Reflections  2017

GUIDED TOURS -

ESPECIALLY CHURCHES

INTRODUCTION

The title of my homily is, “Guided Tours - Especially Churches.”

NEW YORK CITY

Let me begin this way.

Years ago my niece Maryna invited me to go with her on guided tour in Manhattan, New York City. She was attending NYU at the time  - getting her degree in English literature and - she was asked to write a review for the school newspaper of one of 10 guided tours this company invited folks to make.

This one started at the Chrysler Building and ended up in Columbus Circle. Two hours in the morning - 10 till 12, then lunch, then 1 to 3 PM.

It didn’t include churches. Looking back, maybe one of the 10 tours was 10 churches or holy places in Manhattan or where have you?

I still remember a good bit of that day - and how enlightening it was - and for years later it gave me places I would take people who had never been to Manhattan before.

STATIONED IN LIMA, OHIO

When I was stationed in Lima, Ohio later on - in the 90’s - myself and a good priest friend of mine - were in a different parish  - preaching a parish mission - for a  week for about 20 weeks a year. We did that for 8 ½ years.

These were small parishes, so when we were there we began asking folks, “If you had visitors to this town, where would you bring someone?”

Annie Oakley

We went to Annie Oakley’s birthplace near Willowdell and Miamisburg, Ohio, and we went to Joe E. Brown’s birthplace near Holgate, Ohio and on and on and on.

Joe E. Brown

One place we preached was Delphos, Ohio. It was a huge church in the middle of nowhere, Ohio. The steeple was 222 feet high and you could see it from every farm for some 20 miles around or so.

The church was built in the 1800’s and it was in pretty bad shape when we first saw it. Different pastors raised money for a renovation - but a major fix up was rejected by parishioners down through the years. It was a big beautiful old German church with great wood carvings inside.

A Father Tom Gorman became pastor. He was a renaissance man and managed to get the church renovated. He didn’t destroy the treasures within - but enhanced and updated the church.

Surprise! The renovation that folks had rejected became honored. After all was finished, I found out that whenever folks had visitors from other parts of the country or what have you, the first place they brought folks to, was their church.

AN ASIDE

The following is an aside. Father Tom Gorman asked me once if we Redemptorists had a place in Manhattan, he would get a few overnights in - with two couples from his parish.

I called and asked our provincial house if 5 people could use the guest house there for 3 nights. A priest from Ohio wanted to visit New York City and see St. John Divine Church for the blessing of the animals on the feast of St. Francis of Assisi.

I got the rooms and they went. I was anxious to hear after they got back that they had a good time and received wonderful hospitality.

I met Tom at a meeting and he said it was a great trip and the Redemptorists showed him and his friends great hospitality.

The best news he told me went like this.

They wanted to get from Shore Road up to 4^th Avenue to get a subway car over to Manhattan. It’s a big hill and they were pointed in the correct direction.  However, when they saw a UPS truck they asked the driver, “Do you know how to get up to 4^th Avenue so we can get the R train.”  The UPS driver said, “Hop in.”

Then Tom said, “You’re not going to believe this. That evening when we got off the subway on 4^th avenue and 75^th street - Bay Ridge Avenue - they spotted a different UPS truck and they asked the driver if he knew how to get down to Shore Road. He said, “Yes, hop in.”

 I felt great. Not only did our house at Shore Road show great hospitality, but Brooklyn did as well.

NOW ST. MARY’S - TODAY’S FEAST DAY

Let me get to my last point.

Where do you take folks who visit you here in Annapolis?

My suggestion is St. Mary’s Church - Annapolis, Maryland.

Next suggestion: buy Robert Worden’s book - Saint Mary’s Church in Annapolis Maryland, A Sesquicentennial History, 1853-2003.

Since today is the feast of St. Martin de Porres, it hit me to make a visit to the statue of St.  Martin de Porres at St. Mary’s. It’s about 2 feet high. It was placed in the church in 1974.

By Reading Robert Worden’s book - taking notes - one could give a brief history of the Black Community in Annapolis. There was a St. Augustine’s church which lasted till 

I have to admit that I have not done my homework. So I have that on my agenda list.

Next one would have to do one’s homework on the life of Martin de Porres, a black or mulatto Dominican brother who worked in Lima, Peru. His dates are ….

I love the story that when there was a money shortage at the church he served he said, “Take me and sell me as a slave.”

CONCLUSION

So that’s a few thoughts about Guided Tours - especially of local churches. Amen.

November 3, 2017

SACRAMENTS

Sitting there, waiting for my plane,

in an airplane terminal, I began

listening to two men in the seats

just behind me. One said, “I used

to be a Catholic - but then I realized

I don’t believe in things like priests

and sacraments and all that religious

stuff.” Silence. Silence. Silence.

“Well,” the other man said, “I used

to be an atheist - but then I realized

we are all priests and we're all called 
to give and to receive the body and 
blood - of Christ - and all of creation - 
with all of creation - which we are 
all part of each and every day.”

“It was as simple as that,” he continued.
I had been baptized as a baby - but

standing at the sacrament of the ocean

one Sunday morning - all by myself, all

changed. It was 6 AM, July 4^th, 1999.

The round bread of the sun was rising

and I ran into the water and was baptized

into who I was in the first place - but

sorry to say, I had forgotten all of this.”

Silence. Silence, Silence, Silence.

© Andy Costello, Reflections  2017

ALL  SOULS  DAY 

  

        All Souls Day:

        prayers sinking from our hearts

        down deep into the graves

        of our dead beneath our feet

        or in the cemeteries in our hearts,

        prayers for those we talked

        at table with,

        prayers for those we walked

        these streets with,

        prayers for all those

        who have gone before us.

        Amen. Come Lord Jesus!

        Come Lord of the Living

        and not of the dead,

        because our creed is:

        we believe down deep

        you have risen from the grave. Alleluia.

·      Andrew Costello

(© Markings  Prayer for November 2000)

CEMETERY  PRAYER 

               Cemetery stones,

               standing here, row after row,

               close, so close, to the ground,

               like people fallen down dead

               in prayer before their dead ....

               Cemetery stones,

               kneeling here, row after row,

               reminding us that we too

               will have to kneel down here

               someday with these our dead ....

               Cemetery stones,

               planted here row after row,

               rooted in the earth,

               but reaching for the sky, waiting,

               waiting for resurrection and new life ....

               Amen! Come Lord Jesus.

               Come, Lord of the harvest.

               Come, Lord of resurrection 
               and new life.

·      Andrew Costello

(© Markings  Prayer for November 1996)

November 2, 2017

THEN THERE’S 

THAT CEMETERY ….

Then there’s that cemetery in the heart.

Heavy stones weighing down the memory.

Some with clear chiseled dates and words; some with words fading with each winter.

Death - burial - underneath the soil of the 

soul. Woo. I still miss you not being around.

© Andy Costello, Reflections  2017

LEADERSHIP: 3 POINTS

INTRODUCTION

The title of my talk is, “Leadership: 3 Points.”

I have given a talk on leadership at this COSA ceremony at the beginning of another St. Mary’s High School year - almost  year now for the last 14 years.

Thank you for this opportunity to think about this topic of leadership again.

At 77 years of age - I would guess that I still have a few words about this topic.

So I sat down and listed 10 possibilities. Then I picked 3.

I’ll save the other points for another year.

POINT NUMBER ONE: ASK QUESTIONS - FOR EXAMPLE?

A leader asks questions.

A leader listens for the questions people have.

A leader has to address his or her own questions about leadership and life.

A leader is often expected to give answers. I prefer to stress questions before answers.

And I think the # 1 question to ask is, “For example?”

Let me repeat that: “The #1 question for leaders to ask is, “For example?”

Asking that question gets each other  to think. It gets us to be more specific. The for example question forces clarity.

For example: “What are the specific issues we need to address when we talk about leadership?  Give me some examples.”

So leaders ask other people questions - more than giving answers.

I’m saying again for the 3^rd time, the number one question to ask is, “For example?”

I would think that example speaks louder than words - in fact, words to me are reflections and thoughts after the fact - after experiencing some example.

Looking forward, some of you will become coaches and captains of teams and for starters you will imitate the example of those you saw on the teams you were on.

Looking forward, some of you will be in organizations in this school - and future schools.

For example, some of you will experience COSA here at St. Mary’s. Those on COSA will influence you - in what you do and what you don’t do - how you saw people lead and not lead - how someone ran a meeting well or not so well. And hopefully, what you will learn are the examples you liked and didn’t like.

Looking forwards, most of you will become parents, leading kids into the future, and you will do parenting the way you saw your parents do parenting. There will be things your parents did that you won’t do - because you named them and you named how you want to be different.

If you don’t do that, “History will repeat itself.”

Someone said, “If you want to change someone, you have to change their grandmother.”

So what I’m saying here is this: “For example? is a great life question - to ask it a good 10,000 times before you die.”

When someone is complaining - when someone is accusing you of something, ask - say, “For example?”

Let me give one of my favorite examples. It’s called, “How To Use a Microphone.”

As COSA leaders - as any leader - learn how to speak loud and clear when you stand  up to speak up at a microphone.

At different times in life, you will go to the microphone.

When I get a chance,  I like to tell anyone who will listen, “Here’s how I learned to use a microphone.”

For example, someone says to you, “You were at the microphone and it’s obvious, you don’t know how to use a microphone.”

So you answer back, “Sorry! I didn’t know that. Thanks for telling me. Well, can you show me how to use a microphone?” 

When you do that, you’re asking, “For example, what’s the best way to use a microphone.”

It’s then I say, “Make a fist. Then make a ‘Thumbs up.’ with that fist. Then put the tip of your thumb on your lips - still making a fist. Then leaving your hand exactly as it is,  fold in your thumb.”

If you don’t know how to use a microphone, that’s Lesson  # 1. That’s how close you should be to the microphone - if you’re not sure. It’s the length of a thumb: around an inch and a half.

Now,  I want to say, “If one person here this morning heard what I just said about how close you should be to a microphone - and puts it into practice for the rest of your life, then I have been a leader. Then it was worthwhile for me to come to this microphone to speak today.”

I heard someone say and show that way to use a microphone in the 1970’s and I have been practicing that  ever since when I use a microphone.

For example, I was at a meeting on Riva Road on Opioids last Tuesday and I heard people yelling about 37 times to the people on stage, “Not loud enough!”

Those speaking were too far from the microphone.  They could not be heard. I was not in charge, so I didn’t say anything, but if I was in charge, I would show them the fist, thumb, to the mouth trick.

There are other tricks - but that’s one practical one:  The Fist and Thumb to the Lips example.

Leaders need to be heard. Speakers need to be heard.

Learn how to yell at speakers, “Louder!” The other day - after a lot of people could not be heard - a bunch of people did yell out and some people got closer to the microphone.

Leaders need to be heard for starters.

SECOND POINT: THE TASTE TEST

In your lifetime you will experience a lot of laziness, craziness,  people making comments that are not thought out too well. People don’t prepare. People don’t do their homework. 

To put it bluntly: In your lifetime you will experience a lot of crap.

So my second suggestion for being a leader is that you learn to use the taste test.

It goes like this.

A person is walking down the street. He or she stops. They see something on the sidewalk. They go over to it and say, “It looks like.”

They get down on their knees, bend over it and smell it. “It smells like.” 

Then they take their finger and touch it and say, “It feels like.” 

Then they taste it and they say,  “Oooh. This is crap!” 

Then they say, “Good thing I didn’t step in it.”

A leader knows crap when they see, smell, touch,  taste and almost step in it.

For the rest of your life, you will experience people feeding you a lot of crap - in dating, with regards drugs, in business meetings, and especially regarding money.

People want your money and they will feed you a lot of crap to get it.

Don’t fall for it - and you know what   IT  is. It rhymes with it.

Remember you heard it  here - this second point about leadership.

THIRD POINT: BE A GLOBALIST

There are two kinds of people, those who build walls and those who build bridges.

I hold that good leaders build good bridges. I hold bad leaders build walls.

I don’t know how much it will cost to build a new Bay Bridge.

Ask those stuck on Route 50 on most Friday evenings here in Annapolis - as they inch their way forward so that they can cross the Bay Bridge - into Eastern Maryland if they would want a new or bigger Bay Bridge. Or asks that some question on Sunday night to people coming back over the Bay Bridge from the Easter Shore of Maryland. Ask them if they prefer walls or bridges?

As priest - I know one of the key jobs for a priest is to build bridges.

As priest I know that a New Testament word for priest and pope is pontifex - meaning bridge.

I love Michelangelo’s painting on the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel in Rome. It has God reaching out his finger to touch Adam’s finger. It then shows Adam  pointing his finger to touch God’s finger. It’s two fingers trying to bridge the distance between two people.

Notice God’s hand is not a fist.

Notice Adam’s hand is not a fist.

If people asked me, “Is there anything in the world  you don’t like to see happening?” I would answer, “Yes.”

If they then asked, “For example,” I would say, it’s this call to be nationalists - isolationists - to build walls that separate people from people. It’s this urge to wall out people.

It would be this tendency to make fists - instead of open hands; to shake a fist at another instead of making an open hand to shake on a deal with each other.

I see it in groups. People want to isolate and insulate each other from each other - to push away and bully away people we don’t like.

A leader notices hands when with others.

It’s happening right now on the border between Myramar and Bangladesh. There is a group of people who are labeled the Myramar Rohingyas. They are Muslim. They are also labeled “the most friendless people in the world.” 300 to 400 thousand are trying to migrate and move - trying to find a place to live. Hindus and Buddhists, and other Moslems are giving this group of Muslims a tough time to find a place to exist.

If there is one thing in the world that is happening in the last 20 years it’s migration.

What’s your position on people coming into America? Wall them out or invite them in?

If there is one thing that’s happening in our world, it’s this brownification of peoples. Next time, you're in New York City or Toronto, take the subway. Look around at the color of the skin of the people traveling on spaceship earth with you. Study the people you are moving and migrating on this train called, "earth" with.  People are falling in love with those around them. People are having mixed marriages. People are having multi-cultural babies. We are becoming one world - whether we like it or not.

For the sake of transparency I grew up within eyesight of the Statue of Liberty. Its base or bottom line plaque invites the world’s tired and poor to come to America and join us.  Listen again to what that Statue says, “Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to breathe free, the wretched refuse of your teeming shore, send these the homeless, tempest tost,  to all. I lift my flame beside the golden door.”

That is part of my Christian outlook on life.

It’s everyone’s earth.

All are welcome.

For the sake of transparency my parents came to America from another county - speaking both English and Gaelic. My parents had little education. My parents did what many people who come to America did. They earned money and sent it back home to pay for their brothers and sisters to come to America - as well as to feed those back home.

I’m 77. You’re 17 and younger. Lucky you: because you’re going to be seeing the world’s borders crumbling a lot more than ever in the next 50 years.

That means there will be pushback - and screams about immigration - legal and illegal.

People are going to want more and more walls - so that what they perceive as their land and their stuff - that it will be protected.

Christians forget the Resurrection story - when Jesus came through walls and said, “Peace!” [Cf. John 29:19-21.]

So leaders there is my third point for leadership. Have as 1 of your 3 key points: “All are welcome.”

I would hope that COSA leaders here in St. Mary’s would be highly in favor of no walls - no cliques - no isolating people who seem to be or seem to look different than the who I am.

CONCLUSION

Let me close with a quote about leadership - that touches on  my 3 points for this morning: “A little old lady was refused a hearing by Alexander the Great. She spoke up and reprimanded him saying, `If you have no time for the little person as well as the big, you have no time to be King.’”  

O - O - O

This was a talk I gave to our St. Mary's High School students at the beginning of this new school year - when the Council of Student Activities - were sworn in as the COSA  leaders.