FREEDOM OF CHOICE
“The last, if not the greatest, of the human freedoms: to choose their own attitude in any given circumstance.”
Bruno Bettelheim [1903-1990]
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
DO I HAVE A CHOICE?
INTRODUCTION
The title of my homily is, “Do I Have A Choice?”
How many times in our lives have we asked that question?”
When was the first time in our life did we ask that question? Was it at the dinner table? Spinach? Broccoli? Do I have a choice?
Was it the first time we went to a restaurant and we were handed a menu?
Do I have a choice?
WAKE LAST NIGHT
I was at a wake on Friday evening and a couple came over to me with the question every priest is asked at weddings, wakes, airports, parish gatherings, before and after Mass: “Can I ask you a question?”
It never hit me till I began thinking about this sermon, “Do I have a choice?” Obviously, I better not say that.
The couple asked me, “We were having an argument – the other day – with Lent coming up – and Ash Wednesday coming up this coming Wednesday. If you give something up for Lent, is it the whole of Lent or can you have Sunday off?”
He said, “When we were kids, if we gave up cake for Lent, we could eat it on Sunday.”
She said, “When we were kids, if we gave up cake for Lent, it’s the whole of Lent – including Sundays.”
How’s that for a, “He said. She said.” argument.
I said, “It’s up to you? You have a choice.”
And I also think that’s where the thought for this homily came from.
TODAY’S READINGS
It never hit me till I began thinking about this sermon, “Do I have a choice?” Obviously, I better not say that.
The couple asked me, “We were having an argument – the other day – with Lent coming up – and Ash Wednesday coming up this coming Wednesday. If you give something up for Lent, is it the whole of Lent or can you have Sunday off?”
He said, “When we were kids, if we gave up cake for Lent, we could eat it on Sunday.”
She said, “When we were kids, if we gave up cake for Lent, it’s the whole of Lent – including Sundays.”
How’s that for a, “He said. She said.” argument.
I said, “It’s up to you? You have a choice.”
And I also think that’s where the thought for this homily came from.
TODAY’S READINGS
Today’s readings – especially the first reading, the Psalm, and the gospel – give us choices.
It’s up to you. You have a choice.
Today’s first reading and Psalm – give us a very clear life choice.
Jeremiah says, “Here’s your choice. Here’s the menu. You can either be a barren bush, a dry shrub, in the desert, that enjoys no change of season. It just stands there in a lava waste, a salt and empty earth. Or you can be a tree planted near water – that stretches out its roots to the stream. It doesn’t fear the heat – or drought. It stays green and bears fruit. Which do you want to be?
Do I have a choice?
Yes we do.
The Psalm for this Mass is Psalm 1. It’s the first hymn in Israel’s hymn book. It has almost the same image as Jeremiah gives us. The song writer starts with the positive first. “You can be a tree planted near running water – that gives fruit in due season and whose leaves never fade. Whatever this person does, he or she prospers. Or you can be empty or dead like chaff or leaves on the ground that blow this way or that way in the wind.”
The choice is always ours.
Am I alive or dead? Today’s second reading talks about resurrection from the dead. Paul is talking about end of life death. Christ talks about life here and hereafter – resurrection now and in eternity. The choice is ours.
Do I have a choice?
Yes we do.
HIGH SCHOOL RETREATS
It’s up to you. You have a choice.
Today’s first reading and Psalm – give us a very clear life choice.
Jeremiah says, “Here’s your choice. Here’s the menu. You can either be a barren bush, a dry shrub, in the desert, that enjoys no change of season. It just stands there in a lava waste, a salt and empty earth. Or you can be a tree planted near water – that stretches out its roots to the stream. It doesn’t fear the heat – or drought. It stays green and bears fruit. Which do you want to be?
Do I have a choice?
Yes we do.
The Psalm for this Mass is Psalm 1. It’s the first hymn in Israel’s hymn book. It has almost the same image as Jeremiah gives us. The song writer starts with the positive first. “You can be a tree planted near running water – that gives fruit in due season and whose leaves never fade. Whatever this person does, he or she prospers. Or you can be empty or dead like chaff or leaves on the ground that blow this way or that way in the wind.”
The choice is always ours.
Am I alive or dead? Today’s second reading talks about resurrection from the dead. Paul is talking about end of life death. Christ talks about life here and hereafter – resurrection now and in eternity. The choice is ours.
Do I have a choice?
Yes we do.
HIGH SCHOOL RETREATS
I’ve done a lot of high school retreats in my life.
Unlike teachers in a high school, I don’t have to follow a syllabus. I have freedom of choices.
One of my favorite and enjoyable discoveries was Values Clarification Exercises. I’ve run into people who po poed them – as being part of Moral Relativism. I didn’t listen to those critics. I figured they never had to do high school retreats. If you have to come up three days of stuff, exercises, this and that, ways to keep kids busy, entertained, challenged, reflective on a retreat and if you’re trying to get into their faith stuff, you use the best stuff you can come up with. I also learned you had to protect the furniture of the retreat house – so keep them busy and avoid the boring.
So I loved to do the following. I would tell all the kids to stand up move to the center of the room. Then I would say, “You now have 3 choices. I’m going to say something like, “You’re home and you decide to go get some fast food, would you go to McDonald’s ] – and I would point to one end of the room] – or would you go to Burger King?” [And I would point to the other end of the room.] Then I would say, “And you have a third choice: to just stand there where you are standing – in the middle.”
Then I would begin with the ice breaker question. “If you were going out for some fast food, would you go to Taco Bell or Wendy’s?” And I would point to one end and say, “That’s the Taco Bell side.” And point to the other side of the room and say, “That’s the Wendy’s choice.” Then I would add, “If you don’t want to go to either, stand still in the middle.”
The first 3 choices were easy. Kids moved back and forth to the side of their choice – or stay in the middle – without looking at where friends were going. Amazing. As they got the gist of the game, I would say, “Take your time now. When you hear the choices, pause for a moment – then stand still or make your move.”
In fact, because kids moved too fast – sometimes it seemed without listening to the question – I would say, “I’m going to repeat the question a second time, every time from now on.”
“It’s Saturday. It’s summer. You can go to the beach or the Mall. Which would you choose? Beach down there. Mall over here.”
“Next question: looking at the Saturdays of this past summer, where were you more, beach? Or Mall?”
Then came the tougher questions: “If your best friend had horrible breath, would you tell them – or not tell them? All those who would tell go down there and all those who wouldn’t tell – go down there and those who are undecided or have another option stay in the middle.”
Then I would say, “Come back to the center. Next question. If you had bad breath, would you want a close friend to tell you that you have bad breath or would you want them to say nothing? Say something, go down there. Say nothing, go down there. Stand still if you have another option or you don’t want to make the choice.”
“Okay, your parents are fighting, fighting, fighting all the time. Would you want them to break up and you go with one of your parents? Or would you want them to stay together – even though life is miserable in the house – and in your family? If you want them to break up, go down there. If you want them to stay together, go over there.”
It was a great process. It allowed me to get into a variety of questions: family, sickness, relationships. It allowed me to get into the issue of cheating. It allowed me to get into alcohol and drug questions. It allowed me to get into going to church questions.
The tougher the questions, the more the hesitation, the more someone would peek to see where the crowd was going, the more the value of standing in the middle.
I remember once that 1 kid – went to the one side – and nobody else went to the one side he was on. When he realized he was all alone, his shoulders shrugged and dropped. Then I noticed he braced himself and stood tall – as if proud of his decision. A moment like that can make my day.
Then there was time for everyone to sit on the floor and talk about choices, reasons behind choices, as well as the myriad thoughts and feelings they had during the exercise.
Do I have a choice?
Yes I do.
TODAY’S GOSPEL
Today’s gospel from Luke has Jesus giving 4 beatitudes and then 4 woes.
Read them carefully. They are all either or’s. They are both ends of the spectrum – both sides of the room: rich-poor, hungry-satisfied, weeping-crying, being hated, denounced, excluded, insulted because one is following Christ vs. being spoken well because one is like a false prophet.
We have a choice to study, meditate, reflect, ask, about what Jesus meant by being poor, what our hungers are, what we cry about and what we laugh about, what following Jesus is all about.
Do I have a choice?
CONCLUSION
Ash Wednesday is almost upon us.
Do we have a choice to get Ashes?
Yes I do.
And if I want them I get up and go down the aisle and receive them.
Lent is almost upon us.
Do we have choices in Lent?
Of course.
Lent is a time to look at our life choices.
Am I just standing the middle?
Am I a dry thirsty shrub in the desert?
Or am I a living tree – planted near running waters – I come to church and my roots suck up the Living Water of God Sunday after Sunday?
I have choices. Read the menu. There are things you can do and there are things you can give up.
The choice is always ours. Amen.
Unlike teachers in a high school, I don’t have to follow a syllabus. I have freedom of choices.
One of my favorite and enjoyable discoveries was Values Clarification Exercises. I’ve run into people who po poed them – as being part of Moral Relativism. I didn’t listen to those critics. I figured they never had to do high school retreats. If you have to come up three days of stuff, exercises, this and that, ways to keep kids busy, entertained, challenged, reflective on a retreat and if you’re trying to get into their faith stuff, you use the best stuff you can come up with. I also learned you had to protect the furniture of the retreat house – so keep them busy and avoid the boring.
So I loved to do the following. I would tell all the kids to stand up move to the center of the room. Then I would say, “You now have 3 choices. I’m going to say something like, “You’re home and you decide to go get some fast food, would you go to McDonald’s ] – and I would point to one end of the room] – or would you go to Burger King?” [And I would point to the other end of the room.] Then I would say, “And you have a third choice: to just stand there where you are standing – in the middle.”
Then I would begin with the ice breaker question. “If you were going out for some fast food, would you go to Taco Bell or Wendy’s?” And I would point to one end and say, “That’s the Taco Bell side.” And point to the other side of the room and say, “That’s the Wendy’s choice.” Then I would add, “If you don’t want to go to either, stand still in the middle.”
The first 3 choices were easy. Kids moved back and forth to the side of their choice – or stay in the middle – without looking at where friends were going. Amazing. As they got the gist of the game, I would say, “Take your time now. When you hear the choices, pause for a moment – then stand still or make your move.”
In fact, because kids moved too fast – sometimes it seemed without listening to the question – I would say, “I’m going to repeat the question a second time, every time from now on.”
“It’s Saturday. It’s summer. You can go to the beach or the Mall. Which would you choose? Beach down there. Mall over here.”
“Next question: looking at the Saturdays of this past summer, where were you more, beach? Or Mall?”
Then came the tougher questions: “If your best friend had horrible breath, would you tell them – or not tell them? All those who would tell go down there and all those who wouldn’t tell – go down there and those who are undecided or have another option stay in the middle.”
Then I would say, “Come back to the center. Next question. If you had bad breath, would you want a close friend to tell you that you have bad breath or would you want them to say nothing? Say something, go down there. Say nothing, go down there. Stand still if you have another option or you don’t want to make the choice.”
“Okay, your parents are fighting, fighting, fighting all the time. Would you want them to break up and you go with one of your parents? Or would you want them to stay together – even though life is miserable in the house – and in your family? If you want them to break up, go down there. If you want them to stay together, go over there.”
It was a great process. It allowed me to get into a variety of questions: family, sickness, relationships. It allowed me to get into the issue of cheating. It allowed me to get into alcohol and drug questions. It allowed me to get into going to church questions.
The tougher the questions, the more the hesitation, the more someone would peek to see where the crowd was going, the more the value of standing in the middle.
I remember once that 1 kid – went to the one side – and nobody else went to the one side he was on. When he realized he was all alone, his shoulders shrugged and dropped. Then I noticed he braced himself and stood tall – as if proud of his decision. A moment like that can make my day.
Then there was time for everyone to sit on the floor and talk about choices, reasons behind choices, as well as the myriad thoughts and feelings they had during the exercise.
Do I have a choice?
Yes I do.
TODAY’S GOSPEL
Today’s gospel from Luke has Jesus giving 4 beatitudes and then 4 woes.
Read them carefully. They are all either or’s. They are both ends of the spectrum – both sides of the room: rich-poor, hungry-satisfied, weeping-crying, being hated, denounced, excluded, insulted because one is following Christ vs. being spoken well because one is like a false prophet.
We have a choice to study, meditate, reflect, ask, about what Jesus meant by being poor, what our hungers are, what we cry about and what we laugh about, what following Jesus is all about.
Do I have a choice?
CONCLUSION
Ash Wednesday is almost upon us.
Do we have a choice to get Ashes?
Yes I do.
And if I want them I get up and go down the aisle and receive them.
Lent is almost upon us.
Do we have choices in Lent?
Of course.
Lent is a time to look at our life choices.
Am I just standing the middle?
Am I a dry thirsty shrub in the desert?
Or am I a living tree – planted near running waters – I come to church and my roots suck up the Living Water of God Sunday after Sunday?
I have choices. Read the menu. There are things you can do and there are things you can give up.
The choice is always ours. Amen.
Sunday, February 14, 2010
Saturday, February 13, 2010
WISDOM
MADE SIMPLE
Februrary 13, 2010
Quote of the Day:
“The older I grow, the more I listen to people who don’t say much.”
Germain G. Glidden [1913-1999] Germain Green Glidden was a national squash racquets champion, painter, muralist, cartoonist and founder in 1959 of the National Art Museum of Sport.
Question: When you read this quote, whom do you think of?
Question: When you read this quote, whom do you think of?
Friday, February 12, 2010
Thursday, February 11, 2010
PERFECT MISTEAKES
CAN BE TASTY
February 11, 2010
Quote of the Day:
“Even perfect people buy pencils with erasers.”
Anonymous
Questions:
Have you ever made a mistake that you learned as much as a college degree from it?
What's the biggest mistake you ever made?
On a scale of 1 to 10, 10 being the highest, how easy is it for you to admit a mistake.
Don't you hate it when you pick up a pencil with an eraser - but the eraser is a bummer of an eraser - and then the erased area ends up looking horrendous?
__________________________________________
Questions:
Have you ever made a mistake that you learned as much as a college degree from it?
What's the biggest mistake you ever made?
On a scale of 1 to 10, 10 being the highest, how easy is it for you to admit a mistake.
Don't you hate it when you pick up a pencil with an eraser - but the eraser is a bummer of an eraser - and then the erased area ends up looking horrendous?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)